Britney Spears Should Give Me That Dress

I’m back from Vegas, and it did not disappoint. I have to say, I actually loved every stinking minute of it, even when I was losing at black jack or some hairy drunk person tried to pick me up at the pool. One thing I noticed on this trip, however, is how much has changed for me since I started visiting Sin City 10 years ago. In other words, these are things I notice about myself as I am getting old:

• I have much less no tolerance for drunk people
• I actually enjoy getting up at the ass crack of dawn to work out
• Not to be a snob, but I can’t stay at dumpy hotels anymore. I’d rather save my money for a whole year and stay at the Wynn than go to Vegas five times a year and stay at some dive on the Strip. It’s nice to not bring back any pet bedbugs, although I know you can also get them at nice hotels.

We got a great deal for this trip through Southwest Vacations. They Wynn is not cheap, especially on a weekend, but booking our flights and lodging together actually made it somewhat affordable. Also, when we got there we found out we had $100 free in food and drink credit.

I loved Southwest before this trip, but I love it even more now. The flight attendant did the funniest safety demonstration I have ever heard in my life. It was like a stand up comedy act, including telling us that we should “wear our seatbelts low and tight around our waists, like the captain wears his Speedo.”  Free bags and efficient, friendly service also make Southwest the way to go.

The Wynn does not usually disappoint, but when we got there they put us in a room that stunk like mildew. It was 11 pm and were weren’t really in the mood for the stank. They immediately booked us into another room on the 19th floor with a great view of the golf course, the pool, and the roof. I love a good roof view.

I am always the person who changes rooms. I usually have to do it at least once. High maintenance, I know. It took forever to make the room switch and we ended up laying around in the hallway for about an hour. I walked on my hands to pass the time. You think I’m kidding, but I’m not.

The thing that surprised me most on this trip was that Erika actually got up at 6:00 a.m. to work out with me.

No kidding – in years past she has slept until 10 or 11 a.m. everyday. She HATES morning. HATES getting up. She told me to wake her up to run, so I jumped on her and gave her my best Shut up and Run, You Pussy speech. It worked. Shaming is a wonderful thing.

We got to the fitness center, she looked at the treadmills and said, “What are those?” WTF? You can tell she’s kind of confused. I am proud of this girl. She is training for her first half marathon at the Denver Rock and Roll in September.

A lot of hotels in Vegas will now add on a mandatory “Resort Fee.” This covers access to the fitness center, WiFi and printing of your boarding passes. It’s $25/day. Kind of pricey, but if you use it, it’s worth it.

After our runs we would hit up the Café for some amazing pastries. My favorite was the almond croissant on the right with the powdered sugar (and for those of you who told me I was too skinny and needed to eat, ask Erika how much I eat in a given day, then shut up and mind your own business):

We spent all day and I mean ALL day at the pool. Like from 8 a.m. until 5:00 p.m. It’s a full time job that you aren’t paid for.

It was 108 degrees, so you either had to be in the pool or in the shade. We spent the majority of our time on the blackjack tables because they have some right by the pool. That night we hit up the Hardrock and I won a bunch of money (about $400). I fell in love with this dress Britney Spears wore in 2008. I tried to buy it with my winnings, but was shy $100,000.

We at some late night sushi at the famous Nobu. Not cheap, but outstanding.

I am always in a hurry, but Erika is a “stop and smell the tulips” girl and I love that about her.

By the time I got home yesterday I was delirious. For some reason my body doesn’t function well on 3 hours of sleep a night and a diet of second hand smoke and Absolut Citron. I needed a detox. I got it this morning when Ken made my ride up to Jamestown, which is 2,200 feet of climbing and an almost 40 mile round trip. Good thing vodka doesn’t smell coming out of your pores.

What’s your favorite airline to fly? I have always loved Frontier, but lately I don’t think their service or prices are as good.

Do you workout on vacation? Do you use the fitness center or run outside? I am an outside girl. It was so hot so we did one morning at the gym, then ran the Strip early one morning. The prostitutes cheered us on.

What’s the next trip you have planned? We are headed to Florida in a couple of weeks to see my in-laws, and are going to Universal Orlando. Anyone been there?

SUAR