I’m going to make this a sprint race report because this was a sprint triathlon. Okay, quick, GO!
Got up at 4:30 a.m. and did the usual minus a dump. Headed out the door by 5:10 a.m. then had to turn back for home because I was obsessed I left the coffee pot on. Do you do that? Thing is, it wouldn’t have mattered if I did because it has automatic shut off, but I turned back anyway. It was off.
Hit the road again. Turned around again because I wasn't sure if I closed the garage door. Do you do that? It was closed. 99 eff’ing percent of the times I check the iron, the stove, the whatever, it is off. Zero risk. But, then I go jump out of a plane and go zip lining. It makes no sense.
I got to Boulder and it was pitch dark. I was way too early. I set up my transition and literally had 2 hours left to wait. So, I went home and checked the coffee pot again. Just kidding.
Scooby Doo towel rocks!
I visited the porta potties three times for a little pre-race cleansing:
Here’s the thing. This is a women’s only race, the first women’s only event I’ve ever done. For some reason I assumed the porta potties would smell better than at a coed race. But guess what? Big revelation. Everyone's shit smells. Women’s poop stinks as bad as men's (except for mine which smells like Chanel #5). I now know this. There is nothing feminine and pure about women’s poop. It is all the same.
I did enjoy, however, the short porta potty lines and the table with a linen cloth outside the johns that had a variety of yummy smelling antibacterial soaps. Nice touch, Iron Girl!
I caught up with Tara who was doing her first tri. It was great to see her out there. She had knee surgery this year and now is officially back in the game!!
Heading to the swim, no wetsuit:
Finally it was “go” time. This was an age group swim start. I decided to forgo the wetsuit since the swim was so short (1/4 mile) and the water was 72 degrees. It was a beach start, so you had to run in the water and dolphin dive in. I did more of a run in the water, get stuck in the mud and belly flop in, but that’s just me.
I don't know if it was nerves or the cool water, but I immediately lost my breath. I couldn’t catch it the whole swim. I swallowed mouthfuls of piss water and got off course a couple of times. It was short but not sweet.
Swim: 1/4 mile in 8:45
I thought I breezed through transition in like :02 seconds, but turns out it was over 2 minutes. What the hell? I seriously do not know what I was doing except for when I stopped to check the coffee pot.
Hit the road on the bike and started passing people like crazy. Settled in my aero bars and cranked it out. I actually felt pretty out of breath and my heart rate didn’t calm down until mile six or so. I took a Clif Shot halfway and this helped.
Three women in my age group (you have your age marked on your calf) passed me, then I passed them, then they passed me. I never saw them again. I knew for sure I had at least three AG women ahead of me, so no podium for me unless I caught them on the run, which I doubted by the looks of these maniacs. Plus, I figured there were more girls out there who finished the swim before me. Who knew where I stood?
There was another AG’er (cute girl in braids, kind of had a crush on her) who I played cat and mouse with the whole bike. On the homestretch she passed me, but I decided I would get her on the run (foreshadow). Maybe ask her for a date?
Bike: 17.2 miles in 51:31. Average speed: 20 mph
Going into the transition two area, someone cut in front of me and almost knocked me over with her bike. I turned into my row and could not for the life of me find my Scooby Doo towel. I actually spent about a minute looking. Ridiculous. Another shitty transition time.
Set out for the run. It was *HOT* at this point with no shade. I kept a pretty good clip. By mile 1 I passed my crush, the girl with the braids. Never saw her again. The run was uneventful, but I could feel myself running out of steam by the last mile. I could tell since it was an out and back course that I was near the top for finishers. I kept up the pace. My ass only ached a tiny bit, even though I worried about butt pain a lot last week.
Run: 3.1 miles in 24:20. Average pace: 7:48
Total time: 1:28:45
6th/164 age group
Some of my favorite life moments have involved crossing finish lines over the past two years. This was no exception. As I came down the finish chute, there were no runners near me, so I had my own little moment. I had no family or friends at the finish (well, Tara, but she was racing), so I just smiled and tried to pat myself on the back without looking double jointed. Go me!
After thoughts: I know 1:28 is a good time and I know I gave it my all, but I am super disappointed in my transition times. The two girls ahead of me who got the 4th and 5th spots finished only seconds before me. Their swim/bike/run times weren’t faster than mine (actually slower!), but their transitions were. If I hadn’t dicked around so long in transition, I could have easily been 4th. Oh well. Lessons learned. Something to work on for next time.
For now I am an Iron Girl. Hoping someday to grow up to be an Iron MAN.
PS: So much for a sprint race report.