Thursday, June 6, 2013

A Story You Will Not Believe

We’ve all heard those stories about a girl going to her senior prom, thinking she has to use the bathroom (i.e., move her bowels) and then she shockingly has a baby. In the toilet. I questioned if these girls really did not know they were pregnant or if they just were in such baby denial that they ignored it, hoping the little fetus would somehow climb on out and go find another family to live with down the road.

Having been pregnant myself a few times I’ve NEVER understood, nor will I EVER understand how someone could not know they were pregnant. I felt pregnancy in every cell of my being. I  was so nauseous I carried Saltines and a grocery “barf” bag on the floor of my car for months. My bedtime became 6pm instead of 10pm because I was so tired I could barely eat a Saltine. Then there was that little thing called weight gain (as in 40 pounds) and such intense fetal kicking and hiccupping that I was sure my body had been taken over by an alien. And then the titty fairy arrived! Good gracious…Oh, and not to mention a teeny bit of growth in my mid-section:007

This leads me to tell you about the AYFK (Are you Freaking Kidding Me?) article I just read online.

It seems that a 33 year old woman, Trish, was training for Grandma’s Half Marathon in Minnesota. She went out for a two hour run on Sunday and had severe back pain following the run. The next day she ended up in the ER and – you guessed it – was 35 weeks pregnant. She had a 6 pound, 6 ounce baby girl the next day. She said she thought pregnancy was impossible because her husband had a vasectomy (awkward…)

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I’m sorry, I don’t want to be a cynic, but I just don’t get it. We all view life through our own lens of personal experience, and I cannot imagine training for a half marathon and not realizing I was carrying a 6 ½ pound baby along with me. Not even if I was the most constipated I had ever been in my entire life.

Let’s just hope she didn’t celebrate every training run by having several margaritas. You wonder what kind of crazy readings she would have gotten if she wore a heart rate monitor during training.

Thoughts?

How was pregnancy for you? Can you imagine NOT knowing you were pregnant?

For those of you who ran throughout your pregnancy (I did not – I wasn’t a runner back then) how different did you feel at the start vs. the end of pregnancy?

SUAR

74 comments:

  1. I will never understand this and I almost want to call bullshit on every single one of them. But then I feel bad because maybe they really dont know their body that much?! I dont know.

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  2. If I were that husband I'd be getting a DNA test, stat.

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    1. Is there an emoticon for that eye to eye gesture? Cuz that's what I'm doing to my computer screen right now. Gotta wonder,right?

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  3. I read this story this morning and started a very large discussion on my facebook. I don't get it either. Somebody pointed out that her neighbor had this happen and she had some condition where the placenta and sac did not expand? But then where is the baby growing? I was HUGE at 35 weeks with both kids and they were in training for the US gymnastics team in there. I certainly could not run 9 frackin' miles. Also, her husband is clearly thinking the kid is not his because he said she IS running that damn half in a couple weeks because "they cashed the check". LOL

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  4. I knew I was pregnant the moment it happened. Suddenly 2 miles felt like 10 miles and 10 miles felt impossible and stupid. I did manage to run (waddle?) all 39 weeks and 6 days my son was in there, but it wasn't pretty. I felt exhausted at the beginning, then as my energy came back my weight went up...so I was screwed either way. Hah.

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  5. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought "are you freaking kidding me?!?!" It's one thing to not know you were a few weeks pregnant, but 35?? I don't buy it.

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  6. I can only think that some women must be REALLY out of tune with their bodies. Maybe, unlike me (and every runner I know!) they don't question weird twinges, strange pains, etc.??? And really, the body-wave of a full-term baby moving around -- she didn't even feel that, or touch her belly, and think, "Whoa, elbow"?!? Nope, I don't get it either!

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  7. I don't get it either. I've birthed 3 kids and each time I knew I was pregnant.

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  8. I don't get it either. With my first, the placenta was in front, so my feeling of her movement was reduced until after 20+ weeks, but you know how when you get farther along and you see their arm or foot push OUT from your belly? What did she think that was?! Plus, I was so tired my first trimester (and nauseous) that had I not known I was pregnant, I would have been certain I was dying.

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  9. Husband had a vasectomy. Lucy, you have some 'splaining to do! Can you spell denial?

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  10. Nope, it's b.s. They're in total denial. I knew it all 3 times with every cell of my being.

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  11. Very interesting UK article here on Vasectomies... http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/sex_relationships/facts/sterilisation_men.htm

    They are not 100% effective 100% of the time...doh!

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  12. There has to be SOME level of denial involved: Even when you think you are done having kids do you not pee on a stick just in case, when you are two days late? Or maybe that's just just me. LOL

    Plus, she'd had kids before but couldn't tell that her "back pain" was possibly like labor? She told the press "I didn't know what was going on."


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  13. I think it's b.s. I know some women don't get whale-like, like I do, but there are so many other signs. How can you really not know?

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  14. Yeah, same here, I just don't understand how a woman could not know she's pregnant! And this woman had already been there twice so by then you kinda get to know the signs. Does not make sense. I say it's denial. Which as we all know works so well because if you just wish something away, that's what happens.

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  15. I am currently 7 months pregnant and have NO idea how you could not know. I ran a 1/2 marathon when I was 9 weeks along and could have fallen asleep on the side of the road I was so damn tired. And now?? I can't run without peeing my pants so I do a lot of waddling around instead.

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    1. OMG, I forgot about the whole peeing my pants stage until you mentioned it.

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  16. I don't get it either, but I do know a friend of my cousin who was young and had this happen. There actually are pics of her in a bikini at like 7 months pg and she does not look pregnant! And she was always a tiny girl, so I don't know, I don't get it but I can see it once in awhile by some freak of nature!!

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  17. Crazy, insane story!! My husband had a vasectomy, too, so I can see where I would never think I was pregnant again (assuming I wasn't stepping out on him!!) Maybe if you really aren't thinking of pregnancy at all, some of the signs/symptoms can be more easily explained away or not as noticeable??

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  18. I was getting worried and was about to quit training for a marathon cuz I figured that training CAUSED this!!! How else can you 'splain it if the hubs had a vasectomy???

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  19. I just gotta post on the vasectomy comments.....my husband had a vasectomy, only for 1 year later to find out reversed. He had to go in and have it all redone again :0/ That time they put him out and took a section of his vas out instead of snipping and "sealing"

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  20. unless you were obese, I cannot understand at all how you wouldn't know you were pregnant. 3 times for me and I knew each time as well. Sick, big boobs, ginormous belly, baby moving everywhere. There is just no way I wouldn't know. Liars. The lot of them.

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  21. Went for a two-hour run and then delivered a baby? I'd like to see Chuck Norris do THAT.

    Seriously, it would be nice to focus on the healthy baby and the resilience of the runner mom, rather than suggesting she's a liar or an idiot. She's one of us-- if we don't have her back, who does?

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    1. I love your comment, and I second it. let's stick together. and yeah, she has seriously raised the bar for Chuck Norris.

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    2. As I said above, I'm just saying what's true for me, given my experiences. I don't recall saying she was a liar or an idiot...

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  22. I saw this on Yahoo and I was flabbergasted! I've never been pregnant, but I can't imagine not figuring it out at some point. I guess maybe if she carried small? And had the easiest, most "symptom" free pregnancy ever?

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  23. There is no way she is one of us!! She didn't have her period for over 9 months and wasn't suspicious? HELLO!!!!! That baby had no prenatal care!!! She has some explaining to do.

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  24. I'm so glad you admitted to gaining 40 pounds during pregnancy! I gained 50! (And I'm only 5'2" tall) Strangers in gas stations would come up to lay hands on my gargantuan belly. You could roll me like a ball.

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  25. Yikes. I am 37 weeks pregnant currently and did my last 5k at 30 weeks....now I walk. There is NO way I would not know I was pregnant....even if I couldn't figure it out myself all the comments of "OMG YOU ARE HUGE" would have clued me in :P

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  26. Bahaha I read this story online today! How could you NOT know you were preggo!!! The whole thing blew my mind.

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  27. Sorry but like you I don't buy it. When I was pg, it took every ounce of energy just to get myself out the door to go to work. I couldn't muster up enough energy to run. Plus, I felt life in my abdomen...punching and kicking; ..all symptoms you just could not ignore. I too gained 40# with each pg; my boobs were DD...need I say more?

    Denial is powerful.

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  28. I didn't know for the first 4 months of my pregnancy. I have PCOS and didn't get my period regularly at the time (pretty much not at all), I was told I would need medical help getting pregnant. I did notice I would get tired very early into my runs and extremely hungry! I didn't find out till had blood work done for something else. At 4 months I hadn't really gained any weight but by 5-6 months I'm sure I would have figured it out lol.

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  29. Had morning (noon and night) sickness for all 9 months. The smell of saltines would send me barfing. I was tired a lot, but also had raging insomnia (more with my 2nd than 1st pg). I lost a lot of weight with the barfing (and just eating healthier) and didn't wear maternity clothes until fairly late in my pg (though had plenty of "fat" clothes as I was a "fat girl" in those days). Had contractions at 27 weeks with #1 and spent 10 weeks on bedrest. Worked up through the last Friday before birth on Sunday with #2. Seriously swelling of feet with #1, but not #2. Hard to imagine not knowing. But my stepsis swears she didn't know with #1 - even going to the doctor for leg swelling and they didn't run a pg test. She continued to have monthly bleeding so she though it was her period and thought that meant she wasn't pg. Her daughter is now 26!

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  30. I've watched those crazy tv shows about women having babies without knowing they are pregnant. I mean I havent had a child, but just from common sense, really?! How do you not know? Unless they have some gift that I am not aware of, I call BS.

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  31. I'm currently 33 weeks pregnant and I'm the size of a bus. I'm quite cynical as well and I wish I could have kept up my running. Totally get the alien in the belly thing!

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  32. Yeah, I don't understand either because no periods. Hello?! And the morning sickness, and the belly, and the womb yoga (maybe that was just my kids). I'm with you. There was no denying what I was carrying around.

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  33. I didn't know I was pregnant until I was 3 months along with my first child. I only found out because I had trouble with my asthma and before my doctor prescribed steroids he did a pregnancy test. I could have conceivably gone another couple of months before realizing it. I had no morning sickness and I was lucky to have 3 periods a year at the time. But I know I would have realized it by the 6th month at the very latest. I had VERY active babies to the point where their movements were painful at times. But I still loved it!

    So anything past 6 months has got to be denial.

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  34. I will post on the belly size plus symptoms. With both of my kids I barely gained weight (10 lbs with the first, 12 with the second - and they were normal babies. All the weight was them, water and placenta). Though my belly was good size when measured it didn't look big at all because my hips' bones accommodated it in a way that didn't look like a pregnant belly. I will never forget when I was 8 months pregnant (my second) a girl told me: "that shirt makes a weird wave on your belly". I responded: "I am 8 months pregnant." She couldn't believe it. Nobody could. I was never nauseated or had any type of craving. So if a quiet baby and you have a perfect pregnancy (like both of mine), and no considerable weight (10 lbs, seriously?) those particular signs can be missed. Now, I KNEW I was pregnant. I don't know if there was ignorance in the story of this runner or denial because the husband had a vasectomy, or who knows......

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    1. As someone who gained 60+ lbs with my one and only pregnancy, I am so jealous! My son it 8 and I still have ten lbs to go to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight.

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  35. Ok, ok ... living in Minnesota myself, my only thought is... we did have a late winter. Perhaps she froze all the nerves in her abdominal area during her training runs and couldn't feel the kicking? I mean, I guess... we finally thawed out last week, so maybe she still didn't gain feeling back yet? *wink*

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  36. you forgot the constant need to pee when pregnant. How could anyone run a half marathon? Your times would be crap because of the 25 bathroom breaks

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  37. Funny I was just going to write a post on this. I'm 30 weeks pregnant with #2 and I agree, there is no way I would not know I was pregnant. Movement alone is enough to remind me constantly. I know some women have anterior placentas, but still, you feel movement at some point. I feel like there was some serious denial here and her husband probably should have gone back to make sure he was just shooting blanks after his vasectomy.

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  38. I don't buy any of these stories. None of them. You can't tell me none of these women (even if it is 1 in 2500) don;t feel that kick in the ribs at 3am. Nope, you're nuts. And this was not her first baby so I call further BS on her.

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  39. Yeah, I'm with you. Unless you are monstrously obese, then maybe you always feel pregnant, exhausted, etc, and even then I'd still think you would feel at least somewhat different...

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  40. This woman believed that she couldn't get pregnant and she was under the stress of training for a half marathon. So she probably used training to explain away a lot of things (fatigue, little weight gain because perhaps she was simultaneously losing weight from running, indigestion, irregular period, etc). Still, there had to be some level of denial going on. I guess this is proof that the mind is pretty strong and can convince us of most anything.

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  41. As a man, this is clearly a difficult topic for weigh in on. But I suspect that these stories are always somewhere between genuine ignorance and the true power of denial. I obviously don’t track these stories, but I have never heard one of these types of stories coming from a higher educated, comfortable socioeconomic household. I’m sure there are some cases of poorly educated young women having so little understanding of her body that they remain unaware for a certain amount of time and are then able to misdiagnose any symptoms for a bit. But after so many months of missing her monthly and experiencing the clear signs that “something” is happening, the denial part kicks in. It’s a crazy world. People react very oddly to desperate situations.

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    1. My friend's mom, who is highly educated, didn't realize she was pregnant with her third son. It was a family secret that they didn't know until he popped out (he doesn't even know, his parent's didn't know and my friend only found out from a family friend who didn't realize that it was a secret). She did admit that there was some denial going on (they were young and already had two young children and were both social workers); however, she didn't really have a difficult pregnancy and didn't really gain any weight.

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    2. I didn't mean to make any gross generalizations. I hope it didn't come across that way. Anything is possible. And now I can no longer say that I haven't heard of this type of situation coming from an educated and comfortable household. Thanks. It's still a crazy world. I'm glad your friend's mom and her third son did so well and are healthy.

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    3. Crazy story - my pediatrician and his wife tried for years to have a baby and were told they couldn't get pregnant. She was 6 1/2 month pregnant before she realized that was why she was so tired. It really can happen to anyone - if you think there is no way that pregnancy can be causing your symptoms then your mind comes up with other explanations! I, on the other hand, have taken like 4 pregnancy tests since my husbands v-day - ya know, just in case my weight gain has a cause other then sloth!

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    4. Haha. You're wise to take those test. One of my best friends and his wife had their 4th child last year...post v-day. They were naturally surprised. After reading some of these posts, I'm starting to wonder just how reliable a vasectomy really is.

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  42. I don't get it either. I am short-waisted, and by the time I was 35 weeks with one <7 lb baby, I looked like I was having triplets. I have NO idea how someone could NOT know.

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  43. I think biology plays a huge role in your feeling of pregnancy. Some are just aren't that sensitive

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  44. Many woman have irregular periods and/or are overweight and just cannot tell.

    I actually know of someone who only learned at the start of her 3rd trimester that she was pregnant.

    Crazy!

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  45. While I'm not a mother so have no experience with this, I find it awfully hard to believe you wouldn't know. I can feel a burrito that I ate the day before on the run - let alone a baby. I hope the child is ok. And I'm with you on the awkward part about her husband, maybe that's why she was in such denial.

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  46. When I saw this yesterday morning, I thought of your blog...I knew you'd get to it. I'm thinking it's got to be denial with the vasectomy angle...maybe for a couple of reasons there....still a crazy story any way you slice it.

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  47. I new right way with 1st because of the peeing, tireness, and achy boobs. With my second I would have swore I was going to get my period any day. When it didn't arrive after a week I immediately peed on the stick and surprise. I didn't experience the peeing, tireness and achy boobs with my daughter. I think maybe my body wasn't protesting against pregancy so much since I had experienced it once before. Maybe it was because I had a toddler to keep up with and mother nature knows mom needs that energy to manage both growing a baby and keep up with one on the move and adjusts accordingly.

    I experience irregular periods when exercising a lot (I'm not sure why), so maybe if she's training her period could have been irregular. If she had kids before maybe the normal pregnancy sypmtoms weren't as noticible, as I experienced with my second.

    I walked/waddled a 5k when 7 month pregnant with my daughter. I pushed my son in the stroller and all the people watching on the sideline thought I was about to go into labor. I had to make a pit stop at the park to pee at the 1/2 way point. Needless to say I was dead last in this race and I evenually just got on the sidewalk and acted like pedestrian out for a stroll. So if she really ran 2 hours that far along in her pregancy I'm impressed. She did show Chuck Norris what for.

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  48. My hubby is a urologist who does vasectomies - the guys are supposed to bring in a semen sample a few weeks after the procedure to check that nothing grew back together, because that does happen now and again. Of course, lots of patients don't bother and think they're good to go... and then, surprise! Eek.

    Also, my now-50-year-old sister-in-law was one of those "I didn't know! I just thought I had a really bad stomach ache!" 17-year-olds (I didn't know her then) and she plopped out her baby in the bathtub. For real! She sticks to that story to this day - all I know is SHE believes that story.

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  49. When I went into labor and got to hospital with Baby 1, I was 8cm and 90% effaced and hardly felt a thing. With Baby 2 the nurse kept asking if I felt ok. When I questioned her why she kept asking, she said I was having huge contractions almost right on top of each other. Again, I hardly felt anything. So I can slightly see how, with a small baby that not knowing could be possible. But both my kids were so active during the pregnancies I don't fully understand how you couldn't know.

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  50. In the spirit of running in the news, I'm passing along a nugget from my little hood West Seattle, WA....

    http://westseattleblog.com/2013/06/west-seattle-crime-watch-runner-chases-catches-would-be-thief#comment-1033898

    make sure you check out the design for the t-shirt

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    1. Now that's a kick ass runner! Don't know if I would have had the guts to do that.

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    2. I laughed out loud at the I was planning to do 6 miles, but I can do 12 if I need to!! That guy didn't have a clue.

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  51. I saw this too and could NOT believe it! She also said she didn't miss any periods! Wow, crazy crazy stories! I just hope the baby is healthy and that the couple is ready to take care of the baby!

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  52. My hairdressers niece didn't know she was pregnant until the big day. She's a bigger girl so she didnt notice any weight gain and while is super nice she is a little simple so I can see her not clueing in.

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  53. My hairdressers niece didn't know she was pregnant until the big day. She's a bigger girl so she didnt notice any weight gain and while is super nice she is a little simple so I can see her not clueing in.

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  54. That does seem a little odd that she didn't realize that she was pregnant, (and I never have been so I wouldn't know) but if she didn't get morning sick and thought she was just gaining weight and didn't think she could get pregnant, well maybe it is true. Or she just didn't want to admit it to herself or anyone

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  55. Man, I was the size of a boat with my second pregnancy, by week 8. Of course I was pregnant with twins.

    Maybe this chick really didn't know, but I feel sorry for the kid. 35 weeks is premature... and 6 pounds is fairly little. Poor baby!

    My twins weighed 7 lbs 1 oz and 6 lbs 14 oz... they were 39.5 weekers. I ran with them up until week 24, then I swam and walked, and at week 37 I started running again (I wanted them out). Two weeks post partum, I ran an 8 minute mile and was able to run 5 miles again by their first MONTH birthday. Now I am that crazy Mom with three children ages 1 and 4, pushing a jog stroller... and fit as all get out! :)

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  56. I knew I was pregnant, I had the large breasts and the extreme tiredness. But movement was minimal, both my kids were mellow womb potatoes ;-)

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  57. I had the exact same reaction when I read the story. I had incredibly easy pregnancies but I still knew, there is no way I couldn't have known. I was exhausted and even though I gained less than 20 pounds, I had a huge belly. I can't imagine running that distance without realizing something was going on.

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