Thursday, April 4, 2013

The Time I Did the Aztec Two-Step


Ocean Coral and Turquesa, Puerto Moreles, Mexico

Mexico was great, thanks for asking.

You probably didn’t even know I was gone.  Which breaks my heart.

I know you think the above picture is a professional image, but NO – I actually took it with my phone early one morning.

You see, at this lovely hotel (and it was lovely) you had to get up at the ass crack of dawn to reserve a chair at the beach and/or pool, so this was good picture taking time. The chair thing was very cut throat. I am lucky I get up early anyway, so it wasn’t an issue for me. But, let me tell you – if you were hung over or just someone who likes to sleep in – you were screwed in the chair department.

They actually had a security guard patrolling and if you left your towel unattended on a chair too long, he’d take it. I’m sure you could be dancing naked with a machine gun and smoking marijuana and that would not be an issue – but leave a towel on your chair too long unattended and you just might be thrown in a Mexican jail for years to come.

The stressors of vacationing, I tell ya!

It was a great trip. Our room was right on the beach, so I’d get up early and see this:



The resort had a jogging path (I preferred to call it a “running” path because I am not a JOGGER dammit) that went around the resort and along the beach. It was 1300 meters or just over .75 mile – so I’d do it 8 times or so, then call it good because by that time the humidity had almost killed me (I don’t know how you guys run in that).


This is not me

I’d pop over to the buffet and take a few chocolate croissants and some fruit. Then I’d lay around the rest of the day, maybe getting up to play some beach volleyball or lift my head to order another margarita. One day Emma and I walked to the town of Puerto Moreles (about 3 miles along the beach). Emma got a bit traumatized when we passed by a nude beach (it is this place if you ever want to go). I, on the other hand, was taking it all in because I don’t get out much and my subscription to Play Girl ran out.

Here is what we look like when we are relaxed and not bickering at each other (I think that sticker on the door means you’re not allowed to wear pants on the balcony):


This picture  makes me laugh because it looks like Emma had an eye lift.


My two main men:





18 years of marriage and we kind of still look like we like each other. Or, maybe that’s the tequila talking.


I only came home with two souvenirs. The first one is this shell which is at least as big as my head:


I found it on the beach. I am still expecting something to crawl out of it and scare the crap out of me.

My other souvenir is not really something I can show you – but some of you might have had it yourself at one time if you went to Mexico. I believe they call it Montezuma’s Revenge, but you can also call it the Aztec Two Step (which I prefer because it seems very cultured – “traveler’s diarrhea” just  doesn’t have the same ring to it). I think it’s nice to bring home a souvenir that just keeps on giving!!

Today was back to reality. I went to the gym to do 8 x 800s (Yassos). I almost died because the Aztec Two Step does not mix with 8 x 800s. I always lose count of my intervals, so I brought jelly beans and ate one after each 800 to keep track. It was a very sophisticated system and worked well.


Now it’s time to catch up on all the crap that didn’t happen while I was away…


Have you ever had food poisoning? I ask this because I always worry about it when we travel and eat at a bunch of buffets. I’ve never had food poisoning even once, believe it or not.

Do you exercise while on vacation? Yep, I always run – it’s a great way to see the town/resort/city where you are staying. And you can stuff your face a bit more than you normally would.



  1. Glad you enjoyed your vacation! Yes, I've had food poisoning. The absolute worst time was in Nicaragua. The PAIN is horrible, not to mention the simultaneous vomiting and diarrhea.

  2. Yes, yes I have. Coming home from 10 days in Costa Rica with my entire family, we had a layover in Dallas... a few of us ate at a BBQ place there in the airport. By the time we were taxi-ing (?) into SLC I was doing my strongest clench and praying that I wouldn't poo myself on the plane. I made it to a bathroom. But only just. And then every few hours after that, I was visiting the potty again. As was my husband and my mom.
    It was an incident that I would not like to repeat. But it's funny (but not really funny), that of all the times I've travelled out of the country (I think it's been 6-7 times), I've never had problems with the water (or whatever it is that they blame it on). But when eat at a McDonald's on a roadtrip, or pulled pork in the airport, I've got the runs.

  3. Looks beautiful/sounds relaxing--good for you! Sorry you had to deal with the runs--been there with Mexico. No fun at all.

    I always run on vacation for the exact reasons you mentioned.

  4. So love your way to keep track of the 800s. I had that same problem this morning when I couldn't remember how many I had done and was trying to calculate based on mileage while running on the treadmill at full speed...not a good idea. I have never done the Aztec Two Step fortunately.

  5. The best thing about a great vacation is you don't even need a professional photog to have great images :) not that I"m saying you aren't a pro. David LOVES when we go all inclusive, for him it means EAT, EAT, sit by water, EAT...dessert

  6. Am I the only one who sees Spiderman next to the cabana in the first photo?

    1. Hahahah!! You are so observant - we never really could figure out why Spider Man was there. Plus, he was quite well endowed. No joke.

  7. just like Whitney, I've never had a problem when in a foreign country. But eat pizza at the bowling ally or breakfast from Panera and I'm not sure which end to put over the toilet. I've had severe food poisoning once (to the point of IV fluids for dehydration) and a much more mild case another time. Both times have been the trash can in the lap, sit on the toilet and pray to die kind. Serious one lasted 2 days and took 2 weeks to recover from the havoc it did to me. The serious one, I literally crawled to the bathroom because the effort of trying to stand almost made me explode. Food poisoning is the worst.

  8. My food poisoning has always happened in the USA! Undercooked chicken at TGIFriday's that I thought was going to kill me and something at a Mexican restaurant that gave me the Aztec Two Step.

    After 3 months of living on Oahu, I am finally starting to adjust to the humidity, quite a change from arid So Cal!

    Looks like a great vacation! And yes, I run on vacation.

  9. Looks like a great trip! Welcome home.

    I have never had food poisoning, thank goodness. Sorry to hear you got sick! No fun.

    I have been on three vacations since I began running last year, and I ran on 2 of them. So... yes? =)

  10. Looks like a great time was had! The pictures are beautiful!


  11. "Yes" to both - as in just a few weeks ago. Our last day in Punta Cana was the day we picked up that dreaded Montozuma's Revenge...just in time to have to travel. It was so bad that I had to bring up our pictures to remind myself that 99% of the trip had been great. It just ended on a really sour note.

    Welcome home!

  12. You are funny!! Thanks for making me laugh!! Play Girl subscription, bahaha!!
    Anywho, never had food poisoning, and yes, I exercise on vacation. :)
    Great idea with the jelly beans!

  13. Looks like an amazing place.

  14. Ugh, I had food poisoning once and spent the night shivering in a steaming hot bath with the showerhead on, getting up to use the toilet for all kinds of things. Seriously, the worst. Glad it was only 24 hours.

    I hate running a path more than twice! I commend you for doing 8 loops! The hotel looks gorgeous. Glad you had fun!

  15. Yep - more food poisoning here then while I'm traveling. It reduces the stress of worrying about getting sick while on vacation.

  16. Looks like you guys had a marvelous trip! I love running on vacation too. Like you said, great way to see the area.

  17. You went to Mexico for Spring Break and I went to Colorado...I didn't pick up any Aztec Two Step but I did find a coyote skull and an elk antler on a hike :)

  18. Never had food poisoning to my knowledge. I did have a 24 hour bug one time, but not sure if it was related to something I ate or not. I do exercise on vacation, but it's usually just some light treadmill running. Treadmill running on a cruise ship can be pretty fun/interesting when the sea is not calm. It's kind of like reading a book when riding in a car. It makes you nauseous, but you don't want to stop!

  19. I had food poisoning once. Awful. And I had a roommate who described her bout with food poisoning as worse than when she had malaria. I haven't had malaria, but it sounds pretty bad...

    I love to run when I travel - though my traveling is generally for work, not vacation. But it is a lovely way to see where you are.

  20. I have had food poisoning, but as some have mentioned, not while traveling (though I've been to Mexico many times). My preferred way of going to Mexico, though, is to my parents' house (which they rent out) - we've done the all-inclusive thing, and hate having to fight over chairs. So much better to have a private beach where you can sit and quietly relax without hordes of people.

    I, too, love to run while traveling. Sometimes I travel just to run, and sometimes the amount of clothing I bring for running is almost as much as I bring for "other" wear, haha.

  21. No food poisoning here THANK GOD!!!!!! I always run on vacay. I would be a miserable beeotch for my companions if I didn't.

  22. That resort looks fabulous!! Looks like you had a great time.
    I always run and/or workout on vacation!
    Thankfully, I've never had food poisoning!
    I love your system of keeping track with the jelly beans!

  23. Yes I have had food poisoning - awful, felt like I was going to have to get better to die.
    Always get a couple of days of running in on vacation, we love Mexico we have been to Cabo San Lucas, Cancun and Cozumel. Looks like you had a good time.

  24. Ohhhhh, I was at that resort with my daughter and her best friend and her mom right after they graduated from HS three years ago! We had such a great time, and at the end of May the chair thing isn't nearly as competitive.

    And I always work out on vacation -- running is the easiest 'cause you can do it anywhere and it doesn't require much special equipment.

    Never had food poisoning, knock on wood... Hope you feel better soon!

  25. I have had food poisoning one time and it was the absolute worst thing ever. Mine was 24 hours of the worst flu ever (dual expulsion, with fever and chills together). After those 24 hours, I enjoyed another full day of horrible hangover like symptoms (feeling exhausted and not quite ready to eat again). It pretty much ruled. Good luck on continuing to avoid it.

    And the Jelly Beans idea is genius.

  26. Yes, I noticed. It broke my heart you were somewhere warm, while it snowed here. The beach photos only partially make up for this cruelty. But then you broke my heart again all over, when you said dancing naked with a machine gun, and didn't post photos. Sigh.

    Are you heart broke by the thought that Emma will soon be taller than you/

    Never had food poisoning, and hope never to. I've run on every vacation I've taken since I've started to run. Barefoot on the beach, warm and sunny, is the stuff of dreams. I may need to move.

  27. I agree with Keith. There was a lot of nekkid talk in this post with no accompanying photos. Just sayin'!
    Never had food poisoning, but lately all of my vacations have been on a cruise ship and they try to avoid that particular malady. I usually start off running when on a cruise, but by the end I'm pretty much sitting by the pool with an I.V. of pure sugar being dripped into my veins.

  28. Reading this entry has made me feel seriously jealous!

    There is a ton of rain here at the moment. There is certainly no blue skies to be seen out of my window.

    It looked beautiful in your pictures.

    I rather like that they removed the towels actually. Its a pain in those hotels where people "reserve" the sunbeds the night before. Everyone always ends up really cranky.

    Not much "bon-ommie" (or however you spell it!)

  29. Looks like a beautiful resort, and funny about the chairs. I went to Jamaica in 2012 and had that issue, had to get up super early to reserve them (but the security guards wouldn't take the towles off empty chairs which was part of the problem). Had food poisoning in 2010 and thought I would die. Had fish and chips at a restaurant and think the tartar sauce was bad...most sick I've ever been. Horrible. Never got sick on vacation in the Carribean though.

  30. What a beautiful resort, looks like fun! I have never had food poisonong, but did get the Montezuma's revenge after both trips to Mexico. I always run on vacation, so I can see some new sights. I'll be running in Sonoma, Ca. and San Francisco next month!

  31. Sushi food poisoning is hell on earth -

    And I ALWAYS run on vacation - it's the only time that is truly mine!

  32. The resort looks beautiful. It looks like the whole family had a great time. Sorry you brought back the "two step", not nice.

    And yes, now I am dreaming of a sandy beach and some sun. We've had nothing but rain (even a little snow) and cold. That beach looks perfect.

  33. Aztec two step when I was a kid in Cancun. This was a long time ago,before Cancun got real popular. I was a lot more careful about what I ate when I
    went back.

    I workout on vacations now. I find the gym or walk the beach before it's crowded. I agree with the previous post about the treadmill on a cruise ship, it can get interesting. The view from the treadmill was fabulous though.I even like the gym on vacation, I tend to meet some great people there.

  34. We went to Cancun in January. Flew home on a Monday and I had the stomach flu on Wednesday. Must have picked it up in that germy airport sitting around waiting for our flight on Monday! :(

  35. The views look absolutely beautiful. Your kids are growing up so fast! Your son looks almost as tall as the hubby!
    As for food poisoning - UGH! My husband and I think we got it when going to Disney this year. We ran the half marathon then within the hour, we were down. I was suppose to do the Goofy Challenge but there was no marathon for me the next day. We spent 4 days looking at the hotel walls from a view, bedside :(
    Hope your "revenge" clears up soon.

  36. I had food poisoning when I was home from college years ago, visiting my parents in Cedar Rapids, IA. Long story short, I ate a toxic chicken burrito which almost led to my early demise. It was horrible and painful but fortunately only lasted about a day.

    And yep, I always run on vacation! We just booked a hotel at Disney and I am more excited about the fact that they have a nice jogging path than I am about the proximity to the parks :)

  37. Looks like a FABULOUS vacation. I hope you are eating lots of probiotics to rid yourself of the Aztec business.

  38. OMG, I had food poisoning from a Panera catered lunch about 5 years ago. I was about 45 minutes from home, and willed myself not to get sick in the car. I did have a "courtesy bag" with just in case. As soon as I walked in my house, all bets were off. I have never been so sick in my life--both ends were busy. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I finally was able to eat at Panera this year--it took that long to get over the trauma. Ugh.

    Anyways...yes I run on vacation. I don't ever plan anything official, just go. This past spring break I really enjoyed running on the Florida island we stayed it. I don't run on the beach--too risky for injury.

    By the way, that jockeying for poolside chairs would be too stressful for me! Crazy!

  39. Okay, the view from your room was great and I LOVE that area but am I the only one that thinks food poisoning and the chair war don't make the best vacation?! You either have the most positive attitude ever, really enjoy family time or needed some sun. We took our little kids to cabo and every one got sick at same time except my father in law. It didn't last long but our kids were super cranky and I couldn't really enjoy the all-inclusive aspect. I think it has more to do with buffets and guests not washing hands than water.

    1. Well, it wasn't food poisoning - just a bit of an upset stomach when I got home. And, yes, the chair thing was annoying, but my attitude is that I am in Mexico, not working, sitting in the sun and with my family - I'm not going to let that little crap bother me or spoil my trip. No vacation is perfect (although I will say if we all got really sick that would suck). I do think it's about one's attitude.

  40. We just got back from a vacation in Florida and experienced the chair thing. I went out for a run around 7:30 AM (so yep I run on vacation and I always run the beach when I can - the breeze is awesome and chasing seagulls is fun too), and when I passed the pool I saw that all but 5 chairs had towels on them and no bodies to be found. Crazy. Fortunately - I am of the attitude that I came to the beach to play in the ocean and feel the sand... so I didn't have a real issue with the chairs other than making the mental scoff.

  41. Great idea on the jelly beans!! I should do that when we run intervals at that stupid park. It's like 400 circles around.

    That shell is awesome! I think I'd piss my pants if I found a shell that big.

    I got food poisoning at Hometown Buffet about 6 years ago. I almost died for 7 days. It was HORRIBLE. I've never been back.

  42. "...still expecting something to crawl out of it and scare the crap out of me"


    "...time to catch up on all the crap that didn’t happen while I was away"

    Seriously, am I the only one appreciating these hilarious puns!? :-)

  43. Amazing photos! I like very much. Thanks for this!

  44. Excellent content! Now we have left for your website each day I will point out any one does indeed a terrific recruitment divorce or separation solicitors Smyrna posting any one handed out. Most people have been impatient accurately. Now please click here Cash Advance I hope you would posting supplemental.