It Must Be a Damn Good Sign

I swear that marathon signs are like fine wine, they get better with age (not that I would know anything about fine wine. I get a lady woody when the big bottles of Woodbridge chardonnay go on sale for $9.99).

Anyway, when I ran my first marathon a few years ago, the status quo signs were, “Run Like You Stole Something,” and “Just Beat Oprah.” Great signs, but a bit tired and overused. Just like your mama (kidding!). I don’t know what’s happened these days, but it’s like the sign makers got a sassy attitude and a major sense of humor. Check out some of these from recent races:

The male perspective sign – he still might not get sex after holding up this sign. She could possibly be using training runs as an excuse and next it will be “I am still recovering from my marathon”:

The male perspective sign: I can’t imagine a woman holding up a sign that says “Go Sweet Ball Sac Go!”

The backhanded compliment sign: My hope is that this sign was made for his frat brother and not his wife.

The odd yet strangely funny sign: I wonder how long it took these two rocket scientists to think this one up. I hope they don’t do things to innocent mares.

The tell it like it is sign: My personal favorite because it happens to the best of us.

My dear friend Clair ran the Richmond Half Marathon last weekend and saw some of my all time favorites:

It this were easy, it would be called: ‘your mom’

Camel toe check here

{Let’s face it, camel toes are a very popular sight at a marathon. I wonder if some people spectate just for that. And the funny thing is, at mile 20, who gives a crap if everything is wedged all up in there? If I really cared, I get one of these but it might make me chafe worse.}

Seen any good signs recently? I saw another one that said something like, “Please finish soon, my arms hurt from holding this sign.” Couldn’t find a picture of it, though.

Do you look at signs while you run? No. Never. I am trying to hard to not die.

SUAR