I never know what I’m going to find in my email inbox.
Sometimes it’s an offer to enlarge my penis (<no, I do not have one – joke’s on you). Sometimes it’s my bank telling me I’ve overdrawn again. And, sometimes – like the case on Tuesday night – it’s an invitation to go the Nevis/St. Kitts to participate in the most beautiful triathlon in the world. Whaaatt?
On Saturday. Like, in three days.
Good thing I have a small bone of spontaneity in my body. I usually like at least 6 months to plan a trip out of the country. Guess this time I will settle for 3 days. WTF? It’s the Caribbean! It’s 86 degrees! It’s a race! It's all expenses paid! It looks like this! A scene from Survivor without the immunity idol, the bugs or the drama!
Guess what? It looks like this here today our my back door, so see you suckas!
I actually wasn't exactly sure where Nevis was. I had only heard of it because Kelly Ripa talks about vacationing there. I suppose it it’s good enough for Kelly, it’s good enough for me. Nevis is a very small island (36 square miles) in the West Indies. It’s a bit southeast of Puerto Rico. It is far from Denver. Like 3,000 miles. Thanks Google. You are my hero. You make me look smart.
Before I looked up where the hell Nevis was, I looked up the Nevis Triathlon. I’ll be doing the longer option (who go all the way there and go small?). The swim is in the harbor (Caribbean Sea-1,000 meters). The bike is two loops (40 miles) around the perimeter of the island. The run is a 10K and is on trail, road and beach.
Last night when I told Emma about it:
Emma: Mom, do you even swim anymore?
Me: Uh, no. Haven’t swam in over year. I’m sure it will be fine.
Famous last words. This is how I approach the unknown: “I am sure it will be fine” (because there is always wine if it’s not fine!)
I don’t have time to ship my bike. They are providing me with one for the race. They wanted to know how tall I was and if I wanted a road bike or a mountain bike. Hmmmm…I’ll take the road bike I guess. I’m supposing there will be no aero helmet, no clipless pedals, no hydration system. I am sure it will be fine! Nevis better have wine. Or rum. Rum would work.