It Is Totally Unacceptable to Defecate

It's funny how when you live with a body part your whole life, you don't have an objective view of it. Kind of like when you go to the beach and see this:




The owner of this gut might know that he has a larger than average stomach area, but might not entirely understand how others view him or how others throw up when they see him.


Kind of like my feet. When I posted that picture of my foot on my last post, I was very grateful to some of you for giving me that objective viewpoint on just how ugly my feet are. You see, I have always known they were pretty unsightly, especially that really long and finger-like second toe, but you guys helped me to be even more honest with myself about it. For example, mamasweeds had this to say:

They say that if your "pointer toe" is longer than your big toe it means you're sexy. I have to say I have never seen a pointer toe tower over a big toe like that in all the feet that I've ever seen - in person or on the internet. Just sayin'.

Then Tara said:

No offense, but your feet are about as ugly as mine....us runners should be proud!

Thanks for keeping it real ladies!!!

Did you all remember I am running the Hood to Coast Relay in 11 days? So I found out what my legs are:

Leg 7: 5.65 miles - rated HARD. Rolling hills on paved shoulder and country roads

Leg 19: 5.89 miles - rated VERY HARD. Challenging up and down hills on paved back country road. No cell phone coverage (dammit, I wanted to phone a friend. Or poll the audience. Someone rescue me).

Leg 31: 4.00 miles - rated MODERATE. Gradual hills on narrow paved back country roads.

Total mileage: 15.54 miles

Our team starts at 6:30 p.m. Since there are six legs and almost 36 miles to be run before mine, I am guessing I will start running at about 10:30 p.m. if my team mates are as fast as they claim they are. I think it is good to start running in the pitch dark on back country roads that are unfamiliar to me. I am feeling more and more secure just thinking about it. I might go naked (except for my headlamp) and spray paint myself a nice reflective orange color just to stand out.

Want to know something cool? Our team is sponsored by Puma. Puma is giving us our running outfits, tech shirts and new running shoes (to be worn at a later date). I figure this is the closest I will ever come to any sort of sponsorship so I am milking and it. And I do think I'm cool. Did I tell you I am a Puma-sponsored athlete?

One side note and a potential cause for my disqualification in the race. This is what it says in the Hood to Coast handbook:

It is totally unacceptable to litter, urinate or defecate on private property along the course.

Those of you who are regular readers of my blog (all three of you) know that the defecate part of this might be a problem for me. Although, it says you can't poop on private property, like in a 7-11 parking lot, it says nothing about public property, like a country road or something. So I'll probably be okay. Plus, defecting in one's pants is still allowed, right? Your own pants may be private property, but it is your own private property so that's allowed I'm pretty sure.

Anyway done a relay before? Any words of wisdom for this relay virgin?

PS: Check out this giveaway at Cross Country Squared@