Thursday, August 18, 2011

She Was a “Weener”

Emma starts school today.

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Fifth grade. One of my favorites. I recall ruling the school, or maybe that was just in my mind. I had many nicknames, none of which were SUAR or “sewer.” Most kids called me “Button Nose” because the tip of my nose goes flat at the end.

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I don't remember learning,  but I do know I was a safety crossing guard and that some friends and I had a secret club that met under a bridge. We were kind of like trolls.

I was a good student, but I went to school to see my friends foremost and learning anything was just a bonus. This is probably why I cannot remember the name of any of my teachers, except Ms. Weener. No kidding. If I were to become a teacher and my last name was Dick, Schlong or Weiner, I would change it. But, that’s just me.

I love this time of year. The return to school signifies a new start. Possibility.  Not just for my kids, but for me too. I still get teary watching her walk in that door.

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I will never see my ten year old start fifth grade again. Next year, she will start middle school and with that will come its own set of challenges and growing pains. Funny thing is, when my kids were itty bitty, I kind of wished the time away. Changing their diapers, spoon feeding them, getting up in the night for the 19th time. I wondered, “When will they do some of this stuff themselves? When will this non-stop parenting madness ease up a bit?”

But, now that they are older, I realize how short those years were and how quickly these years are zooming by. This is not rocket science, but it’s a reminder to pay attention, to not miss anything. We’re so busy thinking about what’s next all the time, that we sometimes forget to cherish what is right in front of us. All we really have is this moment.

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Probably does not get sweeter than dad and his little girl holding hands.

Ever have a teacher with a funny or profane last name? Just Weener. Funny enough.

What was your favorite grade in school? Mine were 5th & 8th, which is funny because these are the grades my kid will be in this year.

Did you/do you have any nicknames? Besides Button Nose,after college my friends called me “Betty” and “Booty.” I didn’t have a particularly large booty, but the name just stuck. Maybe it had something to do with the flatulence.

SUAR

53 comments:

  1. My college roomate is a teacher and before getting married her last name was Williams. After teaching for a year, she got married and her new last name is Fagg. Needless to say, she kept Ms. Williams as her "teaching name".

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  2. I think I would cheer when my kids go back to school (I don't have any kids yet).

    No real nick names.

    No funny teacher names either BORING!

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  3. I
    Loved
    This.
    Those photos. Keepers. For sure.
    Love them.

    Nicknames-yes. Too. Many.
    The one that makes me laugh???.."legs"
    Especially funny because it was a nickname my history teacher called me my freshman year.....ya that would so not happen these days [thank goodness].

    Loved fifth, sixth & eighth grade. 7th-not. So. Much.

    Again, button nose, I loved this post.

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  4. My 4th grade teacher's name was Mrs. Uranus.....cannot make this up. It took me a few years before I understood why my dad would crack up everytime he had to go to parent teacher conferences.

    -Jeny

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  5. "Ilana banana" (say it with a south african accent) and I hated it. Would punch people (mainly boys) when they called me that. Now I think it is SO sweet. I have a button nose too.

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  6. The years go by so fast and the moments so slow. But living here for this moment means that you truly appreciate what both bring to you! Beautiful first day of school!

    Teacher Name: 3rd grade: Ms. Roddy...we called her "Rudey" because she was so mean. She hated that.

    Nickname: Dutchess....because I wasn't quite high maintenance enough to be a Princess but more so than the average jane. Oh if they could hear my tooting runs now!

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  7. I totally just spelled my own name wrong and funny thing is my dad would look at my grades and say "You got 35% on this test cos you spelled your name right?"

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  8. My 8th grade science teacher was named "Mrs. Kiester"

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  9. My 12th grade English teacher was named Constance Payne. She penciled in her eyebrows in a way that gave her a look of perpetual surprise. I miss those days.

    When I worked for a dot com with a bunch of crazy people, they nicknamed me Dirty Sanchez. (Sheesh. You make one innocent remark over cocktails one night...)

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  10. 5th was my favourite because I had the bets teacher ever! I hope Emma has a great year.

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  11. For reals- my pre-calculus teacher in high school was named Dick Large. Like, he really went my Dick- not Richard. I swear I speak the truth :).

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  12. 4th and 11th were both good for me. Horner is the closest I got to a funny teacher name.

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  13. My friend's last name is Homo- and both her parents are teachers. Can you imagine how mean HS kids would be to a teacher named Mr. Homo?

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  14. No teacher, but I saw a doctor at one point named Dr. Dick. She was married, and I remember thinking she made a huge mistake. She either changed her name when she shouldn't have or should have taken the opportunity to change it and didn't.

    I used to get called Won-De-bra. Never thought it was funny...

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  15. My first-grade teacher's name was Dee Cupp. Poor lady.

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  16. We had a math teacher at our high school, Mr. Ball - first name: Richard. Yup, Dick Ball.

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  17. In 6th grade our PE coach was Coach Butts. Harry Butts. Okay, so it was really HENRY Butts. We all just secretly called him Coach Harry Butts.

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  18. Had a science teacher named Mr. Damp - that's about as wild as it got.

    Great pictures! I've definitely learned to not wish away the time - my kids are getting too big too fast!

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  19. Loved these pics! And this post =)

    Not my teacher - but at my school there was another teacher named Mr. Crapushuttes. (aka crap + sh**). Yeah, he went by Mr. C.

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  20. In highschool we had a teacher with the last name Woodcock, and the kids would call him silverdink. So mature!

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  21. Enjoy this year and next... after sixth grade they are in junior high and all of a sudden they aren't "kids" much anymore. They grow up WAY too fast.

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  22. I had a "Mrs. Dick. Her husband's name (who subbed on occasion) was Harry. I'm not kidding.

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  23. What sweet photos. 5th and 8th grades were so awesome, I really enjoyed those too. I also loved senior year, 'cause ya know, the whole excitement for college thing (not the fights with parents thing). I had a chemistry prof named Dr. Cox. He was like, 72 and totally nerdy and I loved him.

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  24. My daughter starts 5th grade on Tuesday. Last year in elementary school. Where did it go?

    No weird last names just a creepy science teacher in the high school. He is probably on a registery online some where. Gross!

    My nick name in grade school was Shelly Jelly. Which I h.a.t.ed! (spelled out because I don't say that word) I was beyond skinny but I have often wondered if that teasing didn't contribute to me "thinking" I was/others saw me as FAT.

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  25. i actually had a teacher Mrs. Weiner. no joke!!!!!!!

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  26. Oh, the elementary years are the sweetest for parents. Looking back (mine are now in college....I started my childbearing early)I can honestly say that those are the best years.

    No nicknames.

    No teachers with funny names. When you go to a Mennonite college, they're all either Yoder, Stutzman,
    or Wiebe.

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  27. Your thoughts on motherhood and your sweet pictures brought tears to my eyes. My 5th grader started yesterday (along with my 2nd grader). Our parochial school is K-8 so no major changes next year, but I do remember those years of wishing his babyhood away and regret that I didn't stop to appreciate how fast they would slip through my fingers. They do grow fast - like parenthood puts you into some kind of warp speed with the clock. Amazing!

    I had a Mrs. Snell for 4th grade, Mrs. Horn for art, Mrs. Long for music, Coach Sisson for P.E. and basketball, and Mrs. Slaughter for biology. There was a teacher at another school named Soda Popp and a friend at church whose maiden name was Candy Todd, but she married Curtis Treat - and took his name. Nothing too gross, but a little funny.

    Best wishes on a great school year!

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  28. I had a high school physics teacher named Dave Weiner. Serious, not making it up. That is a bad age group to teach with that name. I think I called him Mr Dave because I couldn't call him Mr Weiner with a straight face. He was the only HS teacher that I knew his first name because of it.

    I was called Bones in college. I was skinny and you could see all my ribs through my leotards, and everyone joked that if I ate an oreo or anything, you could see it sticking out like when a snake eats a mouse.

    I was excited for my daughter to start kindergarten this year. With our move, she really needed some structure and we didn't know any kids. Starting school has helped her make some friends. What I have not been prepared for is that our neighbor invites her over almost every day after school to play with her daughter. I miss her while she is at school, so sometimes I don't want her to leave again. Her brother misses her too.

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  29. Well, my middle school was called Wunderlich. Yeah, I know. It was hard to tell people (get it...). One day, we had this substitute teacher and her name was Miss Wunderlich (she was part of the family). I almost didn't make it through class. In fact, I think I got sent to detention wearing a shirt that said, "I'm Bart Simpson, Who the Hell are You?"

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  30. In 6th grade I had a teacher whose name was "Mr. Butt". It was supposed to be pronounced "Boot". I remember at 6th grade orientation for the parents and kids, they had signs up around the auditorium with all of the teachers' names on them. Mr. Butt's name was up there, and my dad said loudly, "MR. BUTT? IS THAT A JOKE?" I remember being MORTIFIED as a 6th grader, embarassed by my dad. Now I look back and think Mr. Butt should have been the one mortified with a name like that!

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  31. My daughter is turns one in less then 2 weeks. While I do look forward to her being able to use the bathroom, I don't know where the past year went. I need to remember to stop and enjoy the diaper changes

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  32. LOL, I remember going to school to be with all of my friends too. That learning thing somehow seeped in......

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  33. I love this. I need to remember to slow down as I sign my littlest up for preschool. I am so looking forward to 'freedom' but so weirdly sad that my kids are growing up. This may be part of why I kept having kids... even though I was soooo freakin old! lol

    There were teachers at my schools who had weird names... Mr. Dickey immediately jumps to mind.

    I LOVED 5th grade. I had the best teacher. I felt accepted. I did well. I learned how to 'do' school. I loved it.

    My nicknames were awful... Pokeynose (dude was trying to say Pinocchio... same diff... must've been ebonics), Tittyless, Brainiac, Curvepusher...

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  34. You are so right that the time flies by and you need to prepare yourself because middle school will go soooo much faster than elementary. If you think about it, they are in elementary for six years; middle school for three - just a blink of an eye. My daughter is going to be a junior. all I can think is "two more years? How and when did this happen? What was I busy doing? There's so much I haven't taught her; is it too late?".

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  35. Awww..I loved this. And the pics were awesome!
    My oldest starts Kindergarten next week and it's just crazy! You're so right about those years when they were little bitty going by in a flash!

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  36. Beautiful pictures. Time does go by quickly. My husband has a cousin who teaches third grade - Mrs. Fatz! One of the boy's not so nice teacher went from Mrs. Betts to Mrs. Butts courtesy of Mom ( I know, I am a bad example for my kids) Our favorite spanish teacher Mr. Celis-Salas is Mr. Ceasar Salad. As you know, my first name is Gladys-Maria - so yes, I was happy-butt and Gladysfriday:)

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  37. I was like you with my first two, wishing the time would pass but when my third, and last came along, I vowed to enjoy it more and be in the present. It made no difference. Our lives were so busy that it passed in a blink of an eye and now he's all grown up.

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  38. We had a guidance counselor by the name of Ann Horr.

    My nickname in 4th grade was TB Thomas because I came up with a positive Mantoux test during the class screening...

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  39. 1 - high school teacher - Diana Rhia
    2 - dad's name - Dick Cummins (goes by DC)

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  40. My cousin's last name was Bottom. When he was engaged his fiancee made him change his name because she was a teacher and her first name was Pat...so he changed it to "Sands." They later divorced and he remarried Sandy. So she is Sandy Sands...but she might have been Sandy Bottom. ;)

    Oh, and I was also button nose!

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  41. I attended a catholic school and my kindergarten teacher's name was Sister Conceptionne! No kidding! Now in Kdg we didn't get it...but it's funny now! :)

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  42. My third grade teachers name was Miss Roach!! I really didn't like her. Never had a nickname.

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  43. Okay first that post got me all teary eyed..cause I am in the wishing away stage of changing diapers. I think it was the pic of your daughter entering the school....gulp...i'm going to be crying like a baby on that day. Most annoying is that I will be teaching and won't be able to see her go..
    Ever have a teacher with a funny or profane last name? Just Weener. Funny enough.Well my last name is Johnson...not to bad but we have a Craps and Cummings also!

    What was your favorite grade in school? Favorite was third.

    Did you/do you have any nicknames
    Bonette...as in Boners sister annette....long story.

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  44. My 8th grade math teacher was named "Dick Brown". Yep. :) I am fortunate because my oldest is starting 5th grade, but I am his teacher (per his request). I am excited to share this adventure with him.
    My nickname was Stretch because I was/am so short, I had to stretch to reach everything. To this day, when I see many of my teachers and friends, they refer to me as Stretch.

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  45. I had a 10th grade English teacher named Mrs. Weiner. She was actually pretty cool, though.

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  46. My son starts Kindergarten on Monday. *sob* It goes by WAAAAAY to fast :(

    There was an English teacher at my high school with the last name Weiner -- and her husband was Richard - nn Dick. Yes - Dick Weiner.

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  47. My oldest starts kindergarten next week...it is breaking my heart...she is beyond excited....I'm a emotional wreck don't know where my baby went...she is counting down the days!!

    My nickname...Bambi, I was a competitive gymnast, could do Numerous floor routines and stick them every time, however would trip and fall walking up stairs, on flat surfaces...stupid stuff!

    had a Mr. DIE...ahahah he was a math teacher he caught shit constantly!

    good luck to those cute kiddos!! I hope they have a great year!

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  48. Not obscene, but our driver's ed teacher was Rex Easley. (Say it out loud. The driver's ed part is important.) I heard it was even in Reader's Digest. (For the youngsters, RD used to do headlines, etc. long before it occurred to Jay Leno ...)

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  49. we had an elementary school teacher named mr. butz. our gym teacher was mr. ball.

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  50. College professor named Dick Stones. Seriously, use the name Richard if ya got it.

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  51. My elementary P.E. teacher's name was Miss Durr

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  52. I was the teacher with the bad last name! I taught 7 and 8th grade and my last name is Schmidt. It doesn't take but a second for middle schoolers to figure out what that sounds like!

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  53. I did not have her, but there was a teacher at our high school named Anita Head. Just discovered your blog today and I am hooked!

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