Tuesday, October 31, 2023

Are You A High Maintenance Runner?

It was snowing like a mother this weekend, so I did what any respectable lazy ass would do and scrolled social media. A college friend had posted something on Facebook to score "How High Maintenance Are You?." Naturally, I took the bait because I've  done all the Buzz Feed quizzes and I already know what kind of cheese I am (sharp cheddar). 

The friend who posted this said she scored 93. I scored 12. This score made me insecure. Do I not take care of myself enough? Do I smell? Why do they spell "allot" that way and have I been spelling it wrong my whole life? (BTW, I own 20+ pairs of shoes, highlight my hair and wear ((shitty, grocery store)) make up everyday).

25 scarves?

This got me to thinking. Maybe it's just that I'm low maintenance when it comes to body hair and heels (aren't they just for strippers?). Perhaps my special gift is being high maintenance in other areas! So, I created this. Now we are speaking my language.

Total Possible: 58

0-4: You are so low maintenance you basically are dead. But, good for you. You love running just for the bare bones of it.

4-20: You are semi high maintenance, but over all, quite sensible. You keep your costs low and focus on the act of running itself.

20-40: You are bordering on being very high maintenance and likely annoying to those around you, lol.

42-57: Definitely high maintenance. How do you live with yourself? 

58: You are insufferable and should re-evaluate all life choices. Maybe you should take up Pickleball. 

My score? 20 (wear make up to races, have recovery shoes that cost a lot ((allot)), have 10+ pairs of running shoes, sometimes blame outside circumstances for shitty performances).

By the way, none of this is judgey just meant for fun, so don't come at me!

Give me your scores! General high maintenance (first chart), runner high maintenance second chart. I'm 12/18. 

That was fun!



  1. Seems like having permanent makeup and laser hair removal would make you LESS high maintenance, but what do I know.
    My score on the first one is 6 (for laser hair removal--highly recommend!)
    10 on the running one ;)

    1. You definitely have a point with the permanent makeup and laser removal. I hadn't thought of it that way.

  2. I was a 4 on the first (own's 20+ shoes, but only if flip flops count). Otherwise I'm a 0. For the running, I'd say 12 (blame outside circumstances) and I took 6 for the bumper sticker. I don't have a bumper sticker, but I do have a 13.1 tattoo.

    1. OMG how did I forget tattoos??? That should probably be a +8 or so

  3. My score was 10🫣

  4. 10 for both. But being a guy, I'm not sure how that compares. (regular massage, and shoes stuff). Here and I went most of my life with only a couple pair of shoes. Start triathlon, and it got right out of hand there for a while. But even now, there are still 3 pairs of shoes that I once ran in, that are in regular rotation around the house, even though I haven't run since early 2020 or so.

  5. I scored 21 on the running high maintenance chart, but since Brooks sends me all these shoes, does it even count? It's a little embarrassing when the cleaning lady comes. I wonder what she thinks. And saying that just made me realize that having a cleaning lady makes me high maintenance. Even tho I only scored 11 on the high maintenance lady chart.

  6. Well Google won't let me sign in to comment. I scored 0 and 4. You probably thought it wasn't possible to score lower than you!

  7. This is a great post! I thought of a bunch of others:
    1) You run back and forth in from of your house/car until you hit an even number of miles +5
    2) You own more than 1 pair of supershoes/carbon plated shoes +10
    3.) You treat Strava like a diary +10
    4) No alcohol the night before a long run +5
    5) You change the bands of your GPS watch to match your outfit +7