Thursday, July 29, 2010

Crazies in Vegas

Vegas is never boring. It may be sinful and outrageous and explicit and indulgent, but never boring.  I think this is because people who visit there take liberties they would never take in their normal lives.  Case in point:

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Well, I hope she wouldn’t wear these in her normal life.

One walk done the Strip and you’re inundated by the sights and strange, awful smells.

You have strangers jumping into your photo ops. This is not my grandpa. He just wanted to be in the shot or hit on me. Not sure which.

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You have men dressed in pink who say they want a photo with you, then they charge you money that you have to pay or you might get “offed” and shoved in someone’s trunk for dead:

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You have Hangover wannabes:

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And  have dudes who wear angry shirts:

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You have star crossed lovers enjoying margaritas on their 15th wedding anniversary. Collective “awww…” from the blog world.

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And then, just when you think the night is over, you run into Dolly Parton:

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I may have lost all my money, but at least I got to see her big boobs in person. I asked if I could feel her up and she said yes! It was good for both of us.

Great trip except for when I did a major party foul and spilled my vodka lemonade all over the blackjack table. The pit bosses don’t like it when you do that. Especially when you soak all the cards and dealer’s chips and they have to wipe them off by hand. Then, as a joke, they call security on you just to see if you’ll crap your pants. I didn’t. I save that for the trails. They obviously don’t read this blog.

And, in case you die-hards are wondering if I ran in the horrid desert heat, why YES! Ken and I did the smart thing and slept in, then went out for a 5 mile run, hung-over at 8am when it was 95 degrees. Maybe this blog should be called Shut Up and Puke, at least on those days.

Don’t forget my CSN $100 giveaway!

38 comments:

  1. LOL....laughed through your entire post!

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  2. Those are osme big margs! Sounds like some awesome adventures so far... enjoy the rest of your trip, maybe with less pukiing and spilling!

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  3. When in Vegas, run like the locals, right?

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  4. Ahppy anniversary!! Crazy that you ran in the desert.

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  5. AWWW, happy anniversary! Thanks for snapping that pic of me! My a$$ looks so much better in those shorts than my mirror showed me! *Sigh* So much for what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. hahaha, JK, that's not me! Poor Dolly, I can't even tell anymore if that is an impersonator, but she is fab.

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  6. Ok so if that is the for real real Dolly, I am punching you in the baby maker cause that's how jealous I am! (Not really, but I'd think about it cause I LOVE her.)

    Happy anniversary. Glad you crazy kids had fun!

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  7. Sounds like a blast!! Happy Anniversary :)
    Is that really Dolly? I love her!

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  8. OMGosh.
    The best post ever.
    Maybe Peanut should live there?! ;)
    BTW I think the old man wishes he was the one BEHIND YOU!!

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  9. You kinda looked like you were about to ride the pony.

    Ok that butt photo is making me dry heave [sp].

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  10. Looks like a blast. I love Dolly and am green with envy that you got to meet her.

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  11. Sounds like another successful trip in Vegas!!!! Enjoy yourselves!!!

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  12. omg i need to go to vegas. like NOW haha. sounds like the greatest place to go ppl watching.

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  13. Happy Anniversary!

    I have those shorts. I wear them all the time these days. Too hot out there, & I like my ass cheeks to stay nice & cool.

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  14. You ran in Vegas desert heat!

    Happy Anniversary and I loved the hangover dudes.

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  15. God bless ya for running in Vegas hung over. just don't know if i could! bravo!

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  16. Awwwwwwwwwwwww. (That was for the booty shorts and not the anav)

    just kidding, it was for the anv.

    So awesome that you met dolly.

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  17. Running in the Vegas heat...and hung over?!? You're die-hard...or crazy...or both! Love this post -- too funny!

    Happy Anniversary!

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  18. People take liberties they would never take in their normal lives?
    Haven't you ever seen those People of Walmart photos going around the internet?

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  19. Ah yes, welcome to my hometown. To get the best views you really need to hang around about 7 am on a Sunday morning when all the partiers (sp) are stragling in. Good times.

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  20. SO, how many times a year do you go to Vegas?

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  21. I really wish I had thought of that Hangover guys idea. Actually, that sounds like an awesome Halloween idea. I'm doing it.

    Looks like a fun time!

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  22. That's not the greatest butt I have ever seen :)

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  23. Yeah! Thanks for getting the pics for us!

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  24. Oh my goodness...is that for real Dolly Parton?! I was in Vegas two weeks ago for a wedding and went running every day because everybody else was sleeping in and I was bored, but it was, truly, HOT! I killed my cell phone by putting it in my sports bra and getting it soaked with sweat.

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  25. best. trip. ever. and possible fodder for "people of wal-mart." Way to go.

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  26. GOOD LORD I LOVE ME SOME VEGAS.

    best people watching ever.

    Miz.

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  27. Nothing like a heat-induced run to sweat a little Vodka out of the system!

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  28. Dolly's even shorter than Dean Karnazes (about 5'1"), but the impersonators look more like her than she looks like herself now.

    I love the Hangover wannabes! Where'd the naked Asian guy go? The trunk of the car in the background?

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  29. Those shorts are TERRIFYING! Have you ever been to the California State Fair? That's a place you see a lot of those kind of sights too....scary stuff. Looks like you guys are having a great time!

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  30. Sounds and looks like you are having a great trip!

    It doesn't take Vegas to bring out the inappropriately dressed! Just go to a county fair. eeeeeeewwwwwwwww

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  31. ok so don't laugh, i never know when you are being serious or not, is that really dolly and did you really feel her boobs? Glad you guys had fun! happy anniversary! (guess i can comment on your blog today, weird)

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  32. Great pics :) :) Dolly's lookin' good too!

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  33. Sounds like an amazing trip! I love the pictures! Happy anniversary!

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  34. I'm so jealous that you got to feel Dolly up.

    Happy Belated Anniversary!

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  35. I love the Hangover guys. That's awesome. And we run in that heat all the time down here in Texas.

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