Friday, September 14, 2012

Piss Hill

I like a good challenge, but I am also a wimp. I don’t like to feel pain, be tired or think I am on the verge of throwing up. I think that’s why I didn’t sign up for this race earlier. And, it’s tomorrow morning.

 

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Yeah, that’s a hill or two. Too bad I won’t have time to stop and piss on Piss Hill. And, too bad there is not a Fart Hill.

I know this is only 4.5 miles. I should be shot for being a pussy. But, I also know it will be an uncomfortable 4.5 miles full of beauty and cussing. The thing is, I have no qualms about the climbing or going the distance. It’s just that I put all of this pressure on myself to push, push, push.

Ken signed up a couple of weeks ago and I was on the fence. My knee's been hurting, blah, blah, blah. I love trail running, but not sure I like trail sprinting. It’s the same reason I don’t like 5Ks that much. They hurt me. Weird that in some respects a half marathon feels more manageable to me than a 5K.  But, I am going to do the race because it’s cheap, in a gorgeous setting and there are pancakes at the end.

But, between you and me, why I really signed up was this quote I read earlier this week:

“The point is not to be afraid of doing what is hard. Embrace what does not come naturally. Only in this way will you stop limiting yourself and allow for the deepest part of you to express yourself in ways you might not have imagined yet.” (Swami Chetanananda)

This got me thinking about all areas of my life and how I want to shy away from things that I think I won’t be successful at. Let’s face it – it’s much, much easier to quit (or not start) something that is challenging for you than to risk not being good at it, not finishing it or failing in some way.

Yet, when you quit, you take absolutely no risk. You can safely return to your little world where all is familiar and comfy. But, when you quit (or worse yet don’t even try) you are missing the entire point of living. Living is about making yourself so uncomfortable that you come out the other side exhilarated.

So, I’ll let you know how exhilarated I am tomorrow.

Ever had a DNS or DNF in life that you’ve regretted? I’ve had several jobs that I think I gave up on too early. If they didn’t meet my expectations immediately, I bailed. I’m learning that good things do not happen overnight. They need to be worked for and patience is required.

SUAR

27 comments:

  1. This is so on point for me! I do not like being uncomfortable. Love your statement about living...being uncomfortable...exhilarating. So true! Have fun tomorrow :-)

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  2. Good luck tomorrow out there Beth! You're going to rock this thing! (I say we rename it Fart Hill---so let her rip!)

    Sarah
    www.thinfluenced.com

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  3. Ohhh perfectionism, I actually wrote a post about some of my struggles that very problem a few weeks ago.

    It sounds like such a good productive word doesn't it? In reality it's so limiting.

    http://joggingjawa.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-paralysis-of-perfectionism.html

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  4. Hiker Me looks at that map and gets all giddy with excitement. I once did a hike (we called it "Elevation Gain Bang") that was 15 miles long with 11,000 +/- feet in elevation change. LOVED IT.

    Runner Me looks at that map and wants to vomit.

    But you have fun! :)

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  5. That is a lot of up and down over a short period of time, but you are a studette which makes this = PIECE OF CAKE! You've got this!

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  6. I have come to the realization after taking space up on this planet for 52 years that nothing good is ever easy. To walk the right path is never easy. Maybe nothing is easy. Everything I have achieved in life to get to whom I am was nothing but hard work. I am not fast, I am not smart, I am not good looking but I can work hard and value the hard work ethic.

    With that said, I am also very confused about why people are so competitive with running. We have people in our run club that just make running miserable because you have to PR every time. I don’t get it. I’m not running to cure cancer, it’s never going to pay me a cent. I run just to run. If I come is last and not injured I’m good with that verse PR’ing and having a injury. Enjoy the journey kind of thing. Run for Fun!

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    1. Who is this Anonymous GENIOUS?!?!?!?
      I love this guy (or girl) and I don't care who knows it!

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    2. For me, part of the fun is being competitive with myself, so it is a constant push and pull. I don't have to PR everytime (nor could I), but I like having goals for myself out there. I am always trying to find the balance.

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    3. Thank you for your post, Anonymous. I am getting over an injury and was told by my PT that I can run my first half marathon, but not at the pace I originally planned. Thus, I have to either defer or swallow my pride and jog/walk it just to finish it. Being told to just run it for fun is exactly what I need to hear right now. Then I can delete my excel spreadsheet with a list of every female in my age group from last year and their finishing times, and quit trying to compete with it all. :)

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  7. I think you're going to love it! I am jealous. :^)

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  8. I struggle with that a lot. Not quitting or never starting necessarily, but starting and not giving my best, so I'll have an excuse as to why I didn't PR. "Well, I didn't PR... But I didn't really try. It was too hot or too cold or too hilly or too rainy or the aids stations didn't have teh Gator Ade I like or whatevs".
    This is a GIANT waste of time and effort and more of a let down than if I had actually tried.

    "It's not failure but low aim is crime." ~ Lowell

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  9. I think building tolerance to suffering is the biggest and hardest thing to achieve during training, because we all naturally want to feel good and do well. At a trail race last week, I actually checked in with myself and realized that while I was panting and cursing and wanting to quit, I had definitely suffered MUCH worse in other races and finished those. So, drawing on that, I pushed forward and kept going. I thought that for sure my bad attitude had cost me an age group award... turned out that I got 1st place! It was a good lesson.

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  10. Well those downhills look really fun!
    For the uphills, I'd try and dream of the pancakes at the end - you'll deserve them for sure! Good luck and have fun!

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  11. Wow timing, I'm in the process of watching this and it is topical to your post and amazing

    http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame.html

    "Shame plays two big tapes.. 'never good enough, and if you can talk it out of that one 'who do you think you are'".

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  12. I was so terrified of a DNF for my first full marathon. But I will NEVER forget that totally overcoming feeling of accomplishment as I crossed the finish line! It may have been 4 minutes over my goal time, but 3 months later I'm finally ok with that. I feel so much stronger knowing I did it. I won't do another full until my kids are older or I don't work full time plus. But my next goal is a new PR for a half marathon. I will never place in a race, but I love constantly improving myself.

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  13. Whoa those are some serious hills. But the pancakes at the end will be so worth it. That alone is incentive for me to sign up for a race.
    Yeah, it's going to hurt. Hills are speed work in disguise remember? You aren't a pussy, if you were you wouldn't have signed up in the first place. I think you're going to have a blast.

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  14. Thanks for this reminder today. I needed this.

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  15. Well said!!! Had to share on my FB wall. Thx!

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  16. That race looks so easy. SIKE! Or syke. Or psych. Whichever word meant, "I'm totally lying just because I'm cool!" in the '80s.

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    1. Too funny! For the next generation it was "-NOT!" I wonder what the current "I'm totally lying just because I'm cool!" phrase is??

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  17. Beth I am counting on you since I am living vicariously thru all my runner friends And family right now. I am working thru a nasty hamstring strain that halted all exercise except stretches and now.....5 min eliptical. I was up to 6 miles and 60 min on eliptical, etc. Training for WDW 10 miler on Sept 28. But it was not meant to be this time. I twisted my ankle on a trail run. Had bronchitis for 2 weeks and a tear in my retina - oh and then this fffff hamstring issue. Sooooo, you see you must run and report all the joy and hardache. You are one of the things that keep me sane right now!

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  18. Have fun!

    'Uncomfortable' is another one of my middle names :)

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  19. goog luck out there!! yea, it's funny how we push ourselves in running but there is always that undercurrent of dread or at least 'oh gosh, here we go' feeling because we know it hurts like hell. but then it's totally worth it once it's over and done. we're all a little sickly addicted to torturing ourselves!

    but yea, the temptation to quit anything is usually there, i've bailed on past projects or jobs when it got to the point of i didn't want to work for it...i think the diff. is we have to decide wat is worth putting ourselves out there for. i think piss hill is def worth it. ;)

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  20. My daughters headed out for a 12 mile run this morning with 50 degree temperatures for the first time this fall. I admit. I'm jealous.. broken ankle 4 weeks ago has me heading to the pool to join the pussy posse.. Beth I think your run looks like a hell of a lot of fun! Enjoy the journey... and the pancakes!

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  21. hee...hee...looks like a typical Breck or Vail trail race. The 5k in Vail tomorrow has 950 elevation gain - the 10k has 1810ft elevation gain. Those crazy trail runners...Sombrero Trail run looks like fun - hope you had a good race!

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