I won’t go into details, but to suffice it to say the shart is alive and well in Colorado! How’s that for elusive? That’s all I’m telling you. I like to be mysterious.
Today I went against my grain and ran on the treadmill. I simply could not take another day of navigating around the ice outside and nearly breaking a hip or freezing off a tit. Plus, I’m a pussy in the cold and I’m not afraid to admit it. I run a ton in freezing temps, but some days I want to be warm. Sorry, I just do. There will be plenty more chances to don the layers, run a few miles, shoot icy snot rockets onto the asphalt and spend the rest of the day trying to get warm by the poor man’s fireplace: the heating vent.
I find the treadmill boring, so I like to play games. I have little secret competitions with people around me. I know it’s childish, but it keeps me engaged. I like to outlast and outwit them all (Survivor reference). This is not hard to do when most people get on the ‘mill, run for 15 minutes like a bat out of hell, almost throw up and get off. I was successful and outplayed each and every one. Jeff Probst would have been proud.
Today I noticed once again the cell phone mania at the gym. People on the elliptical on phones, people everywhere on phones. I don’t have a problem with cell phones. In fact I have one with me usually in the treadmill holder thingee in case one of my children calls and is bleeding or choking or projective vomiting. But, something I do not do, and have never done, is talk on the phone while I’m working out. There are some things that are sacred, plus I can’t usually speak when I’m working out because I’m too busy breathing heavily (TWSS).
Here is where I hate seeing people talk on cell phones:
At the gym while working out
While having sex
While getting a massage
At table while eating with other people. Hello! There are live people to talk to right beside you!
In restaurants. Period.
While in the bathroom stall
At a funeral
In line for anything, especially when it’s their turn to order
At the movies
While under water
My favorite cell phone moments are when you are on a plane and it lands. People are grappling for their phones and everywhere you hear, “HI! We just landed!” I’ve been guilty of that one as well. What the hell did I do for those 30 years before I had a damn cell phone?
How do you survive treadmill boredom?
Any places you would not use your cell phone or get annoyed when people use theirs?
Yes, I did watch Survivor. Yes I am a huge Ozzie fan. No I don’t think Sophie should have won.