Sunday, March 14, 2010

My New Party Hat

Running tip: If you're having trouble getting motivated to run, sign up for a race and tell everyone. You'll be much less likely to drop your training plan if you've spent the money and blabbed that you're doing it. Then, if you don't show up, you're poor and a loser.

I’ve got some random thoughts for today. I didn’t want to devote an entire post to any one of these things, so let’s just do some bulleting:

  • Before I get all serious, I'll tell you this: son Sam came home from baseball yesterday and promptly put his crotch cup on Lucky’s head. Poor dog. It does make a great party hat! I might wear it to my next social gathering. PTA here I come.


  • Running is such a mental game. If you go out to run 18 miles and you are committed to the distance, that’s what you will do. If you go out to run 9 miles the next week you feel like that is only as far as you can go. I think that’s why when people run a half marathon they will sometimes say after the fact: "I could not have gone another 13.1." The point is, it’s about what you set your mind to before you started running. You run differently and think differently for different distances. This is not rocket science and yes, I am stating the obvious, but I thought about this today on my run (here I am getting ready to go. Ignore the mess that is my house ->).

  • People who yell at their kids and treat them like shit in public are evil. We all scream at our kids at some point and have moments that wouldn't win us a parent of the year award. But, I’m talking about those parents who are constantly all over their children using a tone that shouldn’t even be used on a disobedient dog. “Put that down! Come over here! Shut your mouth!” Poor kids can’t catch a break. I was in Walgreen’s today and some mom with three little girls was doing this. She ended her tirade by commanding them to “Get in the damn car.” As far as I could tell, the kids were being kids. They weren’t poorly behaved. They were little and acting like little kids act. My thought on this is that if people treat their kids like this in public for all the world to see, my God, what are they doing to these kids in their privacy of their own home? Granted, I don’t know what kind of shit this woman has going on in her life, but it was obvious she was taking it out on those girls. In those moments of treating her kids with absolutely no respect, she is molding their little minds and souls, and not for the better. Made me sick.

  • Chelsea Handler is entertaining. Chelsea Handler is funny. Chelsea Handler is also kind of a drunkard and seems pretty angry. The show last night was a decent one if you like the "f" word and making fun of minorities. I loved her poop references and appreciated all of her references to masturbating on the playground when she was eight. But, truthfully, she seemed tired. Almost like she didn’t want to be there. She did not wear this last night ->, nor did she looked this good. She dropped about 39 f-bombs in one minute, including constantly asking, “Can I get a f*cking drink???” I will say, the guy who opened for her, Josh Wolfe was hilarious (go see him if he comes to your town):




  • I find it curious and fascinating that some of the most generous people are those that have the least to give. Take for example last night. Some dude who had driven down from Gillette, WY sat by me at the Chelsea Handler show. He was probably in his 20s and a little rough around the edges. I think he worked at a coal mine in WY. At one point he got up to get a drink (you had to walk out of the large theater to do this). He asked if we wanted anything (something most people wouldn’t bother do ask a stranger). I gave him $6.50 for a glass of wine (total freaking rip off). He was gone a LONG time because the drink lines were crazy. When he finally got back he had brought me two glasses of wine and a beer for Ken. Just because it took him so long. Later, he got up again for drinks. Didn’t ask if we wanted anything, but came back with another glass of wine for me and another beer for Ken. In total, he spent $26 on us – just because. I have sat beside hundreds of thousands of people in my life at shows, movies, on airplanes, etc. No one has shown this generosity, least of all some of those wealthy types with the sticks up their asses. I take that back. Last year in Vegas some dude kept giving me $100 chips at the blackjack table if I would stay and gamble with him, but he probably thought I was a prostitute. I actually won a lot of money and he wouldn’t take any of it.

  • This made me think a lot about the spirit of giving and generosity. We hold on so tight to what we have sometimes because we are afraid. Afraid there won’t be enough for us. What would happen if we were less fearful and more big hearted?

Woah – me getting all serious on you guys today. Well, life can’t be one big hilarious fart all the time.

How was your weekend and what did you notice?

Drinking: H2O

38 comments:

  1. You're so right about the mental games... if I set out for 5K, that is ALL I'm doing that day....

    WOW on the free drinks from the guy at the show. What a nice gesture of kindness.

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  2. YES, YES, and YES. Today was ten miles. Mile eight and nine sucked. Uphill (from St. Vrain rd up Airport/up 17th). Cold, wind blowing. My back was killin me and I was ready to puke. Then Garmin said those two miles were the fastest of the ten *smile*!

    I love unexpected acts of kindness. The world would be a better place with guys like that.

    I know someone that consistanty drops f-bombs and basically berates her elementary school aged kids in public. And she wonders why they are in the principals office at least once a week.

    Great rant today, Beth!

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  3. Today is my (we'll just leave the number out!) birthday and my hubby and son took me out for ice cream. While enjoying my 1100 calorie banana split I noticed an old (not old to me anymore!) couple sitting/eating together. He was hooked up to an oxygen tank and she was wheelchair bound. He fed her a bite, then himself, then her again and so on. They were just so damn cute it made me smile. All warm and fuzzy after that. Love shines through a wheelchair and all that oxygen tubing just like they were newlyweds!
    I like the thinking for the running-makes total sense. I totally said that same comment after my 1/2; "no way I could do that twice for a full marathon"......of course I never thought I'd be doing anything that I do now!

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  4. wow great bullet points. i love/hate how mental running is. sometimes i love that i can push my body to a higher level just because i can mentally push more. but i hate that even if my body can do a run or something but if my mind isn't in it then it's over before it began.

    and wow that generosity is so rare. but youre right, it's always those who have nothing who are the most generous

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  5. Yes, you are so right about the mentalness of the distance you set out to run. Very true!

    You are also so right about generosity. I used to work in a coffee shop and got tips all of the time from the guys in coveralls that pulled up in old pick ups, but never from the guys in suits that pulled up in luxury cars.

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  6. gosh I have lots of thoughts here.. I was just thinking about the distance thing the other day. I realized if I don't select a goal before heading out, I'll quite earlier than I'd like.

    the kids thing is so weird, I hate listening to people talk that way...I think they either don't parent at home at all or are beyond nasty

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  7. You are so right about the people who are actually charitable. I know that my fiancee and I don't have much, but we try to share what we have because we know others have even less than we do. If only people with more money had the same attitude...the world would be so much better a place!

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  8. I struggle withthe mental part of a race every race day. I know I have prepared enough and can do the distance and have a good plan, but there is always that little bit of doubt that creeps in and screws me all up. SOmetimes I think i train better than I race, and I just vented about it on my blog! It was nice to read your poast about the same things! Thanks

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  9. 1. Lucky looks so jaunty in that cup!

    2. Yes totally mental. Maybe not the pace, but definitely the mileage.

    3. Mean parents suck. Although I confess I snarled at Thing 2 in Whole Foods today...inaudibly though.

    4. Is CH the one with that talk show?

    5. The cheapness/generosity factor was very apparent at our wedding.

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  10. I'd like to say that the crotsh cup would make an awesome fascinator if you just added some feathers and a few sequins. Not sure how Sam would feel about wearing it to baseball though.

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  11. The mental thing with running is so true - no matter what distance I am running, I feel like I can't go any further once I get about a mile from the finish.

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  12. Why can't it all just be farts? Life would be so easy. Smelly, but easy.

    So here's what's on my mind. I'm curious how it works for you people (yes, you're getting generically grouped here) that have a ton of random photos of yourselves in your blogs. Do you just have cameras following you around all day like a reality tv show? Or do have to be all "hey, honey, take a picture of me walking down the hall". Inquiring minds want to know.

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  13. I couldn't agree with you more about the running stuff! I was just telling my best friend that if I hadn't told people I was running a marathon I don't think I would follow through with it...but now I feel like I have to do it.

    So mental...running! I had 14 miles to do last week and they were tough so I figured my 10 miles this week would be easy...WRONG! Crazy how mental it is. I always decided the distance I am going before I go out or it won't work. Setting you mind to distance and then going on auto pilot for those long runs.

    Thanks for the great post. Couldn't agree more with what you said about running!

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  14. You hit the jackpot on the mental thing.
    And I don't like screaming meanie parents either. I think sometimes when parents do that all the time, the kids will no longer take them seriously and will misbehave all the time.

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  15. I loves me some F bombs as much as the next guy - but honestly I think that people are a LOT funnier if they don't use them. Now, if they are hot and they come out on stage wearing nothing but an applause sign.....

    So awesome about the guy w/ the drinks. Simply awesome.

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  16. I love "the mess that is [your] house"! Makes me feel at home. ;)

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  17. my weekend was great!! Even though I missed my race, I did not miss out on a great family vacation with my sweet girls and handsome husband...we made the best of hurricane conditions and enjoyed every minute of it!

    I too cannot stand when I see people treating kids like dogs, I know what it is like to have your hands full and be frustrated, but when I feel that way about my kids, I only begin to imagine what they feel about me and cannot express it too me....people are evil, raising kids starts with raising parents!

    Have a great week!

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  18. I couldnt agree more on running being a mental game. It totally is and sometimes your mind can get the best of you!

    I get so seriously annoyed and pissed off when people scream and yell at their kids in public. First of all i must share that i dont have a kid, so i cant be quick to judge. However, I have been a kid before *duh* and have been obnixous... and i have been around kids i want to scream loudly at but sometimes you just have to laugh. Life is too short to be mad at something you wont remember in 2 hours. Catch my drift?

    I love that your kid put his ball cup on your dogs head. thats epic.

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  19. that hat is too funny!! and yeah i totally agree with the mental part of running..sometimes that is the hardest!

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  20. Being ready to run is a mental and physical battle. You do need to be ready for both.
    I've been training for a 30K in 2 weeks but life got in the way - again. Depending on the next three days, I'm thinking of running only 25K of the course, which I will be mentally and physically ready for. The last 5K has me really nervous and I don't want to face that going in.

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  21. I've been wondering recently as I read your posts ... do you have paparazzi that live at your house and follow you around taking all the pics we see??

    Paul :-)

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  22. Word. To everything in this post. Seriously.

    I ran a 14 miler this weekend. The middle miles were a bit rough but nothing like my 12 miler last weekend. It really is all about mindset.

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  23. How much did that make your night? Don't you just love people sometimes? That just warmed my heart.

    Sorry to hear that about Chelsea. I hate that. If she doesn't want to do the show, she shouldn't. Glad the opener was good. When I saw her, the opener (a woman) was HORRIBLE. Just painful to watch.

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  24. Well, one caveat about the mental thing. I was TOTALLY mentally ready to run 100 miles and then broke my hand in a fall, stepped in a hornet's nest, got disoriented... but, yeah, you have to have the mental part down, too.

    Time for you step up from Chelsea to Sarah Silverman and then to Amy Sidaris - the filthy drunk Jewish princess pantheon awaits!

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  25. SUCH a freaking great post for today! ONE: you are SO right about distance running. I mean I thought it would be relatively impossible to run over five miles once, and here I am already up to twelve. It's like you put your mind on the distance and you're all good. I mean why WOULDN'T you go that far? You already set your mind to it! While I'm still unsure about marathon length because of my knee issues, a part of me secretly hopes I can do it one day.
    TWO: I want to print out your last couple paragraphs and tape them to my eyeballs...talk about inspiration. We need more guys like that out there.

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  26. What I'm observing is that it's snowing. Again. And I'm extremely tired of this weather!!!!! And I'm going out of town this weekend to the South, and it's suppose to be really COLD down there, too. Is it me? If it's a balmy 80 here while I am gone, then it IS me and I apologize! Love your post as always, Beth :). Have a great week!!

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  27. The mental part is so big, I agree. If I force myself to get dressed, then I HAVE to go. If for no other reason than my clothes generally stink, and I can't stand myself.

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  28. I couldn't agree more - running sometimes is more mental than physical - crazy!
    Too bad about Chelsea, she is coming to the Bay Area and everyone is all crazy excited, glad I didn't spend $$ on it. And you are SO right about the lady screaming at her kids - I get all worried and have said stuff in the past.
    Have a great week!

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  29. I'm sorry that the show wasn't what you expected. I knew she was a loud mouth, but I had no idea that she was an angry biatch.

    I'm going to start telling myself that I am running 20 miles every training run, then if I only have to go to 14...BONUS! JK, your words are so true girl.

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  30. My friend who is training for a marathon (though hasn't yet signed up for one, issue #1) was talking this weekend about how unmotivated she was after the 18-miler. She said she had hit a wall and was feeling tired and achy. All I could think was, "Do you think I am jumping up and down with excitement, ailment free, when I do my 20-mile training runs?" Yes, this is all part of the mental game. I told her that running a marathon is far more mental than physical. Being tired, achy and unmotivated is what it's all about.

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  31. Staying focused and pressing through are all you can hope to do sometimes. You press through the 'I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than do this' feeling and it's OH SO SWEET. I spent my weekend analyzing the near panic attack I had during Bikram and then again during a run. (I know it's not my turn during circle time....)but I came to what I come to during long runs and feel like I can't do it any more. One more breath - there is plenty of air, one more step - I have plenty of strength. It is in the expending of energy, generosity, love, air, money, time that we receive.

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  32. I find it so interesting when you say that you can run whatever distance you put your mind too. That is a powerful thing to think about.

    And whenever I see someone taking their anger out on their children in public I cringe. Your right, maybe her life is the shits, but you know what? It isn't the children's fault.

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  33. I find that the fbomb is usually dropped most by those that do not have good lines to begin with...just sayin'.

    Yeah, why can't I seem to run another mile once I have reached the amount I had in my mind? That sucks!

    There have been times when I was just having a bad day and then felt terrible for scolding my son afterwards. I am glad he is forgiving.

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  34. Hello - Need a little help with my Boston bib number. Wanted to see if you can share your knowledge about the number 19226 :)

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  35. I have also noticed the same obvious thing about doing what you set your mind on...not just in running, but in life. You will get out of life about what you expect to--I always say to expect well! That also ties to your last bullet about giving--nothing feels better than giving, just because. There is not a finite supply of material goods or money (heck the Fed will just print more anyway!) so why not give generously and often?!

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