Warning: Drama unfolding
We have been separated for about two weeks, running and me. I ache for it everyday. I see it all around me, yet it can’t be a part of me. Not now. I miss its comforting pace while taking me down a tree-lined road on a long run. I yearn for its drill sergeant voice that orders me to do one more Yasso even though I might throw up or crap my pants. I crave the words of wisdom and inspiration that light up my brain when we spend the morning on a trail by a lake looking at the mountains. I miss sharing the frosty winter mornings together when all is calm and barely light.
I know there are other friends like biking and swimming and yoga. They are good support systems too. They want me to be strong, yet they accept that I only spend time with them so I can go back to my first love - running.
You are right. It is not the end of the world to not be able to run. There are worse things. Much worse things. Children get hurt. Parents pass away. Cancer happens. The list goes on.
The thing about running, though, is it lessens the blow of all the really bad stuff. It accentuates the good. It takes a mundane day and gives it purpose and insight. It provides a means of coping with the ups and downs of life. It is constant. It is always there. Well, almost always.
I know it will be back. We still have a lot to do together.
Upon its return we will be tentative and careful with one another. Eventually, we will test our relationship as we start training. We might have some ups and downs as we try to figure out how to be together in a new and healthy way that does not involve someone getting hurt. I will set boundaries and that will be painful at times. Most likely we will need to take things slow and understand when to back off.
At the end of the day running has not let me down. It has given me the gift of OMFOTG (One More F*cking Opportunity To Grow). And grow I will.
But, for now my new friend is crutch. He sucks the big one (and makes me look like an old, tired hag).
Trying to be patient,