Ultimate Stocking Stuffer Giveaway

I’m glad I’m not the only one who fell out of a car when I was little. Yet, clearly I am the only one who hit my head hard enough to make me want to grow up to be a blogger who writes about crapping in bushes and trees while running.

I will say, the comment that made me laugh out loud was this one from Julie:

“One of my favorite childhood memories is being about 5 years old, topless, in a convertible, on a road trip with NO seatbelts and doing the honk motion at every truck on the road. Good times.”

Best visual ever.

The Giveaway

I’m naughty. But, I’m nice too.

Outside PR, on behalf of their GU, Road ID and Ryder’s Eyewear clients, has generously offered up an Ultimate Stocking Stuffer Giveaway right in time for the holidays.

Are you ready? The winner will get all of the following:

• Vanilla Gingerbread, Mint and *your favorite flavor/product* from GU ($24.00 value)

• Road ID socks ($7.99 value), Road ID hat ($9.99 value), & Road ID gift card

• Ryders VTX sunglasses for racing, working out, and the like ($59.99 value) :

Ryder’s Grindhouse or Shreddie sunglasses ($39.99 value)  for naughty relaxing while eggnoging

That’s a lot of stuff. I personally like the sound of the Grindhouse. It just has that dirty ring to it.

Want the loot? Here’s how to enter (comment for each):

1. Follow my blog and let me know or if you already follow tell me + 1 entry
2. Write about this giveaway on your forehead, blog, Facebook, Twitter, etc. + 1 entry
3. Sign up for the GU blog RSS feed +1 entry
4. Submit a photo of yourself doing whatever sport you love at the Ryders "Ride for Real" photo gallery +2 entry (please leave two comments)
5. Enter the Road ID Holiday Giveaway (extra entries granted for every $5 donated) + 1 entry (5 extra entries per $5 donated. Leave that number of comments)

That’s up to 6+ entries! So, get busy. This giveaway will end on 12/14.

Good luck,

SUAR

The fine print:

• Per FTC guidelines: Outside PR (by means of their clients: GU, Road ID and Ryders Eyewear) provided the giveaway items.
• Contest  open to both US and Canadian residents!
• The winner will be chosen at random by Random.org. Check back December 14 to see if you won!

Insane Contest and Giveaway

Running tip: If you have always wanted to run naked, but didn’t know how to go about doing it without being arrested, check out the Naked Pumpkin Run website. Good old fashioned fun!

I’ve got something brewing. I’ve had it brewing for a couple of weeks now. And, I’m going to let it out.

Those who know me and know this blog are likely worried I’m about to have a colon blow. But, alas, it is nothing like that. Not even close. This is something you will like, something that won’t revolt you and doesn’t smell. I might go so far as to say this is something you will love. And, if this wasn’t my blog, I would be all over becoming a part of this thing.

You are not going to believe this giveaway/contest. There are two parts, so listen up. Or, if you don’t read my blog out loud, then read up:

Outside PR, a company that represents such faves as Ryder’s Eyewear, GoLite, Road I.D., Sugoi and GU, helped score the amazing products for this contest/giveaway. Devon of Outside PR (who is a she, not a he) did this up right. Thanks Devon and thanks to GoLite and Ryders!

Here we go.

For the giveaway, there will be two winners, a female and a male. Here are your prizes:

For the female winner:

GoLite Cottonwood Run Tank $50

GoLite Tilly Jane Run Skirt $60

Ryders Drill Sunglasses: $39.99

For the male winner:

GoLite Wildwood Shirt $45

GoLite Mesa Short $40

Ryders Eyewear Drill Sunglasses $39.99

Combined, this is $275 worth of stuff from GoLite and Ryders Eyewear! Nothing to sneeze at.

To enter:

There are several ways to enter to win, each that will give you points:

1. Submit a picture of yourself to brisdon@comcast.net in your most ridiculous and idiotic running gear. Don’t be shy. Showing skin, fat, wedgies, camel toes, etc is fine if it’s not too profane. Let me see your style! Go for shock value! Show me why you need some new clothes!: +5 entries (I will enter your entries manually in the comments to be sure you get your credit).
2. Leave a comment as to why you want to win the gear: +1 entry
3. Become a follower of this blog and leave a comment telling me so: +1 entry
4. Link back to this giveaway from your blog and leave comment telling me so: +1 entry
5. Become a FB Fan or follower on Twitter of Ryders Eyewear and leave comment telling me so +1 entry
6. Become a FB Fan or follower on Twitter of GoLite and leave comment telling me so +1 entry

Note: You do not have to submit a picture to enter the giveaway. Just do one of the above for an entry (or entries).

Please leave a comment for each of the above so you get your correct number of entries!

One female and one male winner will be selected randomly on April 12th.

Photo entries from the top contenders (at my discretion) for both male and females will be published on my blog on April 13th. Readers can then vote on these photos. On April 19th, the female and male winners with the most votes will each win:

GoLite: Rush Pack $70

So, get busy. Find the grossest/ugliest/outdated/worst running gear. Undress yourself. Observe yourself in the mirror for a moment like you usually do when you’re naked. Put on your grossest/ugliest/outdated/worst running gear. Set the self timer, or find someone who won’t make fun of you to take your picture. Email it to me at brisdon@comcast.net. Sit back and wait for your victory!

As an example, here’s me in some a stupid ass running get-up. I know you can do better than this:

In small writing:

• Enter now through Monday, April 12, at noon (Mountain time).
• Only residents of the US and Canada, please
• Winners of the random drawing to be announced Tuesday, April 13.
• You guys will vote on the top photo entries from Tuesday, April 13 to Sunday April 18.
• Winners of the photo contest to be announced Monday, April 19.
• All of this cool stuff for the giveaway was provided by Outside PR from GoLite and Ryder’s Eyewear. I didn’t pay for any of it.

Good luck!

Drinking: H2O

Free Ball

Running tip: Avoid carrying loose change. It will annoy those running with you.

Well, shit. I just cannot pull one over on you guys. I apparently had two faux pas (pauses?) in my last post.

First of all, I told you about Devon from Outside PR who so graciously sent me the Ryders Eyewear to review. I eloquently described Devon as being a cute guy, but this was just in my imagination. Imagine my surprise when Devon emailed me to let me know she was a she. Vagina and all. Well, she didn’t say that, but I did. Sorry, Devon. Those names that could go either way really mess me up (Pat, Morgan, Drew, Yanni). I never should have assumed. Ass out of U and Me. Right?

Secondly, Paul from PB Down Under was kind enough to leave me this comment on my last post when I spoke of "wetting whetting your pallet":

What a giggle you have given me when you say something like "wet your pallet." ROTFL :-) Maybe you think we are all truckers and have piles of these things (pallets) lying around?? Methinks your fingers meant to type "palate!" Blame it on the finger with the cut who was probably just trying to get you back for attempting to chop her off!

Well, Paul, let me tell you something. I actually was talking about a trucker’s pallet. How did you know? I was hoping that we could all take a moment to rinse off and hose down those pallets we have laying around. Did you think I meant “palate?” (The roof of the mouth in vertebrates having a complete or partial separation of the oral and nasal cavities). As in a cleft palate? Oh no, my friend.

And if you believe that then you’ll believe I meant to say "Chopin was a concert penis" not a "concert pianist."

Seriously, though, thanks for the comment. You guys always make me laugh. I read each and everyone one of them.

Despite all of my shortcomings (and there are too many of them to ever confine to this blog), someone out there loved me yesterday.

Let me set the stage for you. I had just finished an 8.5 mile run, rinsed off, and decided to hit the Starbuck’s drive-thru before running a few mom-errands. I was not wearing mom jeans or listening to mom music (Kenny Rogers, Billy Joel) when I did this. The line at the drive thru was long, but I was in no hurry. I passed the time listening to Dr. Laura berate someone for the 201st time about the fact that they lived with their boyfriend (I think “whore” was the word she used). I finally ordered my grande mild coffee with extra cream (right to my colon), and inched my way to the pay window. I had my $2 out and ready to go. Rolling my window down as I approached the cashier I heard her say, “You’re all taken care of. The car in front of you paid for your drink.” Damn, I love this pay it forward stuff. And, damn, if I would have known I would have gotten a triple venti extra large mocha with gold shavings.

Seriously, thanks to that anonymous soul. I tried to chase him/her down flailing my money at their car so I wouldn’t feel so indebted to the universe, but he/she had disappeared into the mess of side streets and box stores.

This has been happening to me all over the place. First the guy at the Chelsea Handler show buying me drinks. Then my massage therapist gave me a free massage the other day because I lended an ear to listen to some of her personal problems. Now, the free coffee. What is this world coming to? Who do these generous people think they are? And, who of you, and I mean who of you is going to pay my mortgage this month?

Wish me luck on my 20 miler this weekend. I had it all mapped out on back dirt roads until we got major snow today. Now what’s a girl to do? Will she ice bath or won't she ice bath? Will she wear any clothes this time, or will she free ball? (What is the female equivalent of "free ball" anyway? Loose lip? Feel free to comment about that one).

Misszippy is doing a great giveaway on her blog for the new book Run Like a Mother that comes out 3/23. Also on her blog is an interview with the author.

Drinking: H20

Review: Ryders Sunglasses

Running tip: Buy running clothes you like. This may sound obvious, but you're probably more likely to be motivated to run if you have something to put on that you feel good in. If this is a sparkly bright red thong, so be it. Your neighbors will love you for it.


A few weeks ago, this seemingly cute and very smart guy, Devon, contacted me from Outside PR wanting to know if I could review a couple of running products. I know he is smart because he used big words I didn't understand in the email. I know he is cute because he was witty and works for a cool company. Those people are always cute.

I hate getting stuff for free, especially running goods, but I said “yes” anyway. Outside PR is an agency that represents such favorite products as Road I.D., Sugoi, GU, Go-lite and Ryder’s Eyewear.

By the way, I’m kidding. Like any breathing human, I love free stuff. I will review a business card, a Frisbee or a plastic cup with your university logo on it if you send it to me. You can only imagine the goody bag I bring home from a marathon expo.

Last week I got these Ryder’s sunglasses* in the mail:




Yes, that's a cut on my finger. Wanna see it up close? Wanna see what a sucky camera I have? That could just be a smile I made with a red Sharpie, but it really is a wound from a knife. Cutting apples can be very dangerous.


Fortunately, because I am in the last two months of marathon training and I am running so much I almost despise it (oh, stop your gasping, you feel that way sometimes too), I had ample opportunity this week to give these shades a whirl. Also, fortunately, the sun had finally returned from its long hiatus to Tahiti or Hawaii or wherever the sun hangs out when it’s not around here (okay, calm down, I know the sun is just behind clouds or going down on Elton John – “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down On Me…” which could very easily be “Don’t Let Your Son Go Down on Me”, but that’s another post).

Previously, I was sporting the Wal-Mart special aerodynamic glasses (I think Kara Goucher wears these too), and it was tough to think of parting with them, especially since they cost $4.99. Devon gave me some options to pick from on the Ryder website from the Adrenaline collection. It is not an easy thing to pick sunglasses without trying them on. That means you can’t look at yourself in the mirror and make faces and pull your hair back and in front of your face and pretend you are running by jogging in place. Or maybe I just do that.

In any case, I chose the Sprint model in black with a grey lens. I chose them because they will make me look hardcore and will make me a better runner. In reality, I thought they were a good looking pair of glasses, with that athletic vibe. I also liked the option for the grey lens as that’s my color of choice in sunglass lenses. I prefer to see the world in hues of grey because it is uplifting. Here’s the actual description on these glasses:

FRAME: MATTE BLACK, DURAFLEX
LENS: GREY, VENTED, POLYCARBONATE, 100% UV PROTECTION
TINT: 15% VLT
FIT: MEDIUM
FEATURES: ADJUSTABLE ANTI-SLIP NOSE PADS, ANTI-SLIP TEMPLE TIPS
PRICE: $39.99

The lenses are shatterproof, scratch resistant and provide 100% UV protection. All glasses have anti slip and adjustable nose pads. The temple tips are also anti slip.

After a couple of runs in these glasses, I found I really liked them (and not just because they were free). I liked them because I did not notice them. To me, not noticing things on my body while running is a good thing. I hate having to mess with anything during my runs, especially if it’s because it’s uncomfortable, annoying, or not performing its function properly.

Essentially, the glasses did their job: stayed in place, provided protection from the bright Colorado sun, and were lightweight enough that I didn’t feel them on my face. They reduced the glare, but were not so dark that they distorted colors or kept me from knowing when the light was green at the crosswalk (this is important if you want to live during your run). The price isn't bad either ($39.99 or free if you're me).

Next up in a future post will be my review on the Race + Recovery Compression Tights from Sugoi. To wet your pallet, expect to see me in the tightest tights you’ve ever seen. As in, I could put on high heels, get a perm and be slutty Sandy at the end at the end of the movie, Grease (if only I could sing, was gorgeous, smoked and came from down unda').

Drinking: H20

*Outside PR sent me the product for free to review on my blog (courtesy of Ryders Eyewear). I did not pay for the item or exchange any favors for it.