6 Confessions For The Week

I love these posts. It lets me tell you the stupid (and mostly insignificant) little secrets I have. I like to think we all do tiny benign things that make us human. And, I love it when you tell me yours in the comments.

I know for me, crop dusting is usually at the top of the list. This reminds me of a fart story I had in the liquor store awhile back.  I hadn’t thought about that in awhile. You have to read it HERE.

Here are this week’s confessions:

1. I bought these cookies only because I knew my kids hate coconut and almonds. It’s all about me. I happen to love coconut and almonds. I guess another confession can be that there is blood in the picture below and I don’t know where it came from. But I swear I didn’t cut anyone with a knife when they were trying to take a cookie.

2. Tomorrow I am going to a Swim Lab with my new Ironman Boulder training group. I will be evaluated and judged for my poor technique. I do not like this. Sometimes I’d rather be a bad swimmer than be critiqued. I will wear this outfit to make sure I am well respected and taken seriously:

3. I took the necklace off the mannequin at Old Navy. I couldn’t find it anywhere else in the store and I wanted it. That in and of itself is not a big deal except that stealing it from the mannequin required climbing on the display stand and messing up the whole outfit. I still cannot figure out why my kids don’t like shopping with me.

4. Heidi did a double crap in someone’s yard and I only had one bag. I had used the bag to pick up crap #1 and wasn’t going to untie it to pick up crap #2. So I did what any law abiding citizen would do and kicked crap #2 into the street (this of course would be inadvisable with diarrhea).

This is not Heidi. This is a re-enactment from Google images

5. I spent several minutes yesterday watching this video of an infrared camera recording people in the airport farting and questioning if it is really real. I wondered obsessively that  if it was real how I could get my hands on one because seriously, I can hardly imagine a better form of entertainment.

6. I went to get my free carwash on my birthday and they said they don’t do that anymore unless you are part of the frequent washer’s club. I said I was, which is not true because I only go once a year.

Those are my biggies.

Give me one confession for the week.  You’ll feel better.

Ever have your swimming or running form critiqued? Yes, both. Let’s just say it is an ongoing process.

SUAR

PS: I have a really cool giveaway coming up this week, so don’t forget to check back mid-week.

When The Going Gets Tough

I am well into my taper for marathon #6. Unlike other times when I have gone taper crazy and have eaten my way through the pantry and fretted over every little ache and pain, this time I’ve been pretty low key.

However, the thing that continues to intimidate me is the sheer marathon distance. Even though I have done this 5 times before, the 26.2 mile journey never seems to be any less daunting. That is my way of saying how much I respect the marathon and despite how freaking hard it is, I keep returning. What is the damn allure?

“Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most, define us.”
—Deena Kastor, opening line from the movie Spirit of the Marathon

Here is what I know from past marathons:

• At some point I will be very miserable
• There will never be a moment when I think about quitting
• I will come in and out of wondering why the hell I do these races
• I will come close to shitting myself
• At some point I will hate all of the music on my iPod
• The highs will be extraordinary

Today, Coach Kastor really spoke to me when he sent this email. I love it for two reasons: 1) it applies to any goal we set for ourselves, not just running-related, 2) it doesn’t let us off the hook to do less than our best.

“On March 9th there will come a time when you have to choose how hard you’re going to push yourself.

Some athletes will choose to stop and rest, and others will continue to push through the discomfort, forging ahead to their marathon goals. 

How strong will you be when the going gets tough?  Will you be able to look yourself in the mirror on Sunday afternoon and honestly answer the question, “Did I give it my all?” or “Did I rise to the occasion?” 

Will you be proud of yourself and your accomplishment?  You should be. You should already be proud of yourself for sticking with the training program, getting up early to get your long runs in on the weekends, running in all kinds of weather conditions, because getting this far is a challenge in and of itself…

The marathon is merely the reward.”

One thing I will say about myself in any race I have ever done, including the Ironman, is that regardless of whether or not my time goals were achieved, I never have had any regrets. I have always done to the best of my abilities.

I tell my kids all the time that only they know if they are doing the best, I can’t know that for them. That is how I feel about my races. Only I can possibly know if I gave it my all.

What do I do when the going gets tough? The only thing I can do. Keep moving forward and know the struggle is a temporary one. That is all.

Now get me the hell out of 10 degrees and snow and into the sweet LA climate. And, I better meet some celebrities. Only just over a week to go ‘til I’m CA bound.

How many marathons have you run? Do you forget about the pain and sign up for another one right away? I do not forget about the pain. Yet, I am strangely drawn to the pain.

Do you have regrets about a particular race? I regret my second half marathon when I ran on a stress fracture. I knew I was injured going into it, and should have not even showed up.

Tell me one celebrity you’ve met. Greg Kinnear, Linda Ronstadt (I’m old), Aaron Neville (that’s 3, I know you are impressed).

SUAR

PS: Limited edition LA Marathon gear is now available. Lots of cool stuff. Go HERE.

Bystander Apathy

There is something that has been weighing heavily on my head since going to the gym this morning. And, it has nothing to do with running. Yes, running is important, but sometimes it gets trumped by more importanter stuff (like grammar).

You might remember last week that I sat with a woman at the gym who we thought was having a heart attack. (Turns out they thought it was a stroke, but after being hospitalized found out it was a complex migraine that caused her to be dizzy, to lose movement in her arm, and to be nauseated).

When I was asking about her today, the woman at the front desk who had called 911 that day told me that I was the only person who had stopped to help. She said countless people saw what was going on, and scurried out the door.

I am  not writing this to say I am some kind of hero. I did what I think and hope any of you would have done (and it really wasn’t much. I just comforted her until the paramedics came and then went to her house to get her husband). I am writing this to ask – WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

Have we become so self-involved, so afraid of connection, so scared of liability or so hurried that we can’t stop to help a human being who is clearly in need?  I can understand if one’s personal safety is at risk, but often times that is not the case.

At the end of the day, we are all just people. We are all connected by our humanness. Whether we are sub-2 hour marathoners, doctors, mothers, Oprah or the president of the Untied States, we all feel fear, pain, loneliness, joy – we feel these things on the most basic of human levels regardless of our circumstances. It should be our instinct to help others. It should not feel like an effort or something we do to get kudos and to be recognized. And, we should keep in mind, that someday we will need help ourselves. Let’s just hope those around us can accommodate.

One of my favorite quotes is “Our character is what we are when no one is watching.” (H. Jackson Brown). That kind of keeps me in check (especially when my dog poops and I don’t have a bag and am thinking of just leaving it).

Prior to this incident with the lady at the gym, I had read an article related to this epidemic of “Bystander Apathy (BA).” I am fascinated by the psychology behind BA, which has become quite an epidemic (watch this video to see it in action). Much research has been done on this and it’s been concluded that people are less likely to intervene for two reasons (assuming personal safety is not a concern).

1. We are less likely to help if there are many people witnessing what is going on (we figure someone else will step in) – yet, the more that people don’t’ step in, the more people seem to think the situation is non-emergent and don’t help anyway.

2. We are less likely to help those we see as different from us (race, socio economics, etc).

My deeper interpretation of why we stand by is that we are all scared to death. Scared of the unknown. Scared that becoming involved will demand too much of us. Scared that we won’t be able to handle it and will curl up into a ball of blubbering tears.

But, mostly I think we are terrified of failure. After all, if we choose to help someone and are unsuccessful (they die) or we don’t know what to do (we might look foolish!), then we have failed and we have to cope with the reality of that. Once again fear holds us back from becoming better.

Don’t let fear paralyze you. Life is so much better when we let it in and act anyway.

Lastly, here is a story of someone who acted (although too late) when he found a woman who turned out to be dead in the Starbuck’s parking lot. Just one of hundreds of stories that might have had a different ended, but for Bystander Apathy.

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Have you ever reached out to help a stranger in need? Why or why not? No, except for dogs.

SUAR

A Runner’s Enemy

This picture epitomizes something runners HATE.

No, runners do not hate the American flag. Please. We hate what makes the flag move: the WIND (I am not talking about “breaking wind.” Runners love that and do it constantly). This picture was taken from my back deck today before I went on my 10K run (30 mph mind you).

If you live in Colorado you know that we have been hit with numerous days of extreme wind this week. The winds in Colorado are not pussy soft breezes. The winds in Colorado are demonic unleashed monsters that blow over semi trucks and take shingles off of roofs. They have even been known to blow over almost-47-year-old-runners such as myself.

As with all of my training, when I hit adversity, I try to look at it as an opportunity to make me stronger. Damn, don’t we get sick of hearing that.

Hills = opportunity to do resistance training and to build my aerobic base.
Unintended sharts = opportunity to work on my pre-run nutrition and try my new detergent.
Heat = opportunity to prepare for, well, HEAT and to practice hydration.
Snow = opportunity to use different muscles to stabilize myself.

You get the picture.

That said, what does the wind give us? Why should we like it and actually consider it our frenemy? (<I hate that word, but it kind of worked in this case). I thought a lot about this on my run today as I tried to have a good attitude about the elements.

1. Running into the wind is actually resistance training, a technique used by coaches to help make runners stronger (kind of like weight resistance at the gym). Some say that running into 20 mph winds actually takes 20% more effort. Just think, you could spend $25 on a parachute or you could run in the wind for FREE!

2. If you are like me, you have spitting issues. It always ends up on my shoulder or arm. When you spit sideways while running into the wind, it flies away at 20 mph. No mess!

3. If you run in the windy conditions, this will help prepare you for the fact that it could be windy on race day. You are preparing for all conditions. You are smart and ready!

4. If you run into the wind, chances are at some point you are going to have the wind at your back.  This is a delightful sensation which involves feeling as if Don Draper or Ryan Gosling has their hand on the small of your back and is gently pushing you along.  (Although studies show you only get back about half of what you put into a headwind when you turn around and run with it at your back).

5. Farts don’t hang around.  Even SBDs.

6. When it is really windy, you are usually the only one stupid enough to be out there, so you have the whole path/shoulder/street/trail to yourself.

7. If it’s a hot day the wind might cool you off (yet, if it’s a freezing cold day you might die of hyperthermia).

8. You can give yourself permission to run slower. Check out this very interesting fact:

The moral of the story is you don’t have to like the wind. You just have to tolerate it. With anything, your attitude will be infinitely better if you look at the positives of the situation, rather than focus on the negatives.

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What do you think is worse to run in – wind, heat, snow or rain? I say WIND if it’s over 20 mph or so. The only element I don’t run in is ice.

What are you doing on my birthday tomorrow? I’m doing an 8 mile marathon pace run, getting my car washed/detailed (it’s free on your birthday!), maybe getting a pedicure and going out for amazing Mexican food and margaritas. And, having people massage my cock-six (coccyx). Just kidding. Maybe.

Speaking of – I got this gift from a friend today. I love my friends.

SUAR

What’s Going On This Week (in bullets cause it’s fun)

• I ran 16.18 miles today. It was supposed to be 20. The cock-six (tailbone) hurt. STILL. It’s been 10 days since I fell down the stairs and injured it.  I figured better to stop early than to run the ol’ cock-six into the ground (sounds dirty) before my marathon in 18 days.

• I farted in Target and ran into the shoe aisle.
  
• Ken and I just started binge watching Mad Men on Netflix. How have we not watched it until now? Oh, and by the way, the 2nd season of Orange Is The New Black starts on June 6, 2014. You’re welcome.

• Yesterday a woman at the gym (who does childcare, she wasn’t working out) was having a heart attack as I left the building. I sat with her until the paramedics came. Scary. I was relieved I didn’t have to use my CPR skills. I’m always nervous I won’t know what to do. Hopefully she is okay.
  
• My brother lives in Kiev, Ukraine with his family. If you watch the news, you know why I’m worried.

• It’s an early birthday for me as I got two surprises in the mail today:

A case of X2 Performance (which I now swear by with my training). Dave Scott just partnered with X2. Pretty cool:

And, a SWEET care package from Clif Bar (why do my kids think Shot Bloks are for their dining pleasure? Kids – they are not gummy bears!). If I look like hell that is because I am in a long run coma. I’m really excited to try the recovery drink.

• The freaky baby made a surprise appearance in the pantry. I actually hid it in there then ended up scaring myself. (isn’t it fun to look in people’s pantries? So random: peanut butter, seaweed, Luna Bars, Girl Scout cookies, parmesan cheese, and soy nuts).

• I read this book. You’d think as a social worker I’d have heard it all, but I am always astounded by choices some parents make. Memoirs are my favorite genre and this one did not disappoint.

Now it’s your turn.

Best book you’ve read this month? This one ^^^^

Have you ever had to do CPR on someone? No

Best series you have watched recently? Homeland Season 2 and now Mad Men

Tell me 3 random things in your pantry. I told you.

SUAR

Happiness Formula

Happiness formula = Do YOUR best and feel good about it. |

Unhappiness formula = Compare yourself to everyone else.

I read this simple, yet profound statement this morning HERE (one of my favorite blogs).

Let me ask you this:  have you ever had the experience of having a really solid run, or an amazing day with your kids, or a breakthrough at work – and then you talk to someone, or go onto Facebook or read a blog and all of a sudden you no longer feel so stellar about your day? You’ve probably just been part of the unhappiness formula, i.e., you compared yourself to everyone else and got in a stupid funk.

Why do we do that? Why isn’t it enough to be just do our best and feel good about it?

True, you could say that when we are really secure with ourselves, we are not brought down or affected by the external stuff. But, who is really secure with themselves anyway?

I think there has always been this FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) epidemic. There has also always been this FONBE (Fear Of Not Being Enough) epidemic. Yet, in the age of social media, it has become far too easy to be constantly exposed to what others are doing – their successful children, their amazing vacations, their PRs at every race, their perfect marriages, their extravagant meals out.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not blasting social media – I am very much a part of it, and I see the benefits. But, like everything, you have to be able to take it in doses of moderation. You have to be able to filter. You have to make sure that it is not swallowing you up, sucking your time and sending you into a dark hole of FOMO and FONBE.

I think we all need to find peace in who we are and own it. Own that maybe we will never live up to the ideal lives that we perceive around us (which we know are not really that ideal behind closed doors), but acknowledge that we are okay and enough anyway. It’s all about perspective and attitude.

So, if you are having moments of doubt that you are enough, instead of berating yourself – ask yourself, “Am I doing my best?” Only you truly know the answer. If you are giving your relationships, your job, your running, your children, your health, your community and yourself the best that you have to offer, then that is all that truly matters.

I am waxing all poetic because I turn 47 on Saturday. That means I am that much closer to 50 freaking years old so have to stop messing around and become an old sage.

SUAR

How Fast Do Runners Lose Fitness?

As I sat around all week unable to run I could feel my fitness slipping away like the grains of sand through an hour glass.

I love being dramatic.

I do know that this cock-six injury will not last nearly as long as other injuries I’ve had (#1, #2, #3), but still – not being able to run makes me cranky, bitchy and generally just not as nice of a person.

I am holding on so tight to my fitness level and do not want to lose one stinking bit. I know that is irrational – I mean it’s only been 5 days sans running – but these are the things I think about. I had high hopes for the LA Marathon and my training had been going so well….wah, wah, wah. The good news is that I was able to do a short run today with some pain, but not too bad. My PT said that running if my pain is about a level “5” should not give me any problems or keep me from healing. The worst is still just sitting, sneezing and getting out of the car.

I decided to research just how quickly we runners lose our fitness if we sit on our asses. And, really, that is what I have been doing because cycling hurts and yoga hurts and I just didn’t feel like swimming and I hate the elliptical (there I said it).

Here is the reality regarding fitness loss:

• Fact #1 –The biggest change in the body when one takes time off is in how the body consumes and process oxygen (VO2 Max)

1 week off = negligible decline
12 days –> 3 weeks off = 7% decline
3 weeks –> 12 weeks = 9% decline

• Fact #2 (good news!)– If you’ve been training for a long time and have relatively high endurance, you can maintain your fitness longer than someone who has more recently started exercising.
  
• Fact #3 (crappy news!) – It takes at least twice as long to gain fitness as it does to lose fitness.  That means if you detrain for 12 days, it could take you up to 36 days of retraining to get back to your original fitness level
  
• Fact #4 (good news!): Cross training and shorter/high intensity workouts can reduce the amount of fitness lost. Even doing lower volume, higher intensity workouts 2 to 3 times per week can help maintain fitness.
  
• Fact #5 (important news!): Even if you are not injured, it’s good to take time off from running every now and again, or significantly cut back just to give your body a break.

Moral of the story: It is important not to panic. Even if you are injured and need to stop running for many weeks, this doesn’t mean you will lose all fitness. Naturally, you will have to work your ass off to get back to your pre-injury fitness level, but see this is a challenge and a goal, not a reason to be completely devastated and destined to a life of self pity and cookie/cake bingeing.

If you are an IR (Injured Runner) and are in a really dark place – read “10 Ways to Survive Your Injury Without Being a Bitch” and “The Stages of Injury Grief,” written by yours truly.

For more info about losing fitness (and the source of the above info) check out these articles:

How Long Does It Take To Get Out Of Shape? – Competitor
Use It or Lose It - How fast do I lose fitness if I stop exercising? – Sports Medicine
How Long Before You Lose Your Fitness Level? – Runner Academy

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When was your last running injury that you had to take a lot of time off for?  I really haven’t taken time off due to a running injury since my hip stress fracture in 2010.

What cross training have you done during an injury? I’ve done tons of water running, cycling and swimming.

SUAR

The Word On The Street

Let me tell you, this injured tailbone (coccyx = cock-six)  thing is the pits (see post HERE). Why?

• I am not used to having my tailbone hurt all of the time (sitting, laying down, getting in and out of the car). You don’t really understand how often you put pressure on cock-six until you hurt it.
• Going to the physical therapist and having your upper crack massaged is awkward, even for a forward thinking gal like me. In the words of my PT, “Beth, this is no time to be modest.”
• I am so stubborn and want to run so badly that I did something I know you all have probably done with your injuries. Yesterday, I actually hobbled into the gym to do speed work (yes speed work) on the treadmill. Denial is a powerful thing. Two steps (yes, steps) into the run I got off and went home. I may be stubborn but I’m not stupid.
• The word on the street is that I cannot attempt a run until Saturday. I will try to focus on other things I like such as eating cookies, taking pictures of Heidi doing ridiculous things and finding out what character I am most like on Friday Night Lights by taking this quiz (Tammy Taylor, duh! Ken was Riggins, which made me laugh.)

In other exciting news…after all of your amazing feedback on which Ironman I should do – Canada, CdA, Cozumel, Louisville (provided my butt is not broken)…I have chosen…NONE OF THEM.

I got lucky enough to get a spot into the sold out Ironman Boulder.

This is good news for me because I can train on the course and make everyone who has ever met me come to spectate. It’s true, we Iron People like to talk about ourselves and accomplishments quite a bit. I know this from watching this video – so damn hilarious. 

And, in my last bit of news, I don’t think anyone really reads Good Housekeeping magazine (except in the dentist office – which is really funny because my dentist office called today to remind me of an appointment and said, “Nice article!” thereby proving my theory), but there is an article on Ken and me in the March edition about when he was laid off a couple of years ago. We are famous. If you’d like a signed copy, let me know (that was a joke). Btw, I do actually like GH magazine.

That’s all I got. Time to go lay on some more frozen peas. Or, maybe I’ll mix it up with some lima beans because I am crazy that way.

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What magazines do you subscribe to? I have cut back – now I only get People, Entertainment Weekly, Self, All Recipes, Runner’s World and The Week (<yes, that’s a cut back)

Have you or your spouse ever been laid off? We have been through two rounds of lay offs. Now things are steady.

Anyone doing IM Boulder?

SUAR

Keep Calm. You Only…

Here is a sweet story of irony for you (I think this may qualify as situational irony, but I am not sure. I’m no English major):

For two months I have been running on ice and snow, about 40-50 miles per week. For two months I have not fallen. I have not hardly even slipped. Yay for me.

And, then what do I do?

Last night I fell downs the stairs on my way to do my nightly house check (oven off, doors locked, coffee made for the morning). Basically, my feet slipped and I bounced down several stairs on my coccyx (one of those funny words in the dictionary). If it didn't hurt so freaking bad, it might have been really funny.

What is a COCCYX you ask (pron: cock-siks)?. It is a fancy name for tail bone. The area right above your butt crack. The area just below where tramp stamps appear.

If you have ever injured your cock-siks then you know how much it hurts. I cried. I iced. I heated. I did not take up Ken’s offers to go the ER, but just watched the Walking Dead and cried some more. I bet getting your head chopped off by a sword hurts more than a banged up coccyx.

By morning I wasn’t in as much pain, but I am so, so sore. Today was supposed to be a 6 mile run, but since you should not run with an impaired coccyx, I thought a rest day was in order. So, I drank some coffee:

Of course I have self diagnosed on Google. I have learned that I need to sit on a donut (that gets kind of messy, especially when I try to eat it at the same time – I’m flexible that way), ice, rest, take ibuprofen, and avoid long periods of sitting.  I’m assuming it’s okay to lay with a Heidi on your back.

Oh, and some lovely info I found online: “If your tailbone is sensitive during bowel movements, eat more fiber to soften your stools and drink water to flush out any constipation.” Another perk of a bruised coccyx! Painful pooping!

I am not sure what the lesson is from this. Some possibilities:

• Wear Yak Traks in the house
• Move to a ranch-style home
• Gain a lot of weight in the coccyx area so I have more cushioning for next time
• Do not do a nightly house check and stay awake all night wondering if I left the iron on (OCD)

I am trying not to panic about my training. I am at my peak for LA Marathon training and things have been going so well. I am going to assume each day I’ll be less sore and can resume my running. I know these things can take a long time to heal. This SUCKS.

Blech.

Have you ever injured your tailbone/coccyx area?

What’s the last household injury you had? Before this one I sliced my finger coring a pineapple.

SUAR

Tomorrow

This is what I’ll be doing tomorrow. For the third year in a row:

You can read Sherry’s story HERE.

I’ve had many people ask if there would be a run for Sherry this year, especially those in Montana close to where Sherry lived. So, yes, while not a formal run, we will be running. 

If you run tomorrow, maybe you could think of Sherry. When the last few miles of my long run begin to feel tough, I know that I can be tougher. Nothing could ever be as tough as what Sherry endured that day and what her family and friends continue to endure.

I will run in Sherry’s memory. I do whenever I run. But I will also run for:

• Kindness
• Peace
• Safety
• Gratitude
• Love
• Hope

I hate that bad things happen to people. We all do. I can’t make sense of such things, but I can learn the lesson. The lesson is to not take anyone or anything for granted. The lesson is to live life fearlessly. The lesson is to keep memories alive.  The lesson is that we are all going to die and we need to think about how we live our lives today and if it is something we can be proud of. What memories will we leave? What do we hope people will remember?

Sherry’s mom gave this to me at her funeral.
I like to think of her all sassy in high school wearing this.
I just might wear it tomorrow.

SUAR

Why I Love the Treadmill So Much It Hurts

I’m sitting here with my coffee eating this:

Isn’t anything called “Active Lifestyle” for grandmas? Well I’m not a grandma yet (not that I know of), but I do love this oatmeal. I might add some Metamucil to it so I can really be grandma-ish.

The only thing that made me laugh this morning was reading Remy’s World about Treadmill Myths. My favorite one is:

If you have sex on a moving treadmill, you can’t get pregnant: MYTH. You can, and probably will. Trust me on this one.

How would it even be possible to have sex on a moving treadmill? Maybe I am just not adventurous enough.

Yesterday Joie and I had a 6 mile run planned. I was headed out the door to her house when I got this text:

We went out anyway. After an hour in that arctic hell, my hands didn’t work. My mouth was so frozen I could not form words (not even “this shit sucks”), and joints I did not even know I had hurt.

So, no, I am not going out in that again today for my 9 mile run. Which means only one thing: Treadmill. I will not call it the “dreadmill” because apparently that is very uncool. I have spent way too much time on that thing this winter. Marathon training in January/February is icky, for lack of a better word. Am I being a whiny baby? Yes. Do I care? No.

In an effort to turn around my attitude, here is why I am excited to get on the treadmill.

• I might get a treadmill high
• I can wear shorts and will be warm.
• I can catch up on the news/tv shows.  This is also called being a treadmill potato.
• I can smell someone’s sweat/farts other than my own.
• I can watch myself in the mirror because I look really *hot* while I’m running.
• I can listen to the boys in the weight room dropping 4,000 pound weights and grunting. So attractive!
• I can hop off and in and instant be in a warm bathroom stall if needed. And, it will be needed.

I have tried really hard, and this is all I can come up with. So, off I go!

Give me one reason you love the treadmill. Just try.

SUAR

Sometimes I’m Flying

This is kind of a random post, but when it is –14 outside, sometimes you just have to go random.

Occasionally I will have wild and crazy dreams after I eat a lot of Dots or Hot Tamales in bed late at night. But, that is different from the RC (Recurring Dream).

See, I have this RC.  I wonder what it means. In the dream I am flying (like a bird, not in an airplane). Sometimes I am trying to get away from something or someone (not specified). Sometimes I am just trying to keep myself in the air. In the dream I know I can fly, but I also know it takes effort. (In reality I am probably just trying to finally PR in my marathon).

I’m a believer that when dreams recur it is usually because we are trying to work something out in our heads/emotions.

I looked up what this “flying” dream means. A flying dream where you are soaring without a care in the world has quite a different meaning than one in which you are struggling or afraid {source}:

Trouble Flying:

• Having a tough time flying in your dreams suggest that someone or something is stopping you from moving to the next step in life.
• Try and think what was stopping you from taking off in your dream whether it was a you, a friend or a building that was in  your way.  These objects or “dream symbols”  help us determine what is stopping us from moving up in the world.

In reality I can’t fly, except for this one time a couple of years ago:

I am not sure how much I buy into dream interpretation, but it does give me something to think about. Is someone or something holding me back? My guess is that it is myself. That alone is an epiphany.

I was curious what some other recurring dreams are. TGFG (Thank God for Google).

The 5 most common recurring dreams (from HERE):

1. Teeth falling out: means you need to be careful of what comes out of your mouth, i.e., improve communication skills

2. Being chased: means you should stop avoiding things

3. Keep Finding filthy, clogged toilets: means you read this blog too much. No really, it means you have trouble expressing to others (“relieving to others”) what is bothering you. Your emotional plumbing (shit) is backed way up.

4. Being back in school: means you are feeling unprepared or uncertain about something like a job, a race, a relationship, etc.

5. Being cheated on: means you aren’t getting the attention you need in your relationship

Look at that, I just solved your problems.

Do you have a recurring dream? What do you think it means? I have the flying one, of course. Before races I always have the one where you show up late (and sometimes naked) and the race has already started. I also have dreams about people I used to be close to and have lost touch with. I think it is my mind’s way of trying to get closure.

SUAR

Get Tough

Truth be told, I was being a baby/pussy about today’s 21 mile run. It had been snowing for two days. It was colder than a witch’s tit (which around here is single digits. Research has shown that is exactly the temperature when a witch’s tits freeze). I dreaded putting on the Yak Traks and suffering through the elements…once again.

I emailed Coach Kastor last night. I don’t know what I wanted him to tell me. I just needed something. Here’s what he said:

“Don’t worry about how many miles you cover, it could be 16 with the weather the way it is!!!  Be sure to bundle up, drink plenty of sports drink to get your core temperature up and GET TOUGH!!  Just be safe, no slipping and if you are really, really cold, get inside!  It’s not worth risking your health.  You still have 35 days until the race, plenty of time to do a long run next weekend too (in lieu of the Marathon Simulation run on Feb 8.)

Hope that helps. Best of luck!! Coach Kastor.”

I think what got me was when he told me to GET TOUGH. That settled into my bones and I turned around my attitude. I also gave myself permission to cut it short if it got to be too much, but I kind of knew I wouldn’t do that unless one of my legs fell off. My plan was to do two 9 mile loops, then a short out and back to get to the 21 mile mark. Ken would join me for the first 9 miles.

We started out and it was 10 degrees. The sidewalks and roads were snow packed with some loose powder. About a mile in, the sun made an appearance and my outlook shifted once again. It was gorgeous:

We finished the first loop. Ken told me goodbye and said, “Be careful. Don’t slip on ice and fall in front of a car because that would ruin my Super Bowl.” So romantic. I took a break for a gel and fluid, then headed on out. Solo.

At ten miles I stopped at my favorite store to refill water and I did something I never do. I had gotten hungry and the gels weren’t doing the trick so I indulged:

Another amazing thing about my running pack is that it is big enough to carry donuts. Some days I am powered by donuts and it works very well for me. While buying the donuts a woman told me about how the butcher in this store had diagnosed her with celiac disease by looking at her face. People tell me the most random things.

I trudged on. I felt great. I loved seeing Ken and my footprints from the first loop. I thought it was cute. And, showed that no one else was out running today.

The strangest thing happened on this run. Through the entire thing, I just kept getting these zings of gratitude for my life. My life is not perfect, but there are a million things to be thankful for. I wasn’t even trying to have gratitude. I was just trying to get through the damn 21 miles. But the gratitude just showed up. I thought of Ken, my kids, my health, my parents, a steady job, a body that lets me train and race, the most amazing friends. All of it. I felt kind of like I was in a trance for those 21 miles.

When all was said and done, it took me 3:20.

For as much as I was dreading this run, it turned out to be one of the best long runs I’ve ever had. It showed me I can do hard things. It showed me I am stronger than I think I am. It showed me that things are rarely as bad or hard as we anticipate.

Coach Kastor’s response? “That's great!  Sounds like you ran tough. Go Broncos!”

On a side note, one thing that had been pissing off our entire household all weekend was that our satellite dish was covered with snow, making the cable not work. As the time got closer and closer to  Superbowl kickoff, we were panicking. We had offers to go watch at friend’s houses, but we wanted to be home. I came home from the run and Ken was about to get on the ladder and shoot de-icer at the satellite dish. He said that at least if he fell of the ladder he could watch the SB in the hospital. He makes me laugh. Guess that’s why we’ve been married almost 20 years.

Then…miracle of miracles…it came back on.

Now I’m off to make some wings and guacamole and chili. Got to replace 1,800 calories. Go Broncos!

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What’s the longest run you do in marathon training? I’ve only done 20s before, but this time I will do a 21 and a 22.

What are you doing for the SB? Who are you rooting for (maybe we can still be friends if you say the Seahawks).

SUAR