Family
Occupation
Recreation
Dreams
So, I'll tell you about some of these things tonight at happy hour and don't be offended if I don't ask you one f*cking thing about yourself. Because it's my blog, dammit.
If we were at happy hour together, I would tell you that running and I are having a true love affair lately. No, we don't make love in the middle of the trail, but we do connect and feel good together. Part of this is that I'm not forcing it - I'm just going with what feels good. It's not all perfect and it's not all fast, but it's working. This is me running. Because you've never seen a picture of me running before.
If we were on our second drink, I would tell you that I love doing hospice volunteer work, but this week it kind of got to me and I just didn't want to be with dying people. As much as it is uplifting to be with Heidi and to make someone feel better, the weight of everything kind of got me down. I know there will be weeks like this. Weeks where witnessing someone suffering in their last days and trying to comfort their loved ones who are watching them dying is just too much. This week was too much. I will take a break next week and come back ready to do the job and to move beyond my own discomfort. It truly is a privilege to be with people and their families in their last days, hours and moments. I hope the same grace will be given to me someday. Wow, that was heavy.
Speaking of taking a break...if we were at happy hour I would tell you I am going to Vegas tomorrow with my two dear friends, Clair and Erika, and there is no better therapy. Well, yes, running is therapy and so is wine -and then there is REAL therapy, but these two girls give me so much. We spoil ourselves staying in a nice suite at the Wynn, laying poolside drinking $20 gin coolers and losing way too much playing blackjack. And, it's one of my favorite times of the year.
On the High Roller above Vegas - 2015, Are my armpits hairy? |
If we were ordering a third round I'd tell you that I'm trying to read books because I love books, but I always fall asleep. Maybe I am old. Or maybe I spend too much time at happy hour. Recent books I've read, you ask? You - captivating, somewhat disturbing, When Breath Becomes Air - such a must read - a memoir. Just read it. The Under Ground Railroad - you can guess what this is about.
If we were finishing our third drink I would probably disclose to you that I've been reading through old journals of mine (like from 8th grade) and I am surprised I've turned out as well as I have. Sample (with my comments in red):
Jan. 18, 1980 (13 years old; almost 14)
"Hi! Have I got a lot to tell you! First - boys- I like Eugene (who names their kid Eugene?) and everyone was telling me he was gonna ask me (ask you what? Why you like him even though his name is Eugene?) which turned out o be a bunch of bullshit (wow, language) cause the next day he ignored me. But meanwhile Thad (we are Facebook friends now) has been giving me all these flattering comments like 'your hair looks good' (which it definitely did NOT look good - I've seen the pictures) which he never does to anyone. So I got the feeling he was gonna as me (ask me what? Where I get my hair cut?) The next day on the bus he came and sat by me and he told me once again my hair looked good (what's with the hair?) he said also he wasn't going to let me get off the bus but he did (I should have filed a restraining order). I know he's gonna ask me! Dammit! (language!)What the hell am I gonna say? I'm not at school today cause I have...ahem..diarrhea GROSS. (Some things definitely don't change)."
So basically when I was 13 going on 14 I was boy crazy, had great hair, had a trash mouth and had diarrhea. Hope that gives you some insight into a younger me.
Well, the bar is shutting down and I've got to go! Nice talking at you. Remember FORD.
Did you keep a journal when you were younger? Do you keep one now? I kept one diligently from the age of 8 (yes!) until about 35. I have volumes. But I don't keep one anymore
Favorite book you've read lately?
What's one thing you would tell me at happy hour?
Vegas - love or hate it?
SUAR