Strolling at the Wynn
I’m back and let me give you a quick rundown so that I can go and remind my family of who I am. First question when I walked in the door from Emma: Want will you be making for dinner tonight? Answer: Toast.
I will work backwards a bit here and say that this trip was the shit because of the first time in going to Vegas for 9 years, I actually won enough money to cover my entire trip. It was a sweet, surreal moment that had me doing this:
In case you can’t tell, we were on the 60th freaking floor. Highest floor of the Wynn. When I checked in I said, “Don’t you all know who I am? I am SUAR. I demand the best room on the property.” If only. No one has a freaking clue who I am except you and my children and parents.
This fine tale of victory took place at the Hardrock last night. Erika and I walked in, it was kind of dead and we were adopted by a bunch of young 20-something's in town for a bachelor party. I was wearing a scarf, so I was called “scarf” for the night. And the scarf became very lucky – so much so that everyone rubbed their chips on the scarf for good luck. Remind me to dry clean that thing. Who knows where those chips have been. Here is the famous scarf. Target special.
The beers went down easy, the table got very rowdy and the pit boss had to get involved on a couple of occasions. One thing I have learned over the years is when to walk away, and I actually had the discipline to do it. I walked away a winner. I am a winner. And I like myself.
Our frat boys tried to pull the old, “what are you ladies doing later, want to party in our hot tub?” These kinds of things make me laugh my ass off. Let me get this straight. You want this 44 year old woman wearing a scarf and a wedding ring who is drunk off of two beers to party in your hot tub? Let me call my 13 year old son and see what he thinks.
Don’t they know it was already passed my bedtime and I had reached my drink limit for the day?
Instead, Erika and hooked up with an incredible sushi dinner at Wazuzu (Encore) and went to bed early. This morning’s workout sucked. I was dehydrated, exhausted. I barely got through a 60 minute run, but I did. I tell you, the Wynn Fitness Center is heaven. I walked into the spa changing room to put on different shorts (no, mine weren’t soiled. I was changing from bike shorts to running). It was insane in there. I stole a bunch of stuff including that lamp.
If I am ever homeless I am going to break into he Wynn spa and night and live there.
And I just love this picture because who doesn’t lie down at the slot machines?
Pretty much everything went well on the trip. I can only complain about a few things, because I have to.
- The weather sucked. It was 20 degrees cooler than normal. We were stubborn and tried to lay by the pool, but at some point you had to stop pretending the weather was nice and cut your losses. See how crowded it is?
Okay, the lifeguard is a bit overkill with the scarf thing. It wasn’t like we were in the middle of sandstorm.
We always go to the “European Pool” which is optional topless. I never go topless because who wants to see mosquito bites, but I like looking at other people’s boobs. Yesterday some woman had the nicest body on the planet. She was gorgeous. She took off her top and shared her perfect round perky fake boobs with us. We stared. Suddenly, security came up and escorted her out. I’m guessing she was looking to make some money. I was about to proposition her myself.
- The Wifi in our room didn't work. I complained to the front desk several times, mostly because you pay a mandatory resort fee of $20 per night for Wifi and Fitness Center and I wasn’t paying it if I didn’t get Wifi. So I put up a stink and got my way. And I spent a lot of time in the hall where the Wifi was plentiful. I’ll probably sue someone.
- I was boarding the plane out of Vegas today, got down the jet way and realized I left my suitcase in the bar. I had only had one drink and I still left my suitcase in the bar. I was wearing a shirt that says, “I run for wine,” and the United Guy called me “Girls Gone Wild.” I am not wild, I am just aging and forgetful. He let me go get my bag and all was well.
Other than that, perfect trip with my perfect friend. Despite the Wifi issue, I LOVE the Wynn. Great rooms, great pool with boobs, great games, really good food. Good customer service.
Good to be home, though. Now get to go love up my kids and hubby a bit more. I might even wear the scarf later if everyone is really nice.
Do you go on girls’ or guys’ trips?
Any vacations planned? After Costa Rica, Boston and Vegas, I think I’m done for awhile.
What are you making for dinner? Ken just went to get a rotisserie chicken and mashed potatoes.
Don’t forget to vote. Upper right hand corner. Give me the love. Everyday.