Saturday, February 12, 2011

Lets Go Deep

Today I’m thinking a bit. I know, weird. But, before I think too deep, I need to let you know I’m making cake balls. Ever had a cake ball? Or just a plain ball? Cake balls rock the universe. Cake with icing shaped into a ball and dipped in more icing. Could also be called cake testicles if you prefer.

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Remember that post I did a few days ago about finding your fire and fighting your demons? That post got a lot of response and resulted in amazing emails. Some of you all candidly shared your personal challenges from relationship breakups to cancer diagnoses. I think the theme resonated with people because our pain gets so big and all encompassing that sometimes we can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. I guess we all need to be reminded that there is a light, there is hope, regardless of the circumstances.

That’s why I was surprised to get this comment on that post:

anoncomment1

To which I kindly responded:

anonresponse

This brings up a good discussion point.

The intention of the post was not to minimize the chaos, trauma and pain in the world. The intention was not for me to focus on just me and to have a pity party. This post was initially about my experience that day, and the 120 preceding days  I have struggled with this injury. The post then became about the universal experience of suffering.

My question to you is this: Do you believe that because there are people much worse off than we are, that we are never allowed to talk about our pain? Does sharing our struggles mean that we don’t sympathize with dire and devastating challenges that so many people face? Why does one have to exclude the other?

Sometimes I talk with a friend who has lost both of her parents. While their deaths occurred years ago, her grief lives on and can be incredibly painful. She will inevitably apologize for feeling sad and say, “I know it could be so much worse. There are people who suffer so much more than I do.” True. There will always be greater suffering. But, I let her know that just because someone else might have it worse, doesn’t mean she has to feel guilty about sharing her pain.

I believe that if we are compassionate and kind, not overly self focused, and can reach out to one another with good intention, sharing our struggles builds beautiful connections and lasting bonds. I’m all over it. What do you think?

‘Nuff said,

SUAR

P.S.: Don’t forget to enter my giveaway to win a free entry to this year’s Boston Marathon!! Ends tomorrow at 5pm Mountain.

66 comments:

  1. What a terribly rude and COWARDLY thing for Mr. Anon to say.

    Just because we aren't all in the same situation, doesn't mean we aren't allowed to FEEL. Grief and pain are relative. To say that someone is not allowed to struggle through certain setbacks in their life (even if it is missing a "damn PR") is condescending and judgemental. What an ass.

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  2. These things really frustrate me. Of course there are always going to be worse situations, but feelings are feelings. I wrote on my blog the other day that my blog is about my feelings during this moment, this day. you know what i might wake up feeling totally different the next day, so get over it and if you don't like what i am saying please read someone else. Good response to a real jackass!

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  3. I think its all about your perspective. There is always going to be someone who points out that someone else has it worse. Yes, we are aware. and yes, we thank God for the blessings he given us. We pray for those less fortunate. But God cares about the little things too, like running, and its healthy to share your frustrations. We are always here to support each other, no matter what its about.
    Cheers!
    LC

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  4. I've been reading your blog for a very long time. You have only been very humbling when talking about your injury and your desire to get back to running. I think you are grateful for what you have and have never acted imo on this blog else wise.

    You are sharing your journey with people who may one day be in your position and it's hopeful. Determination is what you have and that's what everyone should be reminded of when they see ANYONE facing a return to normalcy following an injury.

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  5. This is your blog. You can write about whatever you want. Yet, not only have you posted about your injury with great positivity and awareness, you've started interesting dialogs and encouraged a lot of sharing and commiseration over any kind of setback.
    Don't let the Anon posts get to you. This is your space to share what you want. And you're doing a great job with it. I love your blog and really look forward to your posts (as a fellow sufferer of a stress fx!)

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  6. BEth, you bring up such a good topic. I think that is part of whsat social networks, friendships, family units and relationships of all kind are for...to be a support system and a structure for us to lean on through the good and the bad. Everyone has a different life and just because one person's suffering is worse than another's is no reason for us not acknowledge and validate our own difficulties...no matter how little they are. Admitting our own pains and struggles to others is part of growing and being active in our life rather than stuffing it all and becoming a repressed, angry, and victimized person that ends up living an unhappy life. We can vent, cry, express ourselves and our frustrations and hopefully be validated by those that love us and are there for us. And then we move on and up. Sharing and being supported in our personal struggles doesn't in any way make light of the dark and awful suffering in the rest of the world. There will always be someone suffering more but that doesn't make our struggles too small to talk about. Talking about our frustrations and struggles only helps to give us what we need to work through things and be a brighter US. And you Beth, are a person that gives back to the world and makes it a better place so you keep venting and sharing your struggles and taking care of yourself. The world needs you! ;)

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  7. Sarah's got it right. And let's be compassionate to Anon. Pain manifests itself in many ways, some times aggressively and unpleasantly.

    Keep being inspired and keep inspiring.

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  8. I agree with you. It seems competitive, successful runners get that often. People tell me how they wish they could run/walk a 5k etc..But because of whatever is holding them back they can't.

    Well, I think we are blessed to have this gift of fitness, determination, a little OCD and some killer quads. However, it's not like we don't train my asses off for it. C'mon respect those who have it! Just the same way we would respect anyone else.

    And um, of course a pr in every race is usually the goal! Hello, it's the mindset of the competitive runner!! Nothing wrong with that!
    Cheers!

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  9. i was guilty of this a few days ago while complaining about my 32 year old acne and needing a weekend away from my kids. then i thought of my cousin who will be going through her 2nd open heart surgery in a few wks and a friend just diagnosed with a crazy brain cancer. i pray for them daily and know i am so lucky to have such minor issues to complain about. at the same time, as those above pointed out we all have our "issues" that take focus in our lives and we must deal. you've got support here girl!

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  10. Damn it, I thought the title was going to mean something else!!!!!!! Keep doing what you do.......

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  11. Pain is pain. It's not a contest! I believe any mental anguish should be met with validation and empathy.

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  12. Umm yeah. Its your blog. You post whatever you want to say. Of course we realize there are others who have it worse, but that doesnt mean we have to talk about them all the time.

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  13. A few weeks ago my mother landed herself in the hospital for what almost became a life or death situation. I flew out to Montana to be with her. I sat there in the hospital all day.....until she threw me out the door each afternoon and insisted that I go for a run and breath in the crisp mountain air. My mother, an avid downhill skier might never see a set of Nordic tracks again but believe that she would frown upon my never complaining about my shitty run or gluteal muscles or trying to find a place to pee in the snow ever again. He's trying to compare apples and oranges. Beth...these our are lives, as runners this is what we share and it in NO WAY means that we've lost perspective or compassion for those who are in need or are suffering. He's probably just jealous that he didn't come up with that awesome banana with frosting on the tip coming out of the cake.

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  14. YOu know what I just read that comment and couldn't go any further. When I had my femur fracture I had a fellow runner give me "Pep" talk.. how I should be thankful I have 5 kids blah blah.. SHUT THE HELL UP! I know perfectly well there are people who can't even walk, who have had horrible things thrown on them BUT I was hurting and I should have been allowed that. I hate it when people tell you how good you have it. WE know that!!!! Damn it let us feel frustrated and angry! You should feel bad, cry, yell, what ever! It hurts, it sucks.. it gets better.

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  15. wow!!! there will always be someone worse off than you in any circumstance. thats no reason that you should not feel anguish and pain about your own experience. thankfully my daughter is mildly affected by joubert syndrome, we could be dealing with far more difficult symptoms....BUT we still have pain, disappointment, struggles, grieving, etc because she has JS....things didnt go as planned and it sucks. i sometimes feel guilty talking to other JS parents about haley's abilities because their kids are wheelchair bound, will never walk, cannot talk, or their child has died. but they always remind me not to feel guilty for venting about my comparatively minor frustrations and pain. im glad that you have a place that you can express yourself and document your journey and struggles. screw whoever that was for trying to make you feel bad about venting. whatevs....nuff said!

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  16. Just because others are going through worse things, it doesn't mean that our own pain isn't real. I get really ticked off when people won't accept or offer sympathy because Others Have It Worse. Of course, they do!

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  17. you can totally talk about your pain / hardships. there will ALWAYS be someone out there that is more pain / worse off but it doesn't minimize what you're going through. and it's silly to hold in what you're thinking / feeling. talking to others helps with the healing process.

    so keep blogging :)

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  18. It's unhealthy to cover your pain because you tell yourself, "others have it worse". While true, that doesn't mean your pain isn't real and shouldn't be delt with.

    If you don't deal, you'll never heal.

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  19. Lots of good comments, some of which I was going to say. Believe it or not. Gotta be quick to get a comment in here before someone says it first.

    Most of us on our blogs talk about race results and daily training, and the various adventures that befall us. Saying that my knee hurt (or anything else hurt) during a run doesn't mean I think that's more important than all the other shit that's happening to other people. It's just happening to me on that day, one of many things. Not bragging or complaining, just noting that it is.

    And yes, it could be much worse. I know perfectly well there are people that would give anything they have to be able to walk across the room and hug a loved one, and that a bit of knee pain is trivial in the great scheme of things. As far as I know, there isn't a contest to see who's pain or suffering is the worst.

    I'm happy every day that I can get up and be active. That isn't intended to put down people that can't or won't, or brag about doing it, or complain that I'm not doing it better. It just is. When I write about how long it took to go some distance, it's for my own reference. To see if I improve over time. I'm proud of my results, and it doesn't bother me in the slightest almost everybody else in triathlon can do it quicker.

    I believe that we all can be happy with what we can do, yet still yearn to do better, while empathizing with those who can't. I got hell once from a guy in a wheelchair because I held the door for him. He thought I was doing it out of pity, or that I thought he couldn't open the door himself. He didn't seem to want to believe that I'd have held the door for any other person, disabled or not, that was where he was at the time.

    There is a line between sharing your pain, and burdening someone with it. Sharing can help lessen pain, and help those around you understand why you're not your usual self. Constantly going on and on about your pain, or trying to make them feel guilty, is burdening other people.

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  20. So there was that thing I posted about the other day…I was part of a support group in which the experiences ranged in "severity". As new members would join and learn the group leader's story, they would invariably apologize because "my story is not nearly as bad as your story." She would tell them that our stories are our own, fraught with our pain and fought through our struggle, and no one should ever minimize their own pain and struggle because someone else's seems worse. I think Anon is a person in a world of hurt about something. You go, SUAR. Keep on keepin' on with this bad ass blog.

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  21. I broke a finger nail this week. It hurts a lot.

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  22. We all need to vent. And that is a healthy thing to do, because then we can move on. So, vent in any way you want!

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  23. Oh my god I never comment on blogs, but you are awesome... spot on every time and I just love that! Love you!

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  24. I know that in the absolute scheme of things (compared to others and their experiences), I am so incredibly fortunate, starting with the fact of my very birth under some twitchy medical circumstances, and being born when where and to whom I was born. I try to keep in mind all my blessings and advantages as well as the hard work I've put in. In the relative (within my own life) perspective, I have and have had some challenges, struggles and pain, and sometimes I talk about it, complain about it, all that stuff. I do struggle a bit with it when I complain, but am often reassured by people who I am embarrassed if I complain to (because they've dealt with so much more) that I can express how things are to me in my life without diminishing their experiences. Some of my experiences even help me have more compassion for others, whether their struggles are - in absolute value terms - big or small, because for them, it's relative. Almost everyone is struggling with something, and it's a challenge of each of us not to judge or evaluate someone else's experience against our own or the wider world's. Keeping both the absolute and relative frames in mind, and keeping in mind that all of us want to be happy and healthy and avoid pain and suffering - that's the way to go. Sharing struggles is very helpful for those on both sides - I know I've been helped by sharing my problems and I've been happy to support when others need to share - I hope I give in receiving. A sorrow shared is a sorrow halved; a joy shared is a joy doubled. Rock on, SUAR!

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  25. There are catstrophic problems and problems that are catstrophic to you. Just because there is unrest and tragedy in Darfur doesnt mean I dont worry about my sons terrible butt rash. There are levels and a spectrum and its good to grasp the whole picture especially if you tend to wallow in self pity. But we are all allowed a pass to feel sorry for ourselves and not contrast that against the abused dogs in that damn Sarah Mclaughin commercial. I have a bad knee, I rolled my ankle because of my new stupid gait, I limped like a 3 legged cat through a run today and I cried. I mourn guilt free cupcakes and I am pissed at the 60 year old man that passed me power walking. Its my right. And its your right. As long as you dont turn bitter or into an ass your allowed a moment with out preface. The end.

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  26. You know, it's always helpful to me to remind myself that others have it worse than I do. It's not necessarily helpful for other people to remind me of that when I need a few minutes to vent.

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  27. You are a very positive person even with your injury. When I come to your blog I always leave smiling or laughing or feeling uplifted. That's what the world needs more of. Our perception is our reality. I wrote a post about some of my own experiences with these types of negative people a month or so ago. It pretty much sums up what I think of comments like the one you shared. The comment was not an attempt to make you feel grateful it was an ill disguised attempt to make you feel bad. The good news is you get to decide how you feel regardless of what they said.
    Here is a link to my old post if you're interested in more of my wise wise words (just teasing)! Keep rockin it....lots of people are inspired by you.

    http://nonracerunner.blogspot.com/2011/01/moving-from-clueless-to-finding-answers.html

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  28. Anon must be such a remarkable individual who has everything figured out (sarcasm).

    It's nice to remind ourselves others have it worse, but seriously, if we kept it all in-all-the-time, we'd go crazy!!!

    This is your blog and I hope that we follow you, because we want to read your stories, struggles, and support you. Boo to ANON! You rock Beth!

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  29. It pisses me off that people have to be so rude. It's your blog, you can say what you want to say and NO, just because someone is far worse than you are doesn't mean you can't be down about your ailment or injury or whatever. It's human nature to be disappointed when we can't reach our goals or have setbacks or just plain have a shitty day....doesn't mean you aren't compassionate about others who endure far worse, it's just your god given right to be emotional about your own self! 'Nuff said!

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  30. No one has cornered the market on pain.

    There are things that I experience that no one else ever will and even if they have, they won't feel exactly as I do about that situation.

    There are things that I might never experience, but it doesn't mean that my pain/struggles are meaningless and not worth mentioning or thinking about just because they're not thought to be important/serious by another person's standards.

    Pain/struggle is personal in that no one can tell you how to feel, what's "really" important, etc. You are entitled to your feelings - because they're YOUR feelings. You're not asking anyone to feel the way you do.

    It's a matter of respect for our own individual experiences.

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  31. Who names their kid anonymous? Must have been teased a lot in school.

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  32. I started to write something, but it looks like I can just say "ditto" to all the above!

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  33. That is one my biggest pet peeves! Not when the comment is directed at me, but that anyone would say it or believe it. In session when clients make a comment like that I try to remind them that while no two people go through the same experience, pain, sadness, lonliness, any negative or positive emotion can be shared. And when people share, it isn't for a "solution" as much as it for a bond of the reaction and healing process. IMO when someone freaks out like that it's because unfortunately they have never been given the gift of the chance to express themseleves without strings attached or justification.

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  34. When my friend Renee was dying, she used to always say that misery/complaining/problems were relative to the moment in time. She LOVED listening to my menial complaints and yet treated them like they mattered.
    Plus, its a BLOG! YOUR BLOG! Say whatever the hell you want. I personally am glad that you told him/her to not read if he/she didn't like.
    Anon, no balls, poophead!

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  35. Well said David, Sarah, and Beth!

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  36. Oh man. While I know I have had it crappy over the last three years I also know others have had it worse. I don't ever want to minimize anothers experiences by trumping them with my own. We can all empathize, sympathize, and in return be heard and empathized with.

    While my husband is getting shot at in Afghanistan another's hubby is late for dinner...she is pissed. I could say "Well, at least he came home, in one piece, without shrapnel or a gun powder on his beard." But I don't. I say, "Ugh, I hate it when my hubby is late for dinner." Because I do hate it. Of course I hate it more when he is 11 months late for dinner but that is my life story, not hers.

    We all have our moments, and you needed yours. What gives? Sure people are struggling to get out of bed, I still want to run faster. 'Nuff said. Love your blog!

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  37. It is not the pain olympics. There will always be those worse off than we are, but that doesn't make what WE are experiencing any less valid.

    Honestly, I think that if readers weren't 100% sure that you KNOW you are blessed (mostly because you speak of it often), we wouldn't read here. Your blog never strikes me as a "woe is me" place. The fact that you handle what you are expreiencing with grace and tenacity is what brings us back...

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  38. People can or cannot read your blog.. if they dont like what they see, GO AWAY!

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  39. It's a running blog. We talk about our training. This is the context of our blogs. It does not mean that we are inured to the hardships of others. I am unimpressed with the Comment.

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  40. Anonymous comments make me mad. At least assume who you are if you will be rude! My God this is your blog, your stories, your life, YOUR PAIN. Who made pain a contest anyway?

    Thought about you and your arms placement pics from yesterday on my 3 miles run today and I ran my fastest splits EVER. Thank you for posting the pictures, it did help me.

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  41. Gosh, that comment is annoying. I started blogging because I like to write about my experiences - good and bad. The fact that people read them is a bonus, comment is an extra. But, comments should be positive and that certainly was not.
    Writing about what is going on in your world is a coping strategy for you. I assume that it is working as you continue to write - and well. If readers don't like it, there are other blogs.

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  42. How rude! It's all relative, suffering, grief, pain ... some suffer more, some suffer less, some react badly, some don't ... I don't think anyone can guess or feel that same as someone else.

    Years ago I struggled and felt guilty with -
    A. Having five children, having them easily, having them healthy - when there are women out there who struggle with infertility, those with just one or two who had endless problems. I eventually came to the realisation that instead of feeling guilty, I should feel blessed and happy for my situation, guilt is a waste of head space and isn't good and doesn't help anyone.

    B. Feeling guilty for whinging about little things that irritated me with DH when my sister (and others) was in an abusive relationship with a man who was useless at helping etc, I felt bad if I felt at all frustrated or annoyed with him because I should appreciate him so much (because he is great with the kids, helpful etc) ... I realised then that we are all in our own situations, how we feel is important to us - it doesn't matter if someone in a completely different situation has different levels of hurt.
    Not sure if that makes sense - but hopefully it means something - I know they were life changing "thinking" moments for me ;)

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  43. So what anonymous wants is for us to pretend that everything's all sweetness and light just because there are people out there who are worse off than us?! Nonsense!! I'm all about keeping it real. If you're having a crap day you can say that it's been crap. It certainly doesn't mean that you can't empathize with others misfortunes.

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  44. interestingly i just posted yesterday about how down I've been...it took me months to really want to admit it or say anything because I feel like I am so blessed, I have no right to complain, but the truth is we are all at different points in a journey and my pain is real and changes at different points in life.

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  45. Whoa, serious topic. I agree with you for the most part. But seriously, that title?? Can I get a that's what she said!?

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  46. this is your blog and you can write whatever you wanna write. of course there is greater suffering everywhere.
    but you are not writing a blog about world suffering.
    it's called shut up and run.
    cake balls...wow. those sound kinda good.

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  47. Don't ever feel badly about feeling badly. As long as you don't get stuck in the feeling, it's all part of the journey. Any comment under the veil of anonymity isn't worthy of your consideration. You're helping yourself by sharing and working through your frustration, and equally importantly you're helping others to realize that we're all dealing with pain, regardless of the degree, and we all struggle at times. Ultimately life is not a contest. Keep on doing what you do!

    Anonymous posters have cake balls.

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  48. I've thought about this a lot lately the whole, "It could be a lot worse," Statement. My philosophy is that it's all relative to the experiences you've encountered in your life or where you are in your life emotionally, physically, psychologically. If you've had a stroke and have been living with that disability for 10 years you are definitely in a different spot that someone who has just had a stroke so you can see things from a different perspective, you have had time to grieve your losses so to speak. Loss is real and there is a process that occurs with any loss, Denial, Anger, bargaining and then finally acceptance and to each person the journey is different and may take longer or you may go from anger and back to denial or whatever but it happens with every loss no matter how seemingly trivial it is to one person. My feeling is that if someone get's angry that you are going through your process on your blog about something "seemingly trivial" it's just because they are going through a process themselves and haven't reached acceptance with their loss and it's just an expression of their anger projected on you.

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  49. Unfortunately, we can't please everyone. Don't let your feelings be hurt..... looks like most people enjoy your blog.... I know I do!

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  50. So weird. I would think that Mr. Anon might know that this is a running blog he/she chose to read. Thus we will all be reading about every detail of your injury, emotional and physical, because this could be/is/has been us at some point.

    My mother has muscular dystrophy. She's bound to a motorized scooter and yet she would never refrain me from bitching to her about my sore muscles, or how I was hurting toward the end of a long run. Why? Because my mom is awesome and despite her problem she doesn't look at the world under a negative light... like Mr. Anon does.

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  51. There's a difference between commiserating, venting, and sharing your pain and someone who is a complainer, sees the glass half empty (no matter what the circumstance), and just lives their life in a poor me...poor me...pour me another fashion. You are NOT the type of person who thrives on the perception that you have it worse than the next person. You come across as having perspective.

    I am a new reader of you blog and I enjoy it. Most people bitch a little, talk about their challenges, laugh at themselves, and have difficultly thinking of rainbows and unicorns 24/7. But you don't seem like a self involved, negative person. That would be annoying.

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  52. WTF? This was a disappointing post. I thought based on the title you got a deep tissue massage...

    :-)

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  53. "There will always be greater suffering. But, I let her know that just because someone else might have it worse, doesn’t mean she has to feel guilty about sharing her pain."

    I completely agree with you. My husband and I often discuss things like "who has it worse" and it can turn into an argument if we are not careful. He thinks he had a bad day, I had a bad day, and we immediately try to "top" one another because we are both feeling bad. In reality, it could be a lot worse for both of us, but we still feel pain and sorrow and as human beings, we want to share that with one another. We all experience pain and frustration differently and I think we all have the right to share it within the forum that we choose (i.e. your blog or my blog) - your posts talk about your struggles as they pertain to you and I am thankful that you share what you are thinking and feeling with the rest of us because it is encouraging and lets me know that I am not alone!

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  54. We all have our struggles big and small. That doesn't mean we need to let it devolve into a "my struggle is worse than yours" contest. It's not about who suffers the most. It's about acknowledging that we all suffer and experience challenges in different ways and sharing our strategies for getting through those hard times. It's about being there for someone so they don't have to feel alone in WHATEVER they are dealing with. Sure, sometimes being a friend means giving another friend a kick in the butt when they need to stop dwelling and start moving forward. But even that is a form of caring and sharing in the challenge.

    Give me a break. Your tone is never one of pity and always genuine and honest. Keep it up!

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  55. My sister in law/dearest friend fought cancer for 7 years. For a long time I held back with sharing any of my-life complaints during our conversations. She finally had it out with me that I needed to share my life, my ups & downs, with her. You are exactly right that we each have our own path of woes to struggle through. Our family & friends can offer a lot of insight & support... but only if we open up and share.

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  56. Wow.

    We all have our own struggles to go through - and while they seem insurmountable at times to us, sometimes they seem like molehills to others. Regardless, they are OUR challenges and hills to climb.

    Everyone needs an ear now and again, everyone needs help now and again. That's what makes us human.

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  57. What a strange post from Anon, I would think that by now, all of your peep's that read you wonderful words of wiz'dom everyday, would know where you are coming from and know that you are thankful everyday for your strengths and the lessons you are learning while you are weak.(and getting stronger)

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  58. Everyone's journey is unique, and everyone's pain is subjective. We each have our strengths and weaknesses, and our pain tolerance (both emotional and physical) differs from one another.

    It does no good to suppress your own suffering just because someone else might "have it worse."

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  59. Hi ... first time here. Found you via ... somehow, I forget. Maybe twitter, maybe a blogroll somewhere. (I have a good memory, it's just short somedays) Love the title of your blog ... there's a few people in my world I'd like to say that to.

    My body has been to hell and back ... because of horrific injuries received in an accident. I almost lost my life and my leg. But just because I've experienced immense pain doesn't mean a paper cut doesn't hurt if I get one now.
    So in answer to your question ... "Do you believe that because there are people much worse off than we are, that we are never allowed to talk about our pain?" NO ... we all need the freedom to talk about whatever pain in in our worlds.
    Pain is relative ... and it all hurts. We all have different degrees of pain/challenges/issues in life and we need to recognize each persons pain and how it affects them.
    Looking forward to exploring more of your site.

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  60. Screw anon. Hate stupid gits like that. One of the downsides of a blog. Every moron with an opinion and nothing better to do wants to comment on yours.

    Love your writing. Love it. Keep it up.

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  61. If we can not be compassionate about other peoples suffering we can not be grateful for what we have. If we are not allowed to feel our own suffering we can not learn to move on in whatever way is comfortable, no matter how difficult. If we can not be inspired by how other people overcome or manage their suffering (whatever it is) how can we learn another method of coping that we may not otherwise be aware of. And just because one person's way of coping does not speak to someone, it does not mean that someone else is not inspired by it.

    This guy obviously does not understand any of that. Keep writing what you write and feeling what you feel. It inspires others, including me. And thanks for allowing others to feel what they feel and express that in these comments.

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  62. I think we are well aware that there is someone out there suffering worse than us. That is a given. It doesn't take away from the pain or suffering we are currently enduring. It's all relative. Mr. Anonymous can stop tuning into SUAR if he doesn't want to read about running injuries. We can all relate to you, Beth. You have such a positive attitude, anyway. Clearly, he isn't an avid reader or he would know that.

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  63. My super smart and awesome therapist says the whole "well, it could be worse..look at all I DO have to be thankfull for" is just a way to ignore the pain and "stuff it" down. Not all that healthy really... The feelings need to be felt whether or not someone else's feelings might be worse or more justified...you know? I think your determination is an inspiration. The struggle is part of it and I think it would stink if you left it out just because someone else may have worse problems...geez.

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