Saturday, June 29, 2013

It Will Be Like 4 Months Of PMS

I did it. I hired a coach for Ironman Florida. I need someone to boss me around and assure me I can actually do this thing in 4 months. I also do not have the time to plan out my weekly workouts right now. Truth be told, I was having kind of a breakdown trying to figure it out. I think it will be money very well spent.

Oh, and she’s not just any coach, but a coach who said she could teach me how to pee on the bike. My kind of lady (yes, ladies do pee on the bike).  I mean, why get off the bike when you can just let it flow right then and there? I will draw the line at #2, however.

Meet Carole Sharpless (or “Sharpie” as some call her – like the pen).

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I think she might know just a couple of things about the sport of triathlon because she is a pro-triathlete who was 1st place for pros at 2010 Ironman Florida and has a whole other huge list of amazing triathlete accomplishments.   She does both virtual and local coaching for all distances. I think she is going to be a terrific fit for me.

When we met yesterday, she made a few things clear:

  • I am the best person she has ever met or coached (I made that up, but she was probably thinking it)
  • I need to “get my ass in the pool” and start swimming (Yes, these were her exact words. I have successfully blown off swimming for a very long time and cannot get away with it anymore)
  • I will be baptized by fire since I don’t have much time to train. This weekend alone I will do 7 hours and 40 minutes of workouts in two days. Huh?
  • I need to eat/drink 250 calories per hour on the bike. That means stuffing my jersey with all kinds of crap.

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Pretty soon I will have my X2PERFORMANCE gear to wear. Cannot wait to show you!

  • I will be doing many, many TITS (“Time In The Saddle”) rides keeping my heart rate at 134. Shoot. I thought TITS rides would mean topless rides. I guess I could do topless TITS rides if I wanted.
  • My rest days will be MAJOR rest days. Coach Sharpie will ask me the plot line for the book I read or the movie I watched while laying on the couch not moving. Guess I need to buy some Cliff Notes.
  • I will be tired, irritable, cranky and delirious. Kind of like 4 months of PMS. I’m sure my family is thrilled.

So, what else was there to do but get up at 6:30 a.m. this morning and head out for a 3 hour ride? It was NOT easy keeping my heart rate that low because I really like to HAMMER on the bike. I hated, hated being passed by all those folks singing “on your left” as they smirked and flew by. I wanted to yell, “I am HEART RATE training. I could go faster if I wanted!” God, what egos we have. But, I know the Ironman is all about endurance and these long aerobic rides are essential.

Last night we had a HUGE storm that went on forever. We got to a place in Lyons, CO where the streets were covered in tree branches. Kind of pretty actually. Funny how you can enjoy workouts more when you can actually breathe, talk and take in the scenery.

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I jumped off the bike (about 43 miles total) and transitioned for the run. Heidi came along, but she said I made her a bit too tired, even with the stop to lay down in the river.

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3 hours, 30 minutes of training done all before the kids got up. I felt like super mom just for a second. Until I felt tired and yelled at someone.

Tomorrow will be a 4 hour ride followed by a quick 10 minute run to shake out my legs.

You people who have done Ironmans (or should I say “have done Ironmen?” That sounds dirty) in the past are CRAZY. This shit is crazy.

What’s your favorite thing to eat while cycling?

Have you ever worked with a coach? What were the positives and negatives?

SUAR

40 comments:

  1. Not an Ironman here (and no desire) - but good luck!!! I think having a coach will help free your mind to just focus on doing what someone else tells you to do!!

    I love the caption by Heidi - too funny!!

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  2. I used a coach for swimming. I had done sprint tri's in the past and could swim EXACTLY 300y. When at my first tri the guy doing maintenance on the pool mentioned it was 300m, I got pissed. THE WEBSITE SAID 300 YARDS. Talk about a miserable first tri.
    So after about 4 years I decided to get myself back into the sprint tri's and got in the pool with a coach. I actually swam a mile the 2nd time back in the pool. A MILE!!! (with rests after 300's and 500's).
    You've got this but hate to tell you….. YOU HAVE TO GET YOUR ASS IN THE POOL.

    I'm too afraid of open water. I have no IDEA how you have the balls to do it.

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  3. Both Ironman races I've done I had a coach. It was WAY too much for me to try to figure out on my own. My fave thing to eat while cycling used to be clif bars, then I started to make my own bars. Hell yeah. My fave are my peanut butter and banana amazeballs. :)
    4 months of PMS, ha ha ha ha ha...that's about right.

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    1. Oh and FYI, peeing on the bike is no easy feat. It's all about staying relaxed. :)

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    2. Can I please have that recipe?

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    3. I would love to say that I eat amazeballs. Because you are what you eat, right?

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    4. I would like recipe to amazeballs too

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  4. I have a running coach! She is absolutely wonderful and told me, ever so sweetly, today that I can no longer whine and cut my runs short. None of my running buddies would say that. They're all like "nah, we're good! Lets eat some ice cream!" A coach for me means accountability, which I desperately need.
    And pee on the bike? Love. It.

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  5. You rock. I can't wait to follow you during this 4 months and the training. I just ran my first 1/2, and this summer I'm spending a lot of time on the bike. I'm so interested in your progress, EVERYTHING, the hard days, the good days, what you eat, how much you sleep.....how much water you drink. SHARE EVERYTHING because we want to know. And I need to know about peeing on the bike, please.
    kelly in michigan

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  6. Not a coach, but I started working with a trainer! After 20 years of running, the wear and tear is starting to take control. I need to address some bio mechanical issues if I want to keep running. Actually, If I want to keep walking! Funny thing tho, when I told my podiatrist about it, he basically fired me. That, after ripping on all the things she's having me do. Which seem to be helping. (Sigh). Not a team player, clearly.

    But enough about me! Good luck, your coach sounds hardcore and for that reason alone, you will be an Ironman! So jealous....

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  7. WOW, that is some impressive training! I am in awe of anyone who does Ironmen (so dirty!)!

    I just started working with a running coach at the beginning of June and have already seen some progress, so I definitely think it's a positive move. It's good to have someone plan out workouts and hold you accountable to them! I was doing okay on my own, but not really making any progress. Glad to have someone just tell me what to do while I reap the benefits :)

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  8. I will never be the runner or competitor that you are, but you are super-inspiring to me! I never fail to LAUGH OUT LOUD every time I read your blog. Looking forward to hearing about the Ironman/woman training.

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  9. Did IMC. I ate lots of Clif's bars while riding, which astonished my coach. Solids on the bike astonish her in general. Fig or date Newtons were surprisingly good on the bike, and surprisingly bad on the run. Gu, and Gu-like substances are very much a personal thing. I did them for a while, and nearly threw up the last one on the run. Save it for the race, and you'll know when it's time - eat the chicken soup. It saved me and many others.

    The biggest thing your coach will help you with is when you've done enough. It's really easy to get into the "gotta do more, GOTTA DO MORE!!" thought pattern, and there is indeed time to rest. With your feet up. Wearing compression pants.

    Peeing on the bike is much easier for girls. You build up a head of pressure much sooner. Just make sure no one is right behind you, and Bob's your uncle. If pee is the ickiest thing your skin feels throughout your IM experience, you are very, very lucky. Everybody draws the line at #2.

    The 250 calories per hour on the bike can be tougher than it sounds. Many people have to get some or most of them in liquid form. I have a sports drink recipe I can share with you, or you can find it on my blog in about 30 seconds. All natural ingredients, and it works awesome. Figure out if Nuun works for you for electrolyes. Some people get gas from it. Find something, you're going to need it for IMF, big time. Find an alternate in case it stops working for you.

    Topless rides are all very well, and an innovative way of avoiding nipple chafe. Just don't forget the sun screen, especially that spot across your tail bone. I was swimming with a buddy that forgot, and she got a flat, and ended up with a second degree burn there, and let's just say life was hell for her. Tug all clothing up and down a bit when applying sunscreen. Sunscreen is cheap, apply lots. More.

    Letting people sail past you is good training. Get used to it. For most of us, if people aren't passing us on the bike, we're going too fast. That extra speed at the start of the bike will come back to bite your ass, and legs and feet and everything else during the run. Find your pace and stick to it. No matter how cute the pace booty is.

    This is just the start Beth. Start catching up on your sleep. If either of your kids has a birthday between now and IMF, write the card, buy the gift, and do the party now. If Ken hasn't figured it out, he needs to know he isn't getting any till about a week after the race at best, unless he's got a thing about unconscious women. You'll just think it's sore sit bones from the last ride, so I guess that's all good then.

    In a few weeks, some of the Xtra Normal videos aren't going to be mysterious anymore. You'll be living them.


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  10. Shut the F$@K up. You are doing IMFL?!?!?!?! I have been away from the computer far too long (Damn IMFL Training!) How did I miss this announcement. Oh yea that is right, I will be right there with you!
    I'm beyond excited!

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  11. IM without a coach versus IM with a coach- five min. difference.
    Peeing on the bike is easy but you do stink afterwards a bit. Don't wear socks.

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    1. Highly disagree. An IM with the wrong coach won't make much difference, but with the right coach exceptional gains can be made. My first IM did a 14:31. It was fine. The next year I repeated the IM this time with a coach. I finished in 12:11. Sure, I was stronger year #2 but still. His guidance and expertise helped me hone in on the important tools I was missing. Over a 2 hour PR? Come on. That's not just the athlete.

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    2. For me it has absolutely nothing to do with a time goal and everything to do with someone helping me to get to the start line healthy and to execute a smart race. Time isn't everything you know.

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    3. Just sharing my experience-guess i had Mr. WRONG for my coach then.
      Direct me then to Mr. or Ms. RIGHT cause I am going to do another one soon. thanks!

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  12. Holy wow!!!!
    very excited to follow you along this journey! and yes,please share everything!!!!
    oh,and you should TOTALLY make your own shirt for bike riding to wear on your heart rate training days, a pink shirt with neon letters that say "“I am HEART RATE training. I could go faster if I wanted!”
    i remember when i started running 5ks a few weeks after i had my last 2 babies,and i would have given anything for a shirt that said
    ' im not slow,i just had a baby 3(5)(6)(8) weeks ago!"
    anyways,enjoy your weekend of workouts!!!

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  13. Well, I am already an (unwilling) expert at the pee while running thing, so I'm sure a bike would be a piece of cake. However - I haven't swam in 30-ish years, and I don't intend to start...ever. So I will live vicariously through you. This is gonna be fun!!

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  14. Chili cheese fritos on the bike! I have them in transition always...:)

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  15. That sounds really serious! I'm sure it will be a success. Though I'm grossed out about the peeing thing!

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  16. Saved you the trouble of looking it up, since someone else asked for it. Make 1 litre hot lemon tea. I use Celestial Seasoning Lemon Zinger.
    Add 4 tsp honey
    Add 1/4 tsp sea salt. (I actually use about half this)
    Let cool a bit, then add a glug of orange juice to taste. They say 8 tsp.

    I like to refrigerate it overnight before a long ride. It has a nice clean clear taste, and best of all, it's practically free! Even better for my peace of mind, I can pronounce all the ingredients. I suppose if you wanted you could stir in some protien or electrote powder. I've put Nuun in, and that works just fine. I'll tweak the ingredients to taste, or to suit the ride, or weather, sometimes with more honey or salt.

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  17. Haha.. I love comparison of hard training cycles to PMS. My other half will totally appreciate it. He just thinks I'm nuts.

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  18. I'm kind of scared for you. Just kidding. I'm looking forward to reading about your training. I know it will be inspirational as always!

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  19. Check out the blog Twenty Six And Then Some...a girl named Paige takes you through two Ironman's...her latest just a few weeks ago. Sweet girl, I'm sure she'd be happy to give advice, support etc etc

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    1. Yes, I do read Page's blog. Loved her recap from IM Coeur d'Alene. Very inspiring!

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  20. I feel like my coach keeps me accountable, and reminds me not to be so hard on myself sometimes. Other times, I wish she'd yell at me. LOL

    Heidi is so cute. Seriously, stop posting pictures of her, it makes my heart all weepy. So cute!

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  21. It sounds like it is going to be a crazy but completely rewarding 4 months!!

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  22. If you prefer to not eat/chew while cycling, try Hammer Nutrition's Perpetuem (http://www.hammernutrition.com/products/perpetuem.pp.html?navcat=fuels-energy-drinks.) It has about 250 calories per serving, you just mix it with water and drink it. My husband used it exclusively last month when he rode up Haleakala Crater on Maui and I have used it during marathons.

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  23. I have tried GU because that is what they have at races. It's pretty easy to eat while you are running or riding. I prefer shot blox but they stick to your teeth. I am actually really excited to try the recipes in the cookbook I just received: Feed Zone Portables from Skratch Labs. If you order it off their website they throw in a free pound of their hydration mix which doesn't have anything you can't pronounce in it and does contain more and better electrolytes than the stuff that turns pee blue. Speaking of pee, I hope you pass on (pun intended) all those tips for peeing on the bike so we can benefit from all you are learning :)

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    1. There is something that turns your pee blue? For real? Ewwww!

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  24. Peanut butter GU is good (like a tablespoon of peanut butter) but sometimes I will roll up a tortilla smeared with Nutella or peanut butter, or sometimes both because I'm kind of a bad ass, and I will cut it into bit size pieces. Word of warning though to put it in a baggie in your jersey or bento box (you should get a bento if you don't have one already - way easier to transport and access food, salt pills, etc) because if it's hot it will get messy.

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  25. I have a running coach and love it - He keeps me accountable and has pushed me way out of my comfort zone! Good luck with your training!

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  26. All I can say is you rock. I am glad that you talked about hiring a coach. My trainer just left for the states. I am considering hiring a running coach for my first marathon what do you think ?. I am two weeks into Hal Higdons Novice 1 Training program. If you have any other advice please let me know. Thanks and wishing you the best....

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  27. "have done Ironmen" haha! You are my favorite!

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  28. Good luck! I had a coach and it really helped!

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  29. Hey Bethie...
    Popped over because I was curious if you had hired a coach yet. You'll have to email the details about your Sharpie coach, I'd be interested in a full maybe next year (did I just say that out loud???).

    You're ROCKING the training - awesome! Let's get together and go for a run after Leadville's over. Maybe a couple weeks after Leadville, when I can walk again. Email me and give me the coach scoop and what decision lead you to her.

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  30. Go NOW and get yourself some Amrita bars - they are awesome for the bike. Just open a couple of bars and break them into pieces - throw them in a ziploc and into your bento box and you are ready to go. Oh, and get yourself some Salt Stick capsules, too. amazing for training in the heat and humidity.

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