The Candy Drawer

If you missed my good news, click HERE.

If you missed my crude video, click HERE.

There may be something wrong with me, but every time I watch the video I laugh out loud at the fart sound (:56 into the video if you must know). Is this normal? I even still laugh out loud at my own fart sounds when I make them. Or, anyone else’s. It is even funnier if I don’t know them personally.

Say, for example, you are in the grocery store. The guy beside you is perusing the spaghetti sauces. He makes a snap decision to go with the Ragu, which is on the top shelf. He leans forward, reaches up, and WHAM, an unsuspecting fart escapes. This kind of an episode would make my day, my week. God help me if my kids were along. We would re-enact that episode for hours. “And then he leaned up and pftttttfpffft (insert fart sound)!!”

Moving on. Today I’d like to talk about a nasty subject. Believe it or not, it has nothing to do with bodily functions.

I’d like to talk HABITS. The word “habit” doesn’t always conjure up positive actions like, “I am in the habit of eating four servings of vegetables a day.” No, the word habit has kind of a negative connotation. As in, “I have this annoying habit of chewing on my hair.” Or, “I have a Coors Light habit I just can’t kick!”

Don’t be fooled. Habits and addictions are not that  far apart. Both are dependencies, yet they are on opposite ends of the spectrum. A habit seems benign, manageable. But, over time, it can take on a life of its own and become extremely difficult to break (addiction).

“The habit or an addiction is a human trait that is difficult to break, it is something that you are used to doing, something that satisfies a part of you, that you have developed because at the time you gained benefit from it, but over time the benefit may have been lost but the trait continues.” {source}

Yes, it is so true. We develop habits because they benefit us in some way. Chew your nails? You might be nervous or hungry. Sleeping with makeup on?  You’re tired to bother at night. Crunching ice? Just plain satisfying. Sleeping around? Just plain satisfying.

What I find fascinating, is that when one habit is stopped, it is replaced by another. Think of the quintessential A.A. meeting. No alcohol or drugs, but cigarettes and coffee out the ass.

In an effort to cut down on drinking wine during the week, I have discovered, to my horror, that my nightstand drawer looks like this:

Yes, I have replaced wine with candy. Don’t ask why I have a stuffed dog in there. The ibuprofen is self explanatory. That much candy or wine is going to give you a headache.

Having a glass of wine at night has become a habit to relieve stress. I’ve decided I don’t need to be drinking during the week. Changing this habit will cut down on costs, make me sleep better and make my weekend glass or two of wine that much more satisfying. That’s what I tell myself.

This replacement technique is actually suggested by therapists. Usually the goal is to substitute a behavior that is better than the one you had before. Like instead of yelling at the kids to relieve tension, you go for a run or flip off a stranger while driving. Is candy better than wine? Jury’s out on that one.

Other remedies for breaking “bad'” habits:

Beat Yourself Up – “You stupid girl! How can you keep doing this? You’ll never change!” Just kidding. Don’t do that.

Investigate - Figure out what benefit you get from the habit, just so you know why you do it. This may or may not help or make you feel better.

Give it Time– It takes at least 21 days to break a habit or to develop a new one. 21 freaking days. That’s a long time to not do something you really like to do.

Write it Down – Don’t leave commitments in your brain. Write them on paper. This does two things. First, it creates clarity by defining in specific terms what your change means. Second, it keeps you committed since it is easy to dismiss a thought, but harder to dismiss a promise printed in front of you. Unless you set fire to the paper or use it as TP, then it’s pretty easy to dismiss.

Tell–  Make a public commitment to everyone you know that you’re going to stick with it. Offer yourself a reward if you make it a month. Anything to give yourself that extra push. That way people can ridicule you if you don’t succeed. Hell, you can ridicule yourself.

Keep it Simple – Your change should involve one or two rules, not a dozen. Exercising once per day for at least thirty minutes is easier to follow than exercising Monday, every other Wednesday, Tuesdays when it’s snowing, alternating mountain biking with hot yoga then adding in swimming some laps but only if you can’t run in the deep end because the pussy posse is there. Simple rules create habits, complex rules create headaches.

What’s your nasty habit? Is it staying or going? How will you stop?

Heading for the nightstand drawer,

SUAR

PS: Tomorrow I can run for eight minutes! Injury be damned!!