Thursday, December 15, 2011

Runners Are Whiners

Today I found out that as a marathoner, I am a whiner and a rich snob who hates Las Vegas and only shops at Whole Foods. So are you. Well, at least that’s how Patrick Coolican, author of an article in the Las Vegas Weekly yesterday, pegs all of us runners. Talk about stereotypes and judgments!

Mr. Coolican starts off the article describing the snafu that was the Las Vegas Rock and Roll Marathon. He then goes on to say:

“Put that aside for a moment and consider the people who run marathons and how they might be the kind of people who enjoy a fine whine.

I used to live in Seattle, so I know them. They went to Stanford or USC and work at technology or consulting firms or have already made so much money that they’re stay-at-home dads or moms or started their own nonprofit. They shop at Whole Foods but eat only 1,200 calories a day. They voted for President Obama and felt so darned good about it. They consider the twice-annual sale at REI a religious event. They are the modern Organization Man and so can’t understand why the marathon didn’t go off with the efficiency of their second child’s midwifed home birth. They are the anti-Las Vegas. So, let’s be skeptical of their complaints.”

Here’s what I have to say to Mr. Coolican:

  • I love Las Vegas. I go there at least twice a year and give a great deal of money to your fine city. For this race alone I spent $165 to register and hundreds of additional dollars on hotels, food and gambling to boost your economy. You are welcome.
  • I came to Vegas to have a good time and to run a race. The race was great. The 5 hour wait to get back to my hotel and the 36 hours of nausea after the race was not.
  • I eat at least 2,000 calories a day, more if there are Christmas cookies around.
  • I don’t shop at Whole Foods because I can’t afford it and I like my chicken with hormones and antibiotics in it.
  • Doesn’t REI stand for Religious Event Inc?
  • I didn't have a home birth or a midwife. I had a hospital birth with an OB and a nurse who wiped my ass.
  • I don't have my own non-profit. Yet. When I do it will be to fundraise for runners who need counseling because their water did not stay cold enough during their run and their shoes came untied too often. We really are a weak and whiney bunch. That is why we run 26.2 miles for fun. Have you ever done that Mr. Coolican?

P1110664P1110665

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is me whining. As a runner, this is how I look 99.8% of the time

Mr. Coolican shrugs off his article stating he was only trying to “provoke and have a little fun.” Yeah, yeah, supposed to be a joke and all that. But when you’re dealing with many people who ended up in ERs and had their weekends spoiled due to illness, not so funny.

I still think he comes across as a self righteous douche bag, but that’s just me.

What do you think? Are runners an entitled, elitist bunch or was he way off base?

What would you say to Mr. Coolican?

SUAR

PS: When I first looked at the article, the title was, "Our marathon was the source of much complaining but how much of it was justified," and now it's "Preliminary testing does not point to water.” Interesting that he went back and changed it 24 hours later!

90 comments:

  1. I read that article... I thought he came off as a jerk. As a runner, I thought his generalizations were rude. As a Las Vegas resident, I thought it was patronizing to those who do come to our city and those of us who live here. Overall, a failed piece of "journalism."

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mr. Coolican is obviously a self-absorbed funktard.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I read that too! I didn't run it, but I was so pissed off! He completely missed the point of all the complaints. He also made gross and incorrect statements about a very large and diverse group of people who were just being tourists in his city.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I would say "cheers, mr. Coolican…see you

    ReplyDelete
  5. At the finish line!"

    Sorry! My phone freaked out .

    ReplyDelete
  6. It did fire me up but then you made me laugh. Prolly shouldnt do that when firing us up Beth ;) Add chalkmark to douchebag column

    ReplyDelete
  7. He is just as you say nothing but a douche bag! What nerve!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ugh, as a runner who lives in Seattle, well, let's just say his stereotyping was way off base.

    a. I don't make a lot of money, which leads to:
    b. I can't afford to shop at Whole Foods although I will wander through Trader Joe's once in a while
    c. I run to eat, so I consume >1200 calories a day.
    d. Yes, the REI sale is holy.

    However, I understand that there may be bumps in the road to putting on a race. I try not to complain unless it is legitimate. Why would anybody that is anti-Vegas go to Vegas in the first place? His logic is way of. That guy is full of himself. Ugh.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yeah we might be whiners when we talk about our sore knees, sore toes, sore hips and busted toenails but we are not whiners we are talking about a race that was so poorly done people were injured and sick. I am so upset about what happened in Vegas I am not running a race in St. Louis that I have PAID for!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Not a very precise description of runners, maybe triathletes or just most people from Seattle, but not necessarily runners (-:

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'd like to see him run even a 5K!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Jeff - triathletes aren't any more snobbish or whiney than those who simply run. We just have two additional sports to eat for, shop for, train for, and whine and bitch about. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  13. The REI sale is definitely a religious event. Also, I do not shop at Whole Foods because the nearest one is about a 45-minute drive. My organic all-grass-fed unicorn-fart-flavored ice cream would melt by the time I got home.

    More importantly, I have to agree with one of the comments on the original article which said something like, "I read your article twice and it's still not funny."

    ReplyDelete
  14. What a douche .. I wanna smack him.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I actually think it was pretty funny! Kind of pegs it, on a large level! Gotta keep a sense of humor and enjoy life laughing!

    ReplyDelete
  16. "I used to live in Seattle, so I know them" <--what does that even mean? What a jackass.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Candace: parts were funny, but if you were at the race and got sick, not so funny.

    ReplyDelete
  18. LOL. Journalism at its finest. His mother should be proud. Generalize much?

    ReplyDelete
  19. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Ha! You look so much "whinier" as a runner.

    I kind of laughed off the article...I'm a Stanford grad and NOT wealthy in the least, nor do i shop a REI like the article mentioned. And, I generally almost shit myself and/or puke at the end of a hard run....BUTT, the event needs improvement (and so does the water)! :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. So in other words, you voted for Obama!...Good for you ;).
    Martina

    ReplyDelete
  22. I live in Seattle. I do not shop at Whole Foods. I do not shop at REI. I gave birth in a Seattle hospital with a nurse and my OB/GYN. I do know a lot of people who work at Microsoft but are not jerks like the author. I'm glad he left Seattle. By the way, I DO love a fine WINE, but the douchewaffle who wrote the article probably wouldn't recognize one if he drank it.

    ReplyDelete
  23. He is so far off base about runners! But we all knew that. Whiners? Really? RUDE! Douche bag big time.

    I have never been inside Whole Foods.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Funktard... My new favorite word. Sounds like he couldn't think of anything better to write about.

    ReplyDelete
  25. What a jerk! I ran Vegas, I got sick after, I whined. However, I am not rich, I have a job, and I did not go to Stanford. I didn't find his article even mildly amusing, but it did make me want to throw-up some more.

    ReplyDelete
  26. While I would agree that marathoners/triathletes can be somewhat elitists, I think it is justifiable. Being an elitist, that is. I mean, when you look at the percentage of people that do marathons and compare them to the general population of obesity, sure, we do feel pretty darn good about ourselves and should! (maybe that is my triathlete talking).

    Anyway, I am as republican as they come. I don't shop at whole foods, it is too expensive, but I DO love REI. I ordered stuff today in fact :)

    Anyway, the whole point of running a race is that you have support, ie sound nutrition and medical, along the way. Isn't that what all the money is for? That and the official timing, which is standard technology these days even in a inexpensive 5K. I have never been to vegas, so I am glad I didn't do this race, as I probably would not have liked it, but I can see how people would.

    ReplyDelete
  27. My upcoming May half marathon is a christmas present from my parents because I am so poor I cannot afford it myself and compared to the 165 dollar las vegas marathon, mine is significantly less and I STILL can't afford it. But I want to be in shape and I love running and my awesome running partner will be running with me. The only time I shop at whole foods is when I crave their seeduction rolls and they cost 75 cents. Thanks. I feel so elitist now it hurts.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Dag nabit! I run 5ks and I'm a whiner too!

    I'm also the 99%

    ReplyDelete
  29. Apparently I have had my head in the sand because this is the first I heard about the Vegas situation. That's really a shame. And that columnist is unbelievable. Okay, yes I shop at Whole Foods when I can, but I think the only time I've eaten only 1200 calories in a day was the last time I had the stomach flu. And I might whine sometimes, but still less than a lot of folks I know. ;) His supposed humor was not amusing (and I am not above poking fun at myself), particularly when people got seriously ill. Two thumbs down!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Show me where snobby elitists are willing to pee on the side of the road with tons of people passing by, don't get embarrassed by puking and wiping off their faces with their shirts and think it is totally acceptable to talk about GI issues at the dinner table with strangers.... then maybe I can call us runners that.

    I'm a runner and Las Vegas is my favorite vacation destination. I can't get enough of it. Perhaps I'm not a runner after all. Dammit. Must send back all of those compression socks and running skirts I guess. I'll sure miss my scratched up Garmin. :(

    ReplyDelete
  31. I live in Seattle and am embarrassed that he ever lived here. I don't know any runners who would fit his description. When he crosses the finish line after 26.2 then pukes and passes out due to contaminated water on the course, then he can talk. Whine on!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I love this: "Doesn’t REI stand for Religious Event Inc?"

    ReplyDelete
  33. Total douche. Runners come from all walks of life. Lame article.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I didn't even run Vegas and I want to take his balls and shove them up his ass.

    ReplyDelete
  35. I know people who ran the marathon, pr'd (sub 3:30) and didn't get sick and didn't have any problems at the finish line. Guess it's a matter of perspective!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Anon: yeah I guess all those sick people just had the wrong perspective, huh? What?? Makes no sense whatsoever.

    ReplyDelete
  37. I think I'd invite Mr. Coolican to train for at least one race greater than a 5K, or to reach a new PR for any previously held 5K time. I'd rather see him put in the work and sweat, and see if that clarifies why we run. My guess is that he would meet the wide variety of personalities and background that comprise the running community, and hopefully be humbled to change his vary narrow view.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I read that earlier today. Ugh. Major douche bag. Blame the runners. Seems responsibility doesn't work for anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Haha I love your response to his load of BS! You nailed it. People from all walks of life run marathons: young, old, wealthy, not so wealthy, etc. If he ever seriously spectated (or god forbid RAN) a race he'd see that in a second. What an a-hole.

    ReplyDelete
  40. The beauty of running is that it is NOT elitist. All you need is a pair of shoes. No special equipment. No expensive gym membership. No training.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Coolican's post gives journalism a bad name. I am a multimedia news copy editor and I have a degree in journalism, and unless his article is CLEARLY marked as an opinion, this is something journalists should NEVER do.
    Plus, he's a moron. You rock, SUAR.

    ReplyDelete
  42. When I read that this morning, I had no words-- the arrogance of that piece on top of the ignorance. You'd think a journalist would have the basic skills to research disease vectors. It didn't have to come from the water at the source. It could have come from just one careless individual.

    All those 'runners' he 'knows', yeah whatever... reads to me like somebody took a bite of a sour grape.

    ReplyDelete
  43. I am the opposite of every single thing he said... except that I'm a runner. Ummm... way off base, Mr. Head Up Your Ass.

    ReplyDelete
  44. You say douche bag, I say A$$ WIPE! After he runs a marathon, pukes for 3 days and still thinks it's all 'kittens and rainbows' then maybe he has the right to be a jerk off. Otherwise keep your 'fun provoking' to yourself Jerkwad!

    ReplyDelete
  45. wow. F. him.

    Fricken awesome response. I love the whiney face pics.

    ReplyDelete
  46. If I had even ten seconds with him, I would ask him what his finish time was. Because, obviously, he ran the marathon to make such comments as these.

    I hope somebody writes a really good follow up that includes information about how many runners ended up in the ER that night. I think sick people earn the right to whine, runner or not.

    PS - Running keeps my emotions in check so I don't whine all day long. And I know I'm not the only one.

    ReplyDelete
  47. I am a new runner and am apalled at the things written in this article. No one who has attempted even a 5k would say those things about other runners. Running is hard, it takes time & effort... it can be very painful. Only another runner can understand the joy that comes out of a good run.
    I think he needs some "joy" - what a narrowminded petty little man.

    People were super sick in LV...it was terrifying. He should have a few more facts before he spews such crap.

    And to all the Seattle living, educated, Microsoft working, running FABULOUS, HEALTHY runners out there --- WE LOVE YOU... even if you can afford whole foods.

    ReplyDelete
  48. I do believe the biggest whiner and douchebag is him.

    He does not know what the h3ll he is talking about.

    ReplyDelete
  49. That is horrible! Ignorance isn't funny. I would say more but I wouldn't want to be a whiner.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Oh, yeah- elitist Seattlites with our fleece and goretex wearing selves. I don't shop at Whole Foods, douchebag- I shop at PCC. They have the good pickles.

    I love the whiny face. And if runners are whiny it is surely because they are masochists who prefer to deal their own punishment.

    ReplyDelete
  51. He hasn't met a lot of triathletes then has he.
    He'd have a ball spending a day with my tri club... 90% of them genuinely are elitist pigs.

    I just hang around to remind them all that they suck :)

    ReplyDelete
  52. He is stereotyping based on the entry fee for this race, is my guess.

    I mean I think it's possible the high race fee played into the clientele who ran this race, if you will -- as opposed to who might sign up for the no frills $35 race out in the cornfields of their hometown. And I say this because I did not run it and I don't think I would pay $165 either. So I'm not the clientele RNRLV wants.

    But to make general statements about runners in this fashion is inappropriate. So he receives a "fail" on that.

    ReplyDelete
  53. I think that Mr. Coolican has totally missed the mark on this one, and must be basing his marathoner stereotype on the two that he's overheard in line at the local Starbucks. Should the man dare to leave his laptop and actually attempt a 5k, let alone the dedication and strength it takes for a marathon, he might see that there's an actual UPside to running and taking care of oneself. I was not there, and it sounds like some people had a horrific experience at Las Vegas, and others did just fine. I think that the organizers for the event should be lucky nothing more tragic happened and plan better for the future. With all that being said, at least we got to see a SEXAY photo of you =)

    ReplyDelete
  54. This guy totally missed the boat. Of course, that was intentional, since it's hard to make fun of the aspects of the race that were, from the reports I've read, downright dangerous. People throwing up after an endurance event is not unusual, although it's often a result of the heat and it wasn't hot in Vegas. Overcrowded public places and lack of sufficient medical staff is unacceptable. I guess we should all start learning to expect mediocrity...

    ReplyDelete
  55. I only enjoy half of a fine whine since I have never completed a full marathon, but I would tell him that I DO enjoy whining about how my quads and calves feel after an AWESOME, smoking long run. As opposed to those who enjoy laying around on their couch writing whiny articles about whiners and whining about how bad their backs and knees feel because they didn't use the body and joints they were blessed with. I will take our kind of whining any day.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I think that what happened in Las Vegas went above and beyond minor complaining.... Truly there are no words for what happened there and quite frankly, the ramifcations I think are bigger than they know. It's making me second guess registering for any super large events in the future... What a goof....

    ReplyDelete
  57. If he wants to be skeptical of those complaints he should read race reports of OTHER marathons...I'm pretty sure some of us have said absurd things like, "Miles 22 through 26 were the most fun" and "I can't wait for Sunday's marathon". Obviously runners underestimate pain and annoyance, not whine unreasonably!
    PS I have never been to Vegas and I decided that I hate it. Just like that. Just to be a snob. 'Cause I can!

    ReplyDelete
  58. Great rebuttal. What a pompous, generalizing DOINK.

    ReplyDelete
  59. I eat 2,000 calories a day, shop at Giant Eagle (local grocery store in the Midwest) and work a crappy desk job. I would love to see this guy run a marathon, Put weeks into training for something and then have a crappy race experience that you could not control. What a douche!

    ReplyDelete
  60. What? That's so ridiculous. He's wining about people wining. Someone needs to get their mood in check. I suggest he take up running.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Agreed - FUNKTARD is my new fave word. Will try to use it this weekend. The guy is way off base on the whole.

    ReplyDelete
  62. I am glad I read this article via you cos you put so much humor in it. People would have found me screaming at my computer screen if I didn’t read it with your twist. I have shopped at REI once cos it was my birthday and I got everything on sale. I took up running cos it is cheap (and cheaper than therapy). The last time, correction, the only time I shopped at whole foods was to use a Living Social deal ($20 for the price of $10) and I bought meat for a Thanksgiving potluck dinner. I am able to take out an entire army’s food supply because I run and as SUAR said I run 26.2 miles for fun… Call me rich, whiny snob again, I dare you.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Beth
    Please send this in as a reply to the drivel Mr C wrote. It is awesome. Sound like he is the city-centric snob who can't take valid criticism.
    Merry Christmas to him.

    ReplyDelete
  64. I think I'm going to move to Seattle and start running there so that I can be a stay at home mom and millionaire. That makes about as much sense as Mr. "Cook"-I-Am

    ReplyDelete
  65. What a tool. I could see him joking in the article a bit if he were compassionate and apologizing as well. Douche is just a funny word. I agree with you wholeheartedly Beth! Wow, i haven't run a marathon yet, but ran a 1/2, trained in my worn-out shoes on my tready while my 2 tots watched "educational" tv in the other room, took my own snacks and spaghetti and stayed in a hole of a hotel to save $$. Yeah, okay. Stereo-type much Mr UNcoolican? ha

    ReplyDelete
  66. Don't you just love it when someone has judgment about something they have never experienced!

    ReplyDelete
  67. If he wanted to provoke people, he succeeded. What a jerk!

    ReplyDelete
  68. He's an asshole. Geez. And rude. And I think you should write the paper (I would had I been able to go). Let them know how you feel. Address each point. And, by the way, I wish some of that were true....

    ReplyDelete
  69. amyscrubs@yahoo.comDecember 16, 2011 at 9:04 AM

    I too go to Vegas twice a year at least, I got married there! LOVE vegas! Had a great weekend in Vegas. Hubby and I have run in over 25 states and he has run in 30+ marathons and ultras. Plain and simple...this race sucked. I find that retarded statements like the dribble coming out of this man's mouth usually come from people that they themselves only wish could get off the couch, shut up, and just run!!

    ReplyDelete
  70. I agree. Nice rebuttal! What a stupid ass.

    ReplyDelete
  71. OMG!!!! Great blog Beth! You totally said what we all believe! Thank you....

    ReplyDelete
  72. Wow as someone from Seattle I am none of those things! Just another douche who wants to be heard. :)

    ReplyDelete
  73. What a bitch. That is all.

    (Him, not you. ;) )

    ReplyDelete
  74. He's obviously never seen the lines for the communal nasty porta-potties at the start line and I'm sure he's never actually be on the INSIDE of one of those things. Thanks for the laugh, he's proven himself a total douche clown!

    ReplyDelete
  75. He's obviously never seen the lines for the communal nasty porta-potties at the start line and I'm sure he's never actually be on the INSIDE of one of those things. Thanks for the laugh, he's proven himself a total douche clown!

    ReplyDelete
  76. I think he just needed some attention.

    ReplyDelete
  77. I read his comments; I cried; I called my Mommy.

    ReplyDelete
  78. What kind of a name is "Coolican" anyway? It's the name of a funktard, that's what kind it is. (Jamoosh, u rock, LOL).

    ReplyDelete
  79. Wow, I find runners to be among the nicest people I know. They are friendly and helpful. Didn't like 7 people stop running in a marathon this year to help a man who collapsed minutes from the finish line???

    ReplyDelete
  80. Jerk For sure.....but you know what's funny is people at my work think I am crazy to run so much and that I don't eat !!! It hilarious ! They JUST DON'T GET IT ! Maybe they DO need to "drink the juice" !

    ReplyDelete
  81. Jerk For sure.....but you know what's funny is people at my work think I am crazy to run so much and that I don't eat !!! It hilarious ! They JUST DON'T GET IT ! Maybe they DO need to "drink the juice" !

    ReplyDelete
  82. He is just like most of the journalists I know (and used to work with). Ugh.
    He is the bigger whiner.

    What would I say to him?
    "Mr. Coolican, come chase me. Don't stop till I stop. Are you up for that?"

    ReplyDelete
  83. By the way, I have never been to Whole Foods. I am not rich. I have to go to a job and smile and deal with drama. I don't shop at REI.

    ReplyDelete
  84. Put aside for a moment and consider the people who write crap for a living and miraculously get paid for it.

    They used to live in Seattle, didn't go to Stanford or USC and don't work at technology or consulting firms. They got a journalism degree, but aren't talented enough to work at a respected publication, and walk around with a chip on their shoulder.

    They're pissed off that they can't afford to shop at Whole Foods, eat 3,200 calories a day, and resent folks who pay attention to their diet.

    They don't have the drive, discipline, or wherewithal to train and finish an event as grueling as running 26.2 miles, and have no conception of what it takes. Instead, they'd rather sit behind their keyboard and poke fun at folks who are upset for valid reasons.

    Douche bag, indeed.

    ReplyDelete